View Poll Results: Is it acceptable for the man to stay at home raising the kids while the woman works?

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  • Yes it is acceptable for the man to stay at home raising the kids.

    85 95.51%
  • No, the man that stays at home while the woman works is a lazy bum!

    4 4.49%
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Thread: Stay at home dads.

  1. #151
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    Re: Stay at home dads.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bodhisattva View Post
    I actually don't know what you mean when you say that is not what you would have suggested. It is just life. As a single parent what else am I supposed to do?
    You were actually supposed to be deposed by a younger male who then would eat your children. Don't you know anything about biology?!?!?
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  2. #152
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    Re: Stay at home dads.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tucker Case View Post
    You were actually supposed to be deposed by a younger male who then would eat your children. Don't you know anything about biology?!?!?
    When debating some people I find that I am a fairly stupid person... they know so much!
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  3. #153
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    Re: Stay at home dads.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bodhisattva View Post
    I actually don't know what you mean when you say that is not what you would have suggested. It is just life. As a single parent what else am I supposed to do?
    That is what you (hopefully) have family for. Parents, siblings, aunts, female cousins, etc....

    [edited for gender issue]
    Last edited by Tigger; 04-21-12 at 11:09 AM.

  4. #154
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    Re: Stay at home dads.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tigger View Post
    That is what you (hopefully) have family for. Parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, etc....
    Not uncles. They're men.


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  5. #155
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    Re: Stay at home dads.

    Quote Originally Posted by rocket88 View Post
    Not uncles. They're men.
    True. I was thinking more in the general situation of a single parent; so thanks for reminding me that we're really only focused on single men here.

  6. #156
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    Re: Stay at home dads.

    Quote Originally Posted by taxigirl View Post
    I do not see what staying at home and raising kids etc... has to do with gender other than it is a social construct. Men are perfectly capable just as women are perfectly capable of being the bread winners. The problem lies within the people who are making judgments.
    My judgment is your judgment is flawed. According to you men should feel free to wear dresses and high heels, what's the difference it's just clothes. My eyes are rolling out of my head here!

  7. #157
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    Re: Stay at home dads.

    Quote Originally Posted by sawyerloggingon View Post
    My judgment is your judgment is flawed. According to you men should feel free to wear dresses and high heels, what's the difference it's just clothes. My eyes are rolling out of my head here!
    I wear jeans and boots all the time. In fact - I wear jeans and boots without losing femininity while I do it. How do I manage? What makes my jeans and boots different than my husband's jeans and boots? Color and a tailored fit.

    When men think of wearing 'dresses' people usually think of doling up the feminine factor: dresses made for women showing cleavage, some skin at the waist, a cut for a feminine figure. . . and everything is extremely feminine: makeup - heels and all. This is what guys in the US think of when it comes to a 'dress' . . . If I were to try to dress up like a man I wouldn't wear clothing made to fit a woman or look femine.

    So - when I wear boots and jeans to work on the house they're made for my female figure. They might have some pink or blue - but overall they're utility and serve a purpose: to get dirty without getting completely trashed while allowing me to climb around, do heavy yardwork and crawl around under the house doing plumbing. They serve the same purpose = men wear these clothes for that same purpose. For me I have extra things to fuss over: I can't have my boobs dragging on the sewage strewn crawlspace floor - for example - and if I'm wearing a regular bra they're too 'out there' in the way.

    So: to the American Male mind: if a man 'wears a dress' he's trying to look like a female. But men all over the world wear 'dresses' - they're in the form of cultural clothing like kilts and thawbs (the traditional, long white 'dress' that men wear in some areas of the Middle East)

    Men do not have to be feminine to wear 'a dress' - it makes sense that the clothing serves a purpose - and gender-clothing is defined by colors and the way it's designed to fit.

    I don't look at a man in Thawbs or Kilt and think he's 'gay'

    I don't look at a woman wearing workboots and some work clothes to be 'a lesbian' either.

    The only reason why men in the US don't wear robes and 'dresses' is because our civilian cultural history sort of erased it out of our cultural history - leaving male 'dresses' in the US to purely be a religious thing: like my Dad and his sunday 'dress' - or the choir and their 'dress' - it's not a 'feminine dress' it's a 'religious dress' and doesn't denote gender: but has a status and purpose.

    Men in this country don't even dress like they use to 200 or 400 years ago. Have you become *more* masculine or something? No - male stereotypes have become *more* rigid.
    Last edited by Aunt Spiker; 04-21-12 at 12:04 PM.
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  8. #158
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    Re: Stay at home dads.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tigger View Post
    That is what you (hopefully) have family for. Parents, siblings, aunts, female cousins, etc....

    [edited for gender issue]
    In the best case scenario we would be married and she would be here for the kids... that isn't the case though. That does not mean that a man can't and shouldn't be there for and be able to do the same things that a woman can for the kids. Not at all...
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  9. #159
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    Re: Stay at home dads.

    To OP:

    This is nothing more than a product of feminism movement. Men have become so passive that they don't defend their women anymore, some feel the need to standout like girls, I know many cave to whatever manipulative command his girl says, some have become so spineless that they let their girl control their whole life. One of my friends on Facebook is always ooing and ahing over cars most men find "girly." It reminds me of all of the feminine products marketed to males. As a result, we have some females that 'in all sense' act like males. No offense to women, cause I love all of you, I don't think they were really built for the job to be masculine. I'm not saying that you can't, just it's not for most girls. This is one of the many things that make me want to leave this country.

  10. #160
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    Re: Stay at home dads.

    Quote Originally Posted by stsburns View Post
    To OP:

    This is nothing more than a product of feminism movement. Men have become so passive that they don't defend their women anymore, some feel the need to standout like girls, I know many cave to whatever manipulative command his girl says, some have become so spineless that they let their girl control their whole life. One of my friends on Facebook is always ooing and ahing over cars most men find "girly." It reminds me of all of the feminine products marketed to males. As a result, we have some females that 'in all sense' act like males. No offense to women, cause I love all of you, I don't think they were really built for the job to be masculine. I'm not saying that you can't, just it's not for most girls. This is one of the many things that make me want to leave this country.
    We're not talking about being masculine or being feminine, here - though.
    I'm feminine, my husband's masculine - but that's not the issue. . We're talking about parents caring for their children instead of paying someone else to do it: hence - stay at home parenting (mom or dad).

    I don't see why even gender-minded men would have a problem with it - my years of being a stay at home mom have put me in a very 'do guy stuff' position: I've remodeled the kitchen, done plumbing and electrical work, fixed the tractor (again and again), I do all the car stuff (changing breaks, the radiator, tire junk) - all that.

    In fact - the only thing feminine in my daily duties as a mom are all the mom stuff: dinner - cleaning. And parenting stuff is mutually accepted to be gender-non specific (punishments, school trips, etc - all that falls to whichever parent has the time. When my husband's on leave he does all that).

    Your view really speaks to what guys tend to think stay at home moms do. . . Well I do everything that needs to get done - my husband spends 50 some odd hours working / commuting and he's gone on the road dealing with military riffraff quite often. . . leaving me and the kids home, here, by ourselves. I've killed rabid dogs and coons without him around.

    I did not - do not - never will - just sit around play patty cake and giving raspberries all day.
    Last edited by Aunt Spiker; 04-25-12 at 10:56 AM.
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