View Poll Results: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

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Thread: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

  1. #211
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by radcen View Post
    If you're saying that the results are guaranteed if you just make good decisions, I strongly disagree. Sometimes people who deserve the best get shafted and people who deserve nothing luck into fortune.
    There are no guarantees in life. Good decisions don't always result in success. Bad decisions most often do.

    Getting pregnant very young. Rinse. Repeat.
    Not getting at least a high school education.
    Picking a loser for a partner.

    ^^The perfect recipe for failure. Always? Of course not. More likely than not? Yep.
    The devil whispered in my ear, "You cannot withstand the storm." I whispered back, "I am ​the storm."

  2. #212
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by MaggieD View Post
    There are no guarantees in life. Good decisions don't always result in success. Bad decisions most often do.

    Getting pregnant very young. Rinse. Repeat.
    Not getting at least a high school education.
    Picking a loser for a partner.

    ^^The perfect recipe for failure. Always? Of course not. More likely than not? Yep.
    More than likely? I'm with ya. Your previous statement that I responded to came off as pretty definitive, though, and didn't leave room for exceptions.
    Last edited by radcen; 02-04-13 at 11:03 AM.
    If you claim sexual harassment to be wrong, yet you defend anyone on your side for any reason,
    then you are a hypocrite and everything you say on the matter is just babble.

  3. #213
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by cpwill View Post
    Actually it kind of is. The same intent was simply carried out through a different ceremony wherein they cut off the tips of baby boys' penis' when they were a few days old. As near as I am aware there was no similar ceremony for girls.
    Which isn't baptism.

    Quote Originally Posted by cpwill View Post
    That is not accurate - entire households (to include children) were baptized in the New Testament.
    It doesn't say that infants were baptized. Nowhere does it speak of an infant being born and then being baptized.



    Quote Originally Posted by cpwill View Post
    So children cannot be saved? Jesus was only kidding when He spoke of the special nature of those who accept Him like a child? If my five year old boy (who does sin) dies today, he goes to hell because he didn't manage to make it to his 13th birthday? Josie, that makes no sense.
    I do not believe children go to Hell until they fully understand how sin affects their lives. Your five your old most likely doesn't fully understand. Once he DOES understand, he should WANT to be baptized so that his sins will be washed away.


  4. #214
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Marriage isn't the most important component, planning and execution are. Getting married before having children was always the SOP because part of the whole marriage thing was the supposition that you'd have children and this was part of preparing for them. It's one of the things people getting married and those just married think about. That spurs them to get to planning an preparing.

  5. #215
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Though an atheist, in my opinion couples should wait until marriage. They should also wait with marriage until they've got enough responsibility under their belts. If the two were to wait until they're ready, and then they seal the deal with something as important as marriage, that should make them feel that this is no small deal. Now that they've grown enough and have shown they are ready to have children, then do so after marriage. Oftentimes I read how two people have children before marriage, and one or both of the people involved don't take it seriously enough... that they're not "bound" to something truly important.

  6. #216
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by Josie View Post
    Which isn't baptism.

    It doesn't say that infants were baptized. Nowhere does it speak of an infant being born and then being baptized.

    I do not believe children go to Hell until they fully understand how sin affects their lives. Your five your old most likely doesn't fully understand. Once he DOES understand, he should WANT to be baptized so that his sins will be washed away.
    You don't believe...does that make it law then? That it makes sense to you? Honestly...

    Hopefully the child will understand Baptism and organised religion are as real as your Tinkerbell and they will steer clear of all of the above like any sensible person with a grasp of reality does.

    @ the OP, in fairness to the child I would prefer to be in a stable relationship before even considering it. That would probably involve marriage. But I have been married and chosen not to have a child within that marriage because I didn't feel the relationship was right for it. Therefore, from experience I would have to say it isn't the marriage but the relationship which was the determining factor for me.

    But marriage does provide a bit more financial stability in law if you can enforce it and I suppose that is a good thing if your relationship goes south and you are left with children to raise.

  7. #217
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by Voltaire X View Post
    I'm fine with premarital casual sex and whatnot, but birth control should be used.

    Do you know what the poverty rate in the US is for families that wait until marriage to have children and stay married? 2%.

    The poverty rate for the general population is 13%, more than six times as high. Plus, children that grow up in single parent households are much more likely to end up involved in criminal activity.

    I look down on people that have children outside of marriage. They are hurting their children, their families, themselves, and their country.

    Also I'm an atheist so religion has nothing to do with why I believe this.
    I agree with you, for the same reasons. I think it's a good idea to be married when you have children, as it at least indicates outwardly that you have some type of commitment to the relationship. It's also harder to get out of a marriage than to just simply leave a cohabitation relationship. It's not perfect, but children need the maximum chance of being raised by an intact family.
    "God is the name by which I designate all things which cross my path violently and recklessly, all things which alter my plans and intentions, and change the course of my life, for better or for worse."
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  8. #218
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by Josie View Post
    Which isn't baptism.
    No, it is merely the OT ceremony which performs the same function - welcoming the new member of God's People.


    Baptism does not save you. It has precisely zero effect whatsoever on your salvation, your sanctification, it has precisely zero effect on your status as a Child of God, having water splashed on you or getting dunked beneath it has no spiritual or physical effect whatsoever - except that it is a symbol (and a powerful one) of rebirth through water into the family of Christ. It marks you as one of Ours.

    It doesn't say that infants were baptized. Nowhere does it speak of an infant being born and then being baptized.
    that is correct. Neither does it say what you claim - that only adults were baptized. Indeed, quite the opposite, the NT is clear that entire households - to include children - were baptized and considered part of the family of believers. Never does the New Testament suggest that an 11 year old is different in this regards to an 8 year old, nor an 8 year old to a 7 year old, nor a 7 year old to a 6 year old, and on down the line.

    I do not believe children go to Hell until they fully understand how sin affects their lives.
    No one fully understands how sin effects our lives - ones' Walk is a constant learning process. This rule would mean that no one could go to hell. But children know full well that they choose to do wrong things, just as adults do.

    Your five your old most likely doesn't fully understand. Once he DOES understand, he should WANT to be baptized so that his sins will be washed away.
    And then on the trip to the church after he understands, before he can be baptized we are hit by an 18-wheeler and then? No - God's redemptive power is not limited by the scheduling conflicts, or riverine access of humans.

    On the contrary, when my son wants God to forgive him, he firsts asks the person he hurt for forgiveness (usually his brother), and then when we pray at night he asks God. God has never, so far as I am aware, responded that He will not accept repentance until ones' head has gotten water on it. Jesus did not demand baptism of the thief on the cross, he accepted his repentance and faith.

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