View Poll Results: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

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  • Yes

    60 78.95%
  • No

    3 3.95%
  • I don't know

    2 2.63%
  • I don't care

    11 14.47%
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Thread: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

  1. #101
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by ChrisL View Post
    People should decide for themselves whether or not marriage is good for them or not. It's really not anyone else's business except for the two involved. Many people just can't work out their differences, and who is to say that is because they are "selfish" or what the reason. That is just arrogant.

    And IMO "staying together for the kids" can have just as many destructive results as divorce.


    all l know is this a serious decision made about your life and many people see it as easy as a job agreement .and divorce must not be as easy as leaving your job either .


    unless there are very valid reasons to divorce ,l dont approve it
    "Sovereignty is not given, it is taken." ATATÜRK

  2. #102
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by Medusa View Post
    all l know is this a serious decision made about your life and many people see it as easy as a job agreement .and divorce must not be as easy as leaving your job either .


    unless there are very valid reasons to divorce ,l dont approve it
    Well, not to be rude, but MOST people probably don't consider YOUR feelings when considering a divorce. They do what is best for themselves at the time.

  3. #103
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by ChrisL View Post
    Yeah, blah, blah, blah. People should do what they want and what makes them happy. Screw the stats.
    Because what makes you happy isn't necessarily what is going to provide for long term stability. Everybody thinks that they're the exception.
    The morality of abortion is not a religious belief, any more than the morality of slavery, apartheid, rape, larceny, murder or arson is a religious belief. These are norms of the natural law of mankind and can be legislated even in a completely religionless society.

  4. #104
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by ChuckBerry View Post
    Because what makes you happy isn't necessarily what is going to provide for long term stability. Everybody thinks that they're the exception.
    Exactly. Practice what you preach.

  5. #105
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by ChrisL View Post
    Well, not to be rude, but MOST people probably don't consider YOUR feelings when considering a divorce. They do what is best for themselves at the time.
    yes ,and l know they must have reasons .but if l had children ,i would consider only my children .

    l would try to make them happy,because l know the fact of being unhappy in your childhood will always follow you in the future
    "Sovereignty is not given, it is taken." ATATÜRK

  6. #106
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by Medusa View Post
    yes ,and l know they must have reasons .but if l had children ,i would consider only my children .
    You've missed my point completely.

  7. #107
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by EarlzP View Post
    Lots of good points in your post, this is what I think

    1-A divorce agreement should be drawn up before the marriage takes place
    2- A marriage licence should be renewed every four years or the divorce agreement should be automatically be enforced.

    To many marriages end up in divorce exposing children to their parents fighting like cats and dogs over the silverware, get it done before it happens and avoid the long drawn out battle.

    If couples knew that either one could just walk away after 4 years they would try a little harder to make their partner happy, taking your partners love for granted is the best way I know to be disappointed.
    Part of what you wish for is available through a prenuptial agreement. The four-year re-up? In your dreams.

    Quote Originally Posted by Muhammed View Post
    I don't think that at all.

    Just pointing out the fact that for some mothers that IRA tax shelter, that social security survivors benefits and that COBRA stuff is nonexistent and therefore amounts to absolutely nothing. It's totally irrelevant to them.

    If baby daddy works on cars for cash and maybe sells a bit of marijuana or slings some 'caine on the side for extra cash none of that means a thing.
    Respectfully, I don't think this thread is intended to address those dysfunctional couples where the woman picks a complete idiot to father her children.

    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Guerrilla View Post
    Not that, you still have your SO live with you, you just report it otherwise.
    That way you get the dual benefit of an income and full state aid.

    There are a lot of people who do this.
    I know. Ha! Pisses me off to no end.

    Quote Originally Posted by ChrisL View Post
    Lots of religious people thought they would burn in hell if they got a divorce. Then all of the sudden, the church got a new revelation. Yes, God himself spoke and said that people CAN get a divorce now I guess.
    The Catholic Church has no problem with divorce (as a last resort, of course). It's problem is that, if the marriage was sanctioned by the Catholic Church to begin with? Any remarriage is considered adultery.
    The devil whispered in my ear, "You cannot withstand the storm." I whispered back, "I am ​the storm."

  8. #108
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by MaggieD View Post
    The Catholic Church has no problem with divorce (as a last resort, of course). It's problem is that, if the marriage was sanctioned by the Catholic Church to begin with? Any remarriage is considered adultery.
    For some people, I'm sure this is the same as not allowing them to be divorced. I find it interesting that even the Puritans allowed people to divorce of their own free will without "consequences" from the church.

    "Most Christian churches treat divorce negatively; however, different Christian denominations vary in their toleration of it. The Roman Catholic Church treats all consummated sacramental marriages as permanent during the life of the spouses, and therefore does not allow remarriage after a divorce if the other spouse still lives and the marriage has not been annulled. However, divorced Catholics are still welcome to participate fully in the life of the church so long as they have not remarried against church law, and the Catholic Church generally requires civil divorce or annulment procedures to have been completed before it will consider annulment cases. Other Christian denominations, including the Eastern Orthodox Church and many Protestant churches, will allow both divorce and remarriage even with a surviving former spouse, at least under certain conditions. In societies that practiced Puritanism, divorce was allowed if one partner in the marriage was not completely satisfied with the other, and remarriage was also allowed."

  9. #109
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    I have a daughter outside of marriage with my fiance. She is 19 months old. Do i regret her, no. Would I have done things differently if i could, yes. I believe having children outside of marriage is predominantly irresponsible and unfair to the child.

    I'll keep it as short as that since it's a personal topic for myself.
    Last edited by ex99; 01-26-13 at 10:14 AM. Reason: auto correct on android

  10. #110
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    Re: Should people wait until marriage to have children?

    Quote Originally Posted by ex99 View Post
    I have a daughter outside of marriage with my fiance. She is 19probably months old. Do i regret her, no. Would I have done things differently if i could, yes. I believe having children outside of marriage is predominantly irresponsible and unfair to the child.

    I'll keep it as short as that since it's a personal topic for myself.
    And, in far too many instances, it's the quickest way into poverty we have to offer.
    The devil whispered in my ear, "You cannot withstand the storm." I whispered back, "I am ​the storm."

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