Do it. Go have sex with a man. Demonstrate your theory.well, that is where i disagree. i believe that we get attracted by... first, choosing to pay attention, then choosing what particular thoughts to entertain. then by choosing to let those thoughts/images continue long enough to have a reaction on us.
I identify as heterosexual. I fantasize sex with women. If i chose, I could picture a man, fantasize about him, and , as long as i push away the discomfort, ignore my fear of consequences, ignore what i thought my identity was all along, then i could enjoy this fantasy and masturbate to it. and orgasm. But, if i indulge in the thoughts that allowing this fantasy to go on will have negative consequences for me, then i am less likely to allow the fantasy to play out to the endpoint of orgasm. if i indulge my initial distaste, then i will never get past that distaste and discover the pleasure that this fantasy could lead to.
I think that is what people do. They immediately stop certain thoughts from continuing, OR after only a short time with minimal effort, they give up. This prevents the fantasy and the orgasm from ever developing. The reason, is that they chose to entertain the thoughts of the negative consequences. Now i understand that some of these neg consequences are very real. but that does not mean that they can not be ignored.
there are people who say they have tried and tried to get aroused by women. I don't dispute that. I dispute HOW they tried, and HOW long they tried, and how much effort they put into ignoring the potential neg consequences.