chromium
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If homosexuality is not a choice, then must there be genetic markers for it?
What about bisexuals? Should they also have distinct genetic markers for bisexuality?
How do people who believe that sexual orientation is not a choice explain bisexuals?
Is sexual orientation evidenced by sexual acts, falling in love (with a certain sex), or both?
I've heard many people say that it is not sexual acts alone. I agree. After all, everything (not everything you literal idiots) feels good with the lights off.
I haven't heard any comments on whether it is or isn't related to who you fall in love with. I have heard that sexual orientation is related strongly to attraction. As in: If you are attracted to the same sex then you are homosexual.
And that being attracted to whichever of the two sexes you are attracted to... never changes. This point I find difficult to agree with. I find that familiarity (among other things) breeds attraction. You become familiar by paying attention. Who you pay attention to is influenced in part by who is in your environment. Not that your environment forces you to pay a certain amount of attention to someone. It certainly does not.
It's a tricky call. Which is the cause of the other?
I looked at his butt as he walked by because I am attracted to him
Or
I became attracted after staring at his butt?
The first situation implies (to me) that I have no control over where my own eyes point. The second situation makes more sense to me.... Staring lead to contemplating and contemplating lead to lusting.
In guys who say they did not choose to be straight, I think they simply have not allowed themselves to get to the contemplating phase, or to get past it.
In guys who say they tried to be attracted to girls but it never worked.... Well, I don't want to argue with their personal experience. After all, they are firsthand, expert witnesses. Still, I think on a long enough timeline, with the right kind of contemplating, then attraction would occur. Attention comes first.
Well, i appreciate that you approach it with questions and an open mind. The way i would define sexuality is physical and emotional attraction to whatever gender. For your genetic marking question, I believe most research of late has indicated the womb environment and epimarks determines this.
The thing about your familiarity argument, I can buy that up to a point. My uncle had 3 kids and 20 years of marriage and finally came out last year. It's long been argued that sexuality exists on a spectrum. For people at the extreme of either end, familiarity alone cannot make them fall in love with someone they're not at all attracted to, not even if they see that person on a regular basis in a marriage.
How I would account for bisexuals is they are naturally attracted to both genders, to one degree or another. On the spectrum, they fall somewhere in between. I think where your point is most relevant is when we may glance at someone and not give it much thought, but after spending time with them, we may fall for their personality or their looks. This is not the same as sexuality changing though. A conclusion is appropriate after a person sees hundreds/thousands of people and every single case of being attracted is toward the same/opposite gender.
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