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Were these parents too harsh on their daughter?

Did this teen get punished too harshly?

  • No

    Votes: 36 49.3%

  • Yes

    Votes: 12 16.4%

  • I would have looked at other options

    Votes: 20 27.4%

  • Counseling would have been best

    Votes: 5 6.8%
  • Total voters
    73
  • Poll closed .
Viktyr Gehrig said:
You've managed to conflate a massive case of self-deception with partisan hackery. Congratulations?
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Are you denying that the term "expressing themselves" did not originate from liberal beliefs when it came to discipline in schools?
 
Rocketman said:
Are you denying that the term "expressing themselves" did not originate from liberal beliefs when it came to discipline in schools?
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No, I'm saying that your claim that, as an adult and as a libertarian, you would not resent being humiliated is ridiculous and that turning an issue of bad parenting into a partisan issue is ridiculous and that your entire attitude toward the effective discipline of children is ridiculous.
 
Viktyr Gehrig said:
No, I'm saying that your claim that, as an adult and as a libertarian, you would not resent being humiliated is ridiculous and that turning an issue of bad parenting into a partisan issue is ridiculous and that your entire attitude toward the effective discipline of children is ridiculous.
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I agree. I understood and was prepared for the fact that my opinion would not be taken seriously (because of my age and unmarried/childless situation) by some people, but I see no correlation between political allegiance and the situation under discussion. I further agree that anyone, but especially a 13 year old girl, would resent being publicly humiliated. To employ public humiliation as a behavioural correction is both unintelligent and counter-productive.
 
Viktyr Gehrig said:
No, I'm saying that your claim that, as an adult and as a libertarian, you would not resent being humiliated is ridiculous and that turning an issue of bad parenting into a partisan issue is ridiculous and that your entire attitude toward the effective discipline of children is ridiculous.
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That must be why my kids are all successful adults and my stepson is already dead because his mother (my wife) believed as you do.
 
Rocketman said:
That must be why my kids are all successful adults and my stepson is already dead because his mother (my wife) believed as you do.
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Sometimes kids make good decisions despite the way they were raised. If you really used humiliation as a way to correct behavior, then that appears to be what happened.
 
Dittohead not! said:
Sometimes kids make good decisions despite the way they were raised. If you really used humiliation as a way to correct behavior, then that appears to be what happened.
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Humiliation and disappointment are great teachers of what life really is. It is easy to spot kids that were shielded from it. They can handle life.
 
Rocketman said:
Parents Force Girl to Hold Sign as Punishment for Being Disrespectful. Tough Love or Too Much?

Worried about their 13-year-old daughter's increasingly disrespectful behavior, Gentry and Renee Nickell of Crestview, Florida, decided to make her punishment humiliating and public. On Saturday, the teen (whose name has not been released) spent 90 minutes standing at a busy intersection with a hand-written sign describing her sins.

It read: "I’m a self-entitled teenager w/no respect for authority. I’m also super smart, yet I have 3 'D’s' because I DON’T CARE."

Yahoo! Shine - Women's Lifestyle | Healthy Living and Fashion Blogs
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Too much.. the object of discipline is not to humiliate.. it is to teach and correct.. These parents failed long before she was a rebellious and disrespectful teen.
 
Rocketman said:
Humiliation and disappointment are great teachers of what life really is. It is easy to spot kids that were shielded from it. They can handle life.
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CHILDREN LEARN WHAT THEY LIVE

Dorothy Law Nolte

If a child lives with criticism,
he learns to condemn.

If a child lives with hostility,
he learns to fight.

If a child lives with fear,
he learns to be apprehensive.

If a child lives with pity,
he learns to feel sorry for himself.

If a child lives with ridicule,
he learns to be shy.

If a child lives with jealousy,
he learns what envy is.
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and if he lives with humiliation, what do you think he learns?
 
sharon said:
Too much.. the object of discipline is not to humiliate.. it is to teach and correct.. These parents failed long before she was a rebellious and disrespectful teen.
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I agree, that let the world of PC and liberalism direct them up to this point.
 
Dittohead not! said:
CHILDREN LEARN WHAT THEY LIVE



and if he lives with humiliation, what do you think he learns?
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He doesn't live with it idiot, he learns from it just like an athlete that loses a game. Liberal idiots believe no child should suffer regardless of their actions. that is why we have idiot kids committing adult crimes.
 
Rocketman said:
He doesn't live with it idiot, he learns from it just like an athlete that loses a game. Liberal idiots believe no child should suffer regardless of their actions. that is why we have idiot kids committing adult crimes.
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and if the kid loses a game, do you hang a sign around his neck saying "loser"?

Is that what non liberals do?
 
Dittohead not! said:
and if the kid loses a game, do you hang a sign around his neck saying "loser"?

Is that what non liberals do?
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It is called a scoreboard slow one:lamo
 
Rocketman said:
He doesn't live with it idiot, he learns from it just like an athlete that loses a game. Liberal idiots believe no child should suffer regardless of their actions. that is why we have idiot kids committing adult crimes.
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I am looking at this message (in red) which appears at the head of every page on this forum -
The Forum Rules have been updated to reflect a new rule concerning offensive and disrespectful posts.
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I wonder if the moderators might have a view of your opening sentence?

As to the rest of your post - I do not consider it idiotic to believe that children should not suffer unnecessarily, or indeed at all. There is a certain philosophy, within a certain demographic, which believes that children are the property of those who produced them, and may be treated as those parents see fit. To those who entertain similar primitive beliefs, I would suggest these lines by Khalil Gibran -

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
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Leo said:
I am looking at this message (in red) which appears at the head of every page on this forum -
I wonder if the moderators might have a view of your opening sentence?

As to the rest of your post - I do not consider it idiotic to believe that children should not suffer unnecessarily, or indeed at all. There is a certain philosophy, within a certain demographic, which believes that children are the property of those who produced them, and may be treated as those parents see fit. To those who entertain similar primitive beliefs, I would suggest these lines by Khalil Gibran -
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Everyone loves a tattletail. When people change your post to say something it doesn't they should be called out on it.

That being said, I think those parents should be able to raise their kids as they see fit. Everyone here that has kids realizes that no two kids can be raised the same. of our 4, two of them were so sensitive and louder voice would make them cry and one of them would laugh at you when you were really eating his ass.
 
Rocketman said:
Parents Force Girl to Hold Sign as Punishment for Being Disrespectful. Tough Love or Too Much?

Worried about their 13-year-old daughter's increasingly disrespectful behavior, Gentry and Renee Nickell of Crestview, Florida, decided to make her punishment humiliating and public. On Saturday, the teen (whose name has not been released) spent 90 minutes standing at a busy intersection with a hand-written sign describing her sins.

It read: "I’m a self-entitled teenager w/no respect for authority. I’m also super smart, yet I have 3 'D’s' because I DON’T CARE."

Yahoo! Shine - Women's Lifestyle | Healthy Living and Fashion Blogs
Click to expand...

I don't have a problem with this form of punishment, but some parents need to learn that respect/authority is earned rather than something one is entitled to simply by nature of being a parent.
 
Rocketman said:
Everyone loves a tattletail. When people change your post to say something it doesn't they should be called out on it.
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LOL, what's a 'tattletail'? There is no such word - perhaps you meant to use the phrase 'tattle tale'? :mrgreen:

Rocketman said:
That being said, I think those parents should be able to raise their kids as they see fit. Everyone here that has kids realizes that no two kids can be raised the same. of our 4, two of them were so sensitive and louder voice would make them cry and one of them would laugh at you when you were really eating his ass.
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LOL (again), did you really mean to write 'eating his ass'? If so, I must confess that you have somewhat idiosyncratic methods of rearing children. :lol:

But I agree with your basic premise as expressed in the above paragraph. Of course children are individually different (as are adults,) and individually sensitive to the point where different methods need to be employed with each. None of which detracts from my points that (a) your children do not belong to you as property, and (b) no child should be made to suffer, either physically or psychologically.

I am quite sure that you (as with everyone else here) are a sincere person who is doing what you think is best for your children, and would not wish them harm in any possible way. But we are all products of our history and environment, and what we think is 'best' is not always incontrovertibly so. The state of being a parent does not make all one's views sacrosanct, and the victims of misguided good intentions are usually the children.
 
StillBallin75 said:
I don't have a problem with this form of punishment, but some parents need to learn that respect/authority is earned rather than something one is entitled to simply by nature of being a parent.
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100% incorrect. One does deserve respect from their own kid simply by being a parent. The kid knows nothing of the world, the parent does. The whole "respect must be earned" viewpoint, with kids and in general, is a huge reason why society is so fractured anymore. People use that as an excuse to be twits.

Said respect can be lost, however.
 
radcen said:
100% incorrect. One does deserve respect from their own kid simply by being a parent. The kid knows nothing of the world, the parent does. The whole "respect must be earned" viewpoint, with kids and in general, is a huge reason why society is so fractured anymore. People use that as an excuse to be twits.

Said respect can be lost, however.
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Sometimes the parents are the twits and the kids are the victims of abusive control freaks. With all the stories of stupid and unfit parents out there, you can't possibly think that someone holds moral authority over another simply because the child popped out of her vagina.

I'm not saying that that's what happened in this case. Some kids deserve ass-whoopings if not worse. But when you're being disrespected by your child, maybe part of the problem lies with you.
 
StillBallin75 said:
Sometimes the parents are the twits and the kids are the victims of abusive control freaks. With all the stories of stupid and unfit parents out there, you can't possibly think that someone holds moral authority over another simply because the child popped out of her vagina.

I'm not saying that that's what happened in this case. Some kids deserve ass-whoopings if not worse. But when you're being disrespected by your child, maybe part of the problem lies with you.
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This... I don't disagree with. Sometimes the parents are the twits. No doubt. And the kids will figure that out.

I have an issue with the whole "respect must be earned" thing in a general sense. In the case of kids, they don't have the discerning ability when young, so it's an unrealistic expectation... but they'll figure it out.

In a general sense, in my observations, people who say other people must earn their respect are really people who respect no one and just want a noble-sounding license to be their usual boorish selves.
 
Disrespecting another human and bullying by humiliation is completely wrong. Discipline it "to teach" ... they have not taught her anything except how to humiliate a kid in front of her peers.
 
Rocketman said:
Parents Force Girl to Hold Sign as Punishment for Being Disrespectful. Tough Love or Too Much?

Worried about their 13-year-old daughter's increasingly disrespectful behavior, Gentry and Renee Nickell of Crestview, Florida, decided to make her punishment humiliating and public. On Saturday, the teen (whose name has not been released) spent 90 minutes standing at a busy intersection with a hand-written sign describing her sins.

It read: "I’m a self-entitled teenager w/no respect for authority. I’m also super smart, yet I have 3 'D’s' because I DON’T CARE."

Yahoo! Shine - Women's Lifestyle | Healthy Living and Fashion Blogs
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Oh no - a kid stood around holding a sign. Must be some form of abuse :roll: It's creative and if anything - that's how you have to be with kids when you're trying to get them to understand ****.

This IS the other option for when the routine approaches to punish don't work.

Counseling? What the hell for - to talk about everything. "I don't care, I'm a moody ****er - so let me mope in a room and talk about my moody ****er feelings." Yeah - my parents did that to me . . . it was pointless. A waste of their money.
 
radcen said:
This... I don't disagree with. Sometimes the parents are the twits. No doubt. And the kids will figure that out.

I have an issue with the whole "respect must be earned" thing in a general sense. In the case of kids, they don't have the discerning ability when young, so it's an unrealistic expectation... but they'll figure it out.

In a general sense, in my observations, people who say other people must earn their respect are really people who respect no one and just want a noble-sounding license to be their usual boorish selves.
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There is a saying, attributed to Oscar Wilde, which goes something like this -

Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them.
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I think, in the general sense, it is accurate. Children start off by loving their parents unconditionally - respect does not come into it. They are weak and vulnerable creatures who depend upon mummy and daddy for their every need - as much psychologically as physically. They will give this unconditional love even in the face of mistreatment - sometimes for the length of their childhood and adolescence. Again - respect as we understand the term, does not feature in this emotional attachment. I loved my mother long before I respected her, and when that respect developed, it was because I understood the things she had done for me, and the sacrifices she had made on my behalf - not simply because she was my biological parent. And even now, I would not show her disrespect, but I do not agree with all her views. So I would disagree with your premise that respect is a due, and does not need to be earned, but I agree that there are sometimes boorish people who justify their behaviour with the 'respect must be earned' excuse.

My own approach being that everyone should be treated with a modicum of respect, until I know them sufficiently to either increase that to complete respect, or to withdraw that respect. Added to which are the layers of societal convention, common courtesy, and consideration for a fellow being - especially if they are elderly, or infirm.
 
I would have gotten the belt at her age for those things. If I had had the choice of that or holding up that same sign, I would have chosen the latter, no question. So, no, I don't think they were too harsh.
 
Leo said:
There is a saying, attributed to Oscar Wilde, which goes something like this -



I think, in the general sense, it is accurate. Children start off by loving their parents unconditionally - respect does not come into it. They are weak and vulnerable creatures who depend upon mummy and daddy for their every need - as much psychologically as physically. They will give this unconditional love even in the face of mistreatment - sometimes for the length of their childhood and adolescence. Again - respect as we understand the term, does not feature in this emotional attachment. I loved my mother long before I respected her, and when that respect developed, it was because I understood the things she had done for me, and the sacrifices she had made on my behalf - not simply because she was my biological parent. And even now, I would not show her disrespect, but I do not agree with all her views. So I would disagree with your premise that respect is a due, and does not need to be earned, but I agree that there are sometimes boorish people who justify their behaviour with the 'respect must be earned' excuse.

My own approach being that everyone should be treated with a modicum of respect, until I know them sufficiently to either increase that to complete respect, or to withdraw that respect. Added to which are the layers of societal convention, common courtesy, and consideration for a fellow being - especially if they are elderly, or infirm.
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Leo, you are such a wise young man.
 
radcen said:
100% incorrect. One does deserve respect from their own kid simply by being a parent. The kid knows nothing of the world, the parent does. The whole "respect must be earned" viewpoint, with kids and in general, is a huge reason why society is so fractured anymore. People use that as an excuse to be twits.

Said respect can be lost, however.
Click to expand...

this is simply not true. at all.

parenthood only relies on the ability to reproduce. nothing else.
 
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