View Poll Results: For women: would you bear a child who was conceived from a rape?

Voters
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  • Yes, I'd bear the child and raise it

    4 17.39%
  • Yes, I'd bear the child and give it up for adoption

    0 0%
  • No, I would have an abortion

    16 69.57%
  • No, I would seek out plan B, but if it didn't work I raise it

    0 0%
  • No, I would seek out plan B, but if it didn't work, I would give it up for adoption

    0 0%
  • Undecided/don't know

    3 13.04%
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Thread: For women: would you bear a child who was conceived from a rape?

  1. #81
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    Re: For women: would you bear a child who was conceived from a rape?

    Quote Originally Posted by ChrisL View Post
    It's a horrible situation that I'm sure we all wish we could prevent.

    Aunt Spiker's situation is just the kind of situation I am referring to. She feels the way she feels. There is nothing I can do to change this, and I don't think she is "wrong" for the way she feels. I would NEVER condemn her for her decision to do what she feels is right or look down upon her for it, but I can still be pro-life in the fact that I don't have to agree with it either, and I can still think that it is a shame that circumstances led to this decision.

    You can be pro-life but also be realistic about it. Just because I'm pro-life does not mean that I am too obtuse to recognize that in some cases that is just asking TOO much from a person. I can totally understand how a woman's mental health and/or life could be effected by situations like these, but I can still feel sad about the loss of a potential life and that women even have to make such "choices."

    I don't understand why everyone thinks you have to so rigid in your thinking and cannot take a more realistic approach to things. It doesn't undermine what I would PREFER to see happen.
    I don't dispute your right to be pro-life and I do recognize "good motives" in your having such a view. Unless you wish to go further and force your opinions on women by laws, I have no dispute with you. Just very strong disagreements.

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    Re: For women: would you bear a child who was conceived from a rape?

    Please keep in mind my question is regarding what a woman would choose to do, not be forced to do. I appreciate everyone's honesty in their replies, and I am sympathetic to the situations I have read about so far.
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    Re: For women: would you bear a child who was conceived from a rape?

    Quote Originally Posted by ChrisL View Post
    Like I said, I know some people who were adopted (and so do YOU apparently), who have turned into WONDERFUL people and are very happy. Giving a child the chance to live is NOT throwing the child away. Your statements about people who have made an informed decision to put their child up for adoption, adoptive parents and people who have been adopted are completely bogus and totally unfair and without merit.
    Again, since I don't believe a ZEF is a "child," arguing about giving the "child" a "right to life" is the endless abortion debate.

    I am VERY strong against a woman giving up a child at birth UNLESS it arranged for alterative good parents IS throwing the child away. Yes, some people are raised wonderfully by adoptive parents. She was. BUT her adoptive mother is the sister of her bio-mother as a young teen and it known the older sister (her adoptive mother) was incapable of having children. She describes her childhood and her adoptive parents as "perfect." BUT she was NOT thrown away. Who would be her parents before her birth was known and known to be great potential parents.

    Throwing a newborn into "the system" is just a crap shoot. Some babies win. Some lose. I lost. Many do.

    I was a thrown away baby. I was $63.47 to $112.18 plus some food stamps to those people. And, like all the other male children dumped there, just little animals to abuse, assault, torment and use sadistically in ways I won't write of. Female little children were of even less value other than the monthly G-money that they kept receiving for 18 years whether the girl was still alive or not, and none of the girls were for long. I doubt any of those girls survived to adulthood and certainly less than 50% of the males, most of those severely and permanently crippled and multilated physically and psychologically. I was lucky and I managed to escape at age 15. I took a newborn baby girl with me. She wouldn't have lived through the next day had I not. She is now my college age adoptive daughter.

    The pro-life posters of the wonderful loving young white couple holding the beautiful little blue eyed white little baby is mostly just a myth. There are exceptions. But those are exceptions to the rule. The "good stories" tend to be pre-arranged adoptions, not children thrown into the system.

    And then there are all the children born with severe physical and mental disabilities that are basically just left lying in a corner all their lives in a true living hell, maybe worse than my childhood and youth was.

    Unless the birth mother has made specific arrangements for legally bound wonderful parents, in my opinion that birth mother has total moral obligation and duty to raise the child she gave birth to as perfectly as she is able to. No more throwing away babies at birth into the unknown - claiming that is the moral thing to do. It is obscenely evil - my opinion of it.

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    Re: For women: would you bear a child who was conceived from a rape?

    That's like asking if you would have the nerve to hide Jews during WWII. Unless you were there, how could you say, truthfully?

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    Re: For women: would you bear a child who was conceived from a rape?

    Quote Originally Posted by joko104 View Post
    I don't dispute your right to be pro-life and I do recognize "good motives" in your having such a view. Unless you wish to go further and force your opinions on women by laws, I have no dispute with you. Just very strong disagreements.
    I don't want to ban anything. There IS such a thing as a necessary evil, but that doesn't mean that I have to like it or agree with it. I think it is always wise for women to be FULLY informed about ALL of their choices before being "encouraged" to seek out an abortion.

    Also, I know a woman who gave a child up for adoption because she was only 15 when she got pregnant. She and the father came to the decision together. I didn't know her at that time, but I can say that she is a mother now of other children and is a great mom. She did what she believed to be what was BEST for her child and would completely disagree with you that she threw her child away.

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    Re: For women: would you bear a child who was conceived from a rape?

    Quote Originally Posted by joko104 View Post
    Again, since I don't believe a ZEF is a "child," arguing about giving the "child" a "right to life" is the endless abortion debate.

    I am VERY strong against a woman giving up a child at birth UNLESS it arranged for alterative good parents IS throwing the child away. Yes, some people are raised wonderfully by adoptive parents. She was. BUT her adoptive mother is the sister of her bio-mother as a young teen and it known the older sister (her adoptive mother) was incapable of having children. She describes her childhood and her adoptive parents as "perfect." BUT she was NOT thrown away. Who would be her parents before her birth was known and known to be great potential parents.

    Throwing a newborn into "the system" is just a crap shoot. Some babies win. Some lose. I lost. Many do.

    I was a thrown away baby. I was $63.47 to $112.18 plus some food stamps to those people. And, like all the other male children dumped there, just little animals to abuse, assault, torment and use sadistically in ways I won't write of. Female little children were of even less value other than the monthly G-money that they kept receiving for 18 years whether the girl was still alive or not, and none of the girls were for long. I doubt any of those girls survived to adulthood and certainly less than 50% of the males, most of those severely and permanently crippled and multilated physically and psychologically. I was lucky and I managed to escape at age 15. I took a newborn baby girl with me. She wouldn't have lived through the next day had I not. She is now my college age adoptive daughter.

    The pro-life posters of the wonderful loving young white couple holding the beautiful little blue eyed white little baby is mostly just a myth. There are exceptions. But those are exceptions to the rule. The "good stories" tend to be pre-arranged adoptions, not children thrown into the system.

    And then there are all the children born with severe physical and mental disabilities that are basically just left lying in a corner all their lives in a true living hell, maybe worse than my childhood and youth was.

    Unless the birth mother has made specific arrangements for legally bound wonderful parents, in my opinion that birth mother has total moral obligation and duty to raise the child she gave birth to as perfectly as she is able to. No more throwing away babies at birth into the unknown - claiming that is the moral thing to do. It is obscenely evil - my opinion of it.
    That has nothing to do with anything. Some biological parents kill their own children too. Sometimes a stranger kills someone child. Just because someone is not the biological parent does NOT mean that they would do the child harm. In fact, I would be willing to bet that less adoptive parents kill their children than do biological parents, so that point is moot. There are NEVER guarantees in life.

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    Re: For women: would you bear a child who was conceived from a rape?

    Quote Originally Posted by ChrisL View Post
    I don't want to ban anything. There IS such a thing as a necessary evil, but that doesn't mean that I have to like it or agree with it. I think it is always wise for women to be FULLY informed about ALL of their choices before being "encouraged" to seek out an abortion.

    Also, I know a woman who gave a child up for adoption because she was only 15 when she got pregnant. She and the father came to the decision together. I didn't know her at that time, but I can say that she is a mother now of other children and is a great mom. She did what she believed to be what was BEST for her child and would completely disagree with you that she threw her child away.
    What happened to that child?

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    Re: For women: would you bear a child who was conceived from a rape?

    Quote Originally Posted by Uzidoesit View Post
    That's like asking if you would have the nerve to hide Jews during WWII. Unless you were there, how could you say, truthfully?
    You can't say with certainty, but you can estimate, based on your value systems, beliefs, and your ability to put emotions and intellect into proper perspective.
    "God is the name by which I designate all things which cross my path violently and recklessly, all things which alter my plans and intentions, and change the course of my life, for better or for worse."
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    Re: For women: would you bear a child who was conceived from a rape?

    Quote Originally Posted by joko104 View Post
    What happened to that child?
    I'm so glad you asked. As a matter of fact, the adoptive parents were quite actively involved in pregnancy and birth of the child, and they remain friends with my friend, and the "child" who is now 17, is doing just fine.

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    Re: For women: would you bear a child who was conceived from a rape?

    There are some wonderful adoption programs around that will allow the birth parents to get to know the potential adoptive parents.

    Open adoption - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

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