View Poll Results: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

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Thread: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

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    Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    I'm fine with premarital casual sex and whatnot, but birth control should be used.

    Do you know what the poverty rate in the US is for families that wait until marriage to have children and stay married? 2%.

    The poverty rate for the general population is 13%, more than six times as high. Plus, children that grow up in single parent households are much more likely to end up involved in criminal activity.

    I look down on people that have children outside of marriage. They are hurting their children, their families, themselves, and their country.

    Also I'm an atheist so religion has nothing to do with why I believe this.

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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    People should wait until they're ready to have children, to have children.
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Yes, although I also personally believe that people should wait until they are married before having sex.
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    good families don't necessarily fit into one stereotype. my personal choice would be to marry before having kids, but i know plenty of people who had kids before getting married, and my own path could have easily been different. my opinion is that being a good parent and having a happy family is less dependent on marriage and more dependent on a conscious choice to put the kiddo first and to do the best that you can.

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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by Helix View Post
    good families don't necessarily fit into one stereotype. my personal choice would be to marry before having kids, but i know plenty of people who had kids before getting married, and my own path could have easily been different. my opinion is that being a good parent and having a happy family is less dependent on marriage and more dependent on a conscious choice to put the kiddo first and to do the best that you can.
    Bravo! Well stated!










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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Preferably yes.

    In addition to hopefully providing more stability in upbringing and family environment, studies show that children with married parents are less likely to grow up in poverty and less likely to have discipline problems.

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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by Voltaire X View Post
    I'm fine with premarital casual sex and whatnot, but birth control should be used.

    Do you know what the poverty rate in the US is for families that wait until marriage to have children and stay married? 2%.

    The poverty rate for the general population is 13%, more than six times as high. Plus, children that grow up in single parent households are much more likely to end up involved in criminal activity.

    I look down on people that have children outside of marriage. They are hurting their children, their families, themselves, and their country.

    Also I'm an atheist so religion has nothing to do with why I believe this.
    I think people should wait until they're married to have children. "We're not ready yet" simply doesn't resonate with me. If a couple is ready to bring a child into the world? They should be ready to get married. Playing house is fine; but without the benefit of marriage? In reality, that's all it is. "Playing house." Unless two people structure their coupled relationship like two Philadelphia lawyers, they can expect very little help from the courts should their partnership dissolve. That can make for a nasty, painful and expensive break-up. That's not conducive to good parenting.
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by MaggieD View Post
    I think people should wait until they're married to have children. "We're not ready yet" simply doesn't resonate with me. If a couple is ready to bring a child into the world? They should be ready to get married. Playing house is fine; but without the benefit of marriage? In reality, that's all it is. "Playing house." Unless two people structure their coupled relationship like two Philadelphia lawyers, they can expect very little help from the courts should their partnership dissolve. That can make for a nasty, painful and expensive break-up. That's not conducive to good parenting.
    I disagree. I don't think marriage makes a difference, but I do think that a mom and dad in the picture is important. Why is marriage more meaningful than just being together as a couple?

    I'm sorry, maybe I'm just jaded about marriage, but IMO it is nothing more than a piece of paper and a couple of rings with some meaningless vows and the obligatory celebratory activities.

    People, of course, will say that if you are "married" that means that it makes you somehow more committed to one another than a couple who isn't married, but I'm not buying it.

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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    I think couples should have children when they they are ready to have children. Especially in Quebec common law couples have children and they are fine. Though recently there was a case of separation of a common law couple with three kids and the father now pays 36,000$/month in child support. So I think the kids will be fine.

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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by Helix View Post
    good families don't necessarily fit into one stereotype. my personal choice would be to marry before having kids, but i know plenty of people who had kids before getting married, and my own path could have easily been different. my opinion is that being a good parent and having a happy family is less dependent on marriage and more dependent on a conscious choice to put the kiddo first and to do the best that you can.
    The couples that have kids before marriage but end up getting married later or at least stay together aren't the problem. I don't have any problem with that. But all too often, one parent (usually the father) leaves, and then the child is growing up in a single parent household. I've seen that happen too many times, and it breaks my heart every time.

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