View Poll Results: What's wrong with these people?

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Thread: Inability to understand love

  1. #41
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    Re: Inability to understand love

    Quote Originally Posted by ecofarm View Post
    Whatever, dude. I was just trying to explain where the argument, which baffles you, is coming from. You claimed you had no clue what was going on, and I tried to help. I had no intention of getting into anything personal.
    Sorry if I misunderstood your intentions.

    I appreciate your efforts.

  2. #42
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    Re: Inability to understand love

    Quote Originally Posted by ecofarm View Post
    That's another angle, good point.
    I'll just say in the most clinical way that, love is an evolutionary survival mechanism.
    It benefits the whole human species, that we love each other.
    I was discovering that life just simply isn't fair and bask in the unsung glory of knowing that each obstacle overcome along the way only adds to the satisfaction in the end. Nothing great, after all, was ever accomplished by anyone sulking in his or her misery.
    —Adam Shepard

  3. #43
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    Re: Inability to understand love

    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Guerrilla View Post
    I'll just say in the most clinical way that, love is an evolutionary survival mechanism.
    It benefits the whole human species, that we love each other.
    Whatever our personal vision of it may be, it's important to at least understand where others are coming from, even if we disagree for a variety of reasons.

  4. #44
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    Re: Inability to understand love

    Quote Originally Posted by ecofarm View Post
    Whatever our personal vision of it may be, it's important to at least understand where others are coming from, even if we disagree for a variety of reasons.
    I understand it, but basically the argument is a restatement of what baffles me. Why do people think that the primary motivator would be some type of internal reward or avoidance of an internal punishment, instead of using occams razor here and not going around the world to not see what is right in front of them. someone needed help and that in and of itself is the need, which is external, not internal. It makes no sense to me.

  5. #45
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    Re: Inability to understand love

    Quote Originally Posted by megaprogman View Post
    I understand it, but basically the argument is a restatement of what baffles me. Why do people think that the primary motivator would be some type of internal reward or avoidance of an internal punishment, instead of using occams razor here and not going around the world to not see what is right in front of them. someone needed help and that in and of itself is the need, which is external, not internal. It makes no sense to me.
    Well, that depends on your creation belief.
    If you're particularly religious, you'd likely believe that love was given by god and is (imo) more likely to be selfless.
    If you're not really religious, it's more likely that you could believe that love, came about because it furthers the continuation of humanity, a long term benefit, but a benefit none the less.
    I was discovering that life just simply isn't fair and bask in the unsung glory of knowing that each obstacle overcome along the way only adds to the satisfaction in the end. Nothing great, after all, was ever accomplished by anyone sulking in his or her misery.
    —Adam Shepard

  6. #46
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    Re: Inability to understand love

    Heah Mega Glad to see another Aspie on this site. I got you right away. For us (Aspies) our socialization "cricuitry" is not damaged its off. Those parts of the brain that allow others to read body langauge or understand social cues or evoke empathy is off (not operational). Many of us learn to sidetrack this and how to function in society because we had some type of help.
    There are many who did not recieve this help and think that how they behave or react is "normal" and everyone should accept it. This characteristic along with our normal "policeman" mentality makes the unaware Aspie come off as socially ackward and distant some times even insenssitive.
    Then you have the A Social personality who cannot feel any positive emotions for anyone except themselves and they view all other reactions in that light. They are usually abrupt, insensitive and hostile when their views are challenged.

    The next step is the Sociopath who is incapable of feeling any emotion at all for anyone. They seem from a psychological point of view almost zombie like. the problem is that these people have learned very effectively how to fake it and a fair number of them are either sadists or serial killerss (Ted Bundy)

    The last group are those in our society that grew up in a "repressed" environment with regards to things like emotion. They accept this veiw of the world because it is their world and are extremely resistant to change and will become hostile if this view is challenged.
    They are relatively easy to spot in society and tend to group together for support. I am not talking about people who were told crying is wrong, but those who were taught sometimes in severe ways that showing any type of emotion is wrong.

    Am I close?

    Most of these groups cannot be changed. Aspies are normallly the only ones who can be "taught" how to cope depending on the level of there disability. As you and I know there are as many types of Aspies as there are Aspies.

    The others for the most part cannot or will not accept change because they honest believe their world is the normal one.
    "Those who do not learn from history and condemned to relive it".

    "There are those who will debate the necessity of wilderness, I will not, either you know it in your bones or you are very very old". Aldo Leopold - Sand County Almanac

  7. #47
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    Re: Inability to understand love

    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Guerrilla View Post
    Well, that depends on your creation belief.
    If you're particularly religious, you'd likely believe that love was given by god and is (imo) more likely to be selfless.
    If you're not really religious, it's more likely that you could believe that love, came about because it furthers the continuation of humanity, a long term benefit, but a benefit none the less.
    I kinda mix them. I see the sociological motivation, but I also believe in a sort of collective sub/conscious that guides us. This collective will could be described as the sociological motivation, but I think it goes a little deeper than that and is more about personal revelation.

    How selfless it is? Not so sure.

  8. #48
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    Re: Inability to understand love

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfman24 View Post
    Most of these groups cannot be changed. Aspies are normallly the only ones who can be "taught" how to cope depending on the level of there disability. As you and I know there are as many types of Aspies as there are Aspies.

    The others for the most part cannot or will not accept change because they honest believe their world is the normal one.
    Actually, this thought did cross my mind but I did not want to claim it because how in the world do you verify this sort of thing? I sometimes wonder if I have a deeper understanding of human interaction because I spent 30 years studying it precisely because I have had to work so hard to interact with each other. I have had to get to the point where I can categorize human interaction into a model in order to understand it and know how to get people to do what I needed them to do or solicit whatever reaction I needed from them. Sometimes I screw up and do something perceived as odd, but that is pretty rare these days. I am perceived in RL as an all around awesome person by a variety of personalities. Doing so gives me some insight into the human psyche as a necessity.

    But again, how can I verify such a claim to others, so I avoided this piece of the discussion.

    Well met

  9. #49
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    Re: Inability to understand love

    Quote Originally Posted by ecofarm View Post
    I kinda mix them. I see the sociological motivation, but I also believe in a sort of collective sub/conscious that guides us. This collective will could be described as the sociological motivation, but I think it goes a little deeper than that and is more about personal revelation.

    How selfless it is? Not so sure.
    Well, I don't believe that humans are totally individuals.
    We are also a collective, in a sense.

    There is some balance between the two.
    Love developed, I believe, because it is both individually and socially beneficial.
    Whether or not, we get an instant chemical brain wash from loving activities.
    I was discovering that life just simply isn't fair and bask in the unsung glory of knowing that each obstacle overcome along the way only adds to the satisfaction in the end. Nothing great, after all, was ever accomplished by anyone sulking in his or her misery.
    —Adam Shepard

  10. #50
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    Re: Inability to understand love

    Quote Originally Posted by megaprogman View Post
    Actually, this thought did cross my mind but I did not want to claim it because how in the world do you verify this sort of thing? I sometimes wonder if I have a deeper understanding of human interaction because I spent 30 years studying it precisely because I have had to work so hard to interact with each other. I have had to get to the point where I can categorize human interaction into a model in order to understand it and know how to get people to do what I needed them to do or solicit whatever reaction I needed from them. Doing so gives me some insight into the human psyche as a necessity.

    But again, how can I verify such a claim to others, so I avoided this piece of the discussion.

    Well met
    Dr. Asperger once said "The delusional idea of a delusion is to try and explain it to the delusional."

    Does this make sense?

    They are there. They think there world is the right one. They will defend that belief as many of us would. Its just there way is not "socially acceptable". The trick is to just quietly ignore them and move on. For people like us this is a very hard thing to do. When I meet someone like that on thiis or any other site I leave myself a message so I don't get caught up. Not perfect but its better than nothing. When someone gets to the obnoxious point I put them on ignore.
    "Those who do not learn from history and condemned to relive it".

    "There are those who will debate the necessity of wilderness, I will not, either you know it in your bones or you are very very old". Aldo Leopold - Sand County Almanac

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