View Poll Results: At What Point Should A Transgendered Person Identify Themselves As Such?

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  • When you first meet them

    6 12.24%
  • When you become friends with them

    11 22.45%
  • When you bewcome close friends with them

    8 16.33%
  • Before a first date

    28 57.14%
  • Before dating deriously

    24 48.98%
  • Before sex the first time with them

    19 38.78%
  • Before becoming engaged

    16 32.65%
  • Never

    1 2.04%
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Thread: At What Point Should A Transgendered Person Identify Themselves As Such?

  1. #11
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    Re: At What Point Should A Transgendered Person Identify Themselves As Such?

    Quote Originally Posted by RabidAlpaca View Post
    I put the 4 things that had to do with dating/sexual relationships.

    It's not really anybody else's business if they're just friends or whatever. But when they start wanting to date someone, they deserve to know about it.
    Basically sums up exactly what I was going to post in my response.

    If we are just friends then no need to tell me unless they want to. If things start to go along a romantic route then I want to know before any sort of entanglement starts to occur (and yes entanglement can take on several meaning here - after typing it I realized that the word fits on multiple levels)
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    Re: At What Point Should A Transgendered Person Identify Themselves As Such?

    Quote Originally Posted by Redress View Post
    I find it one of those things where it is really hard to make a good call based on my opinions. I am not squeamish about the topic, I do not have to know in most situations. But there would certainly be a line where it would be important to know, not so much due to sex, but due to not being told meant hiding something from me kinda thing.
    This is basically my thought as well. I have no problem with trans people, and if my GF came to me and told me she was trans I would be hurt, but because she didn't trust me with that, not because she hid this massively important thing from me that dramatically effects our relationship. It's really not that big a deal in the grand scheme of things, at least to me.
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  3. #13
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    Re: At What Point Should A Transgendered Person Identify Themselves As Such?

    Quote Originally Posted by Josie View Post
    I would say that might be a dealbreaker for some people. It's best to get it out in the open before the first date, otherwise it's very deceptive and just .... wrong.

    I don't think it matters as much with friends.
    Dammit, I think I need to edit the OP again for more clarity. The intention of this is not in general, but with you specifically. It is something not common enough that there really is a societal norm I don't think.
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  4. #14
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    Re: At What Point Should A Transgendered Person Identify Themselves As Such?

    When they feel comfortable revealing it. They're really under no obligation to to reveal it at any point, especially if they're post-op.

    I'd prefer to be told, especially since it means my partner cannot produce half of the cells needed to procreate (assuming post op), but only so that we can make plans together to achieve our future goals.
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  5. #15
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    Re: At What Point Should A Transgendered Person Identify Themselves As Such?

    Quote Originally Posted by tessaesque View Post
    When they feel comfortable revealing it. They're really under no obligation to to reveal it at any point, especially if they're post-op.

    I'd prefer to be told, especially since it means my partner cannot produce half of the cells needed to procreate (assuming post op), but only so that we can make plans together to achieve our future goals.
    I would figure a bisexual would think it to be awesome, kinda like Frosted Mini-Wheats.

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    Don't like at me like that. That was damn funny.

  6. #16
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    Re: At What Point Should A Transgendered Person Identify Themselves As Such?

    Quote Originally Posted by Gipper View Post
    I would figure a bisexual would think it to be awesome, kinda like Frosted Mini-Wheats.

    "The adult in me likes the fiber side, but the kid in me loves the frosted side!"







    Don't like at me like that. That was damn funny.
    LOL. That might have something to do with my lack of affront over the idea...being attracted to both sexes definitely takes away some of the squeamishness of sleeping w/somebody who isn't your preferred sex.
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    Re: At What Point Should A Transgendered Person Identify Themselves As Such?

    Quote Originally Posted by tessaesque View Post
    LOL. That might have something to do with my lack of affront over the idea...being attracted to both sexes definitely takes away some of the squeamishness of sleeping w/somebody who isn't your preferred sex.
    I can relate. I've definitely lost my squeamishness of sleeping with bisexual women.

    "You're bi? *sigh* Okay, I guess I can live with it. Only because I like you so much. Hey, what's your friend's number again?"

  8. #18
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    Re: At What Point Should A Transgendered Person Identify Themselves As Such?

    Quote Originally Posted by Gipper View Post
    I can relate. I've definitely lost my squeamishness of sleeping with bisexual women.

    "You're bi? *sigh* Okay, I guess I can live with it. Only because I like you so much. Hey, what's your friend's number again?"
    Yeah, I'm not a "fun" bisexual. I don't share. The ONE time I agreed to a threesome I was miserable the entire time.
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  9. #19
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    Re: At What Point Should A Transgendered Person Identify Themselves As Such?

    Until a romantic or sexual direction occurs in the relationship, it is none of my business or my concern.

    However, the TG people I have met, in addition to my close TG friend, love to discuss the topic so chances are it would be revealed early on in the friendship.

  10. #20
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    Re: At What Point Should A Transgendered Person Identify Themselves As Such?

    It would depend on the circumstances. If the relationship is romantic/sexual, honesty must be immediate - if the relationship is casual, it's irrelevant - if it's casual but becomes possibly romantic/sexual, honesty must be immediate.

    No relationship that is based on dishonesty will last so why waste either of your time playing games.

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