The whole reason why we're even discussing this is because it's NOT being ignored - ignoring it would be staying married even if you hate each other. . . that's ignoring it.
If someone's divorcing - trust me - they're suffering. . . I don't see how you can think otherwise. Divorce is hard, it sucks - even for the offending party that committed the wrong it's hard. I don't know ANY joyously happy divorces who were at main fault for causing the breaking of their marriage. They usually have a lot of personal baggage that they carry around.
The consequences are stark no matter what the situation - you no longer are in a solid family environment. You cannot share household issues with someone else. You cannot see your child every night - you cannot be there for them for everything like you would have otherwise regardless of the custody balance in the end.
Sounds ****ty to me - I can't imagine not being full-time mom to all 4 of my kids. That'd be hell. It would never be enough to see them just sometimes or on the weekends or however else it works out . . . and what if the other moves away and such? Ugh.
The divorce - balancing custody - cost of divorce (which can get high up there if you mediate, etc) - and loss of dignity and everything else . . . it doesn't sound like a cakewalk to me. Mine was uncontested but I still had to deal with him for a long time afterward.
Are you thinking of divorce as a pleasant fun event or someting? Your concept of what a divorced joint custody life is like is a bit baffling . . . I left my ex because he was abusive but it sucked having to live with my parents and work **** jobs to make my own ends meet without even so much as having child support from him.