You mean if you don't want women correcting your OP, don't mention them saying it is try to exclude them?
Didn't you read the part earlier where many that cheat would never tell - or would lie about it? My conclusion is that some posters are lying about not cheating.Well, now that we know that every person that responds to this thread is not, nor ever has been a cheater, can we assume the ones that have not responded are the cheaters?:2razz:
My wife had her annual physical yesterday and said if her test come back clean she won't need another (guess I have to say it) pap smear for 5 years. They now test for some virus and if you don't have it and have been married 10 years you are very low risk for cervical cancer. My response was the woman knows if she has been with another man in the last 10 years but she can't know for sure if her husband has been with anyone else. The doctors are setting up a big decision here for a man that has cheated on his wife when she comes home and tells him about her 5 year grace period. Tell her you have cheated may get you a divorce,don't tell her and you may be giving her cancer.What would or even will you do when this happens to you?
l am not man ,sawyer but l will say something
l believe a vast majority of men tend to cheat on their spouses although they claim they will never do it :lol:
the only reason some of them dont cheat is that they dont want to lose their wives and fear to harm their family life.
personally l wouldnt like to hear such confessions unless l suspect that l am being cheated on .
except when there is a health risk..
Your wife have an interesting take... It's a tough question to ask, I would want to know, but I would also immediately break up with my wife/GF. So I'd be asking my spouse to throw herself under the bus... which I think she should out of respect for me, because she didn't show any respect for me earlier...Is this question assuming the cheating sex is unprotected sex?
First, if you are cheating on your wife you are an ass. If you are cheating on your wife without a condom you are monster. Sorry.
The only unprotected sex I have ever had has been in committed relationships in which we were living together or married, and we had blood tests. Outside of that, such as in my bachelor days, I ALWAYS used condoms. So if I ever lost my marbles and cheated on my wife it would be protected and I would likely not tell my wife. Assuming it was a one-off kind of thing. If it was an actual affair, in which I wanted to keep seeing the woman, I would break up with my wife.
People who say the wife (or husband) has a right to know are painting with too broad of a brush, though. There are many people who would NOT want to know. I would want to know. My wife would not want to know. She has told me before, usually upon hearing about someone we know cheating on their significant other, that if I ever cheated on her to not let her find out.
Your wife have an interesting take...
Tell her you have cheated may get you a divorce,don't tell her and you may be giving her cancer.What would or even will you do when this happens to you?
It might partially be cultural as well. My wife is Cambodian and in Cambodia, and other parts of Asia, it is the norm for men to have women on the side. It doesn’t mean the women like it, they just accept it as the norm and hope the men keep it to themselves. I am not saying there aren’t Cambodian men who are loyal to their wives, I am just saying in my three years living there I didn’t meet any who declared themselves to be. So if that is the world you grow up in, I am sure it affects your outlook.
That said, I have met American women with that attitude, though admittedly they aren’t as common.
If you cheat and you are married you are obligated to tell your spouse, they have every right to know.
My wife had her annual physical yesterday and said if her test come back clean she won't need another (guess I have to say it) pap smear for 5 years. They now test for some virus and if you don't have it and have been married 10 years you are very low risk for cervical cancer. My response was the woman knows if she has been with another man in the last 10 years but she can't know for sure if her husband has been with anyone else. The doctors are setting up a big decision here for a man that has cheated on his wife when she comes home and tells him about her 5 year grace period. Tell her you have cheated may get you a divorce,don't tell her and you may be giving her cancer.What would or even will you do when this happens to you?
You have a low opinon of men if you think the vast majority cheat on their wives. I for instance have never cheated on any of my wives. :lol:
Is that maybe a cultural thing, too, like admitting you don't would make other men think you were odd?It might partially be cultural as well. My wife is Cambodian and in Cambodia, and other parts of Asia, it is the norm for men to have women on the side. It doesn’t mean the women like it, they just accept it as the norm and hope the men keep it to themselves. I am not saying there aren’t Cambodian men who are loyal to their wives, I am just saying in my three years living there I didn’t meet any who declared themselves to be. So if that is the world you grow up in, I am sure it affects your outlook.
That said, I have met American women with that attitude, though admittedly they aren’t as common.
Is that maybe a cultural thing, too, like admitting you don't would make other men think you were odd?
I disagree - it's matter of honor and commitment. I don't keep secrets from my wife. Keeping it secret is adding insult to injury. It would be bad enough to make one mistake, keeping it secret would only compound it.Ask a simple question. "To whose benefit would it be for one spouse to make such a disclosure?"
For the man who has cheated...to make a disclosure prior to the test results would be purely a guilt driven response. Or if you prefer...FEAR.
F=future
E=events
A=appearing
R=real
And then test results come back normal...???? Head banging against the wall time, finding an attorney, a new place to live....yadda, yadda, yadda...
If a woman is describing to her spouse how a test is conducted, the test criteria, and possible outcomes. I'd say that's an open, honest discussion with a spouse about a physical test...period. Had she cheated...in all likelihood she wouldn't have shared about the 5 year part with her husband? If I was her...and cheated, no way would I make all the details of the test included in a discussion with my spouse.
Soooooooooooo....?
I disagree - it's matter of honor and commitment. I don't keep secrets from my wife. Keeping it secret is adding insult to injury. It would be bad enough to make one mistake, keeping it secret would only compound it.
No, I could see someone having a fight with the wife, going out and getting drunk, then ending up screwing some bar fly in the parking lot, taking their anger out in some kind of perverted act of revenge. In fact, a friend of mine did that many years ago. And, no, he didn't tell as far as I know but that was on him.If you don't keep secrets from your wife....then you would never find yourself in such a compromising situation. Even if you have an open marriage it still wouldn't be a secret.
No, I could see someone having a fight with the wife, going out and getting drunk, then ending up screwing some bar fly in the parking lot, taking their anger out in some kind of perverted act of revenge. In fact, a friend of mine did that many years ago. And, no, he didn't tell as far as I know but that was on him.