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Is having sex with a passed out girl rape?

Is This Rape

  • Yes

    Votes: 61 95.3%
  • No

    Votes: 3 4.7%

  • Total voters
    64
Was the guy drunk too, because he may have not been able to understand what he was doing... If her alcohol consumption means she isn't responsible for the sex, then he isn't either.

If he's that drunk he wouldn't be able to get it up.
 
Girl meets guy for the first time. Girl gets drunk and passes out. Guy has sex with her. Girl plays it off and doesn't care.

Is this rape?

I'd say this is rape - but if she doesn't care then it doesn't matter.

Question 2: You've been seeing this girl (not exclusively) for about a month. She nonchalantly tells you about it but doesn't think it's a big deal and likens it to drunk sex. What do you do?

This is why my husband made a rule on our first day of dating that we would never talk about past sex-acts with others. . . and we've never broken that.

If he's that drunk he wouldn't be able to get it up.

Untrue - I'm not sure what percentages we're talking about - but a particular individual I'm married to never has 'a limit which inhibits' - more fun for me. He'll pass out before he loses it. I doubt he's the only one in the world who's this way.
 
Untrue - I'm not sure what percentages we're talking about - but a particular individual I'm married to never has 'a limit which inhibits' - more fun for me. He'll pass out before he loses it. I doubt he's the only one in the world who's this way.

Yeah, but that is probably because he's part horse. :lol:
 
It is
We do need a better people.
But the "man" should not boil in hell for this so-called indiscretion..
 
Yes, it is rape. If she doesn't or can't consent then anything sexual you may do to her is rape. It's no different than using a date rape drug imo.
 
You'd think smaller would be easier to get up. Less blood flow needed and all.

I think it's body chemistry/genetics - years of evolution all come down to my extreme benefit.

viva la Evolutione!!
 
I think it's body chemistry/genetics - years of evolution all come down to my extreme benefit.

viva la Evolutione!!

Well give yourself some credit too. You have to be appeasing in some manner to inspire.
 
Why is this a question?

It's rape.

Under my rule, rapists would forfeit their heads.
 
-- Was I raping her? By this definition in this thread, I guess. Was there intent to rape? Absolutely not.

And as married adults, you didn't take this into court because you discussed and sorted the issue between you. It would have been another story if you hadn't known each other long or weren't married.

--In drunken situations like this, how many guys are going to ask for verbal consent?

If a man gets (incapacitated) drunk, he probably isn't capable or co-ordinated. If he's mildly drunk he should still be able to tell the difference between a drunken partner and an unconscious one.


-- Can one interpret non-verbal actions as consent?

Depends on the scenario - if both parties are conscious, you can tell when consent is given non verbally just as you can when it's not. A woman doesn't have to say the word "no" otherwise rapists would simply learn to cover their victim's mouths up.
 
From what I understand this is rape in every state, however if she is not going to report it, it's like it never happened until she turn up with an STD or unwanted pregnancy, then Mr. Cool is screwed.
If she reports it in every state she is in more trouble. Mr. Cool is not even contacted.
 
Girl meets guy for the first time. Girl gets drunk and passes out. Guy has sex with her. Girl plays it off and doesn't care.

Is this rape?

Yes it is rape. Engaging in sexual intercourse without the consent of that persons is rape. She was passed out so she could not give consent. She is a moron for not pressing charges.
 
It is rape. The fact that she is playing it off is either because she has not come to terms with it, or is lying and knew full well that she was having sex with him and was afraid you would break-up with her for the indiscretion.
 
It is rape. The fact that she is playing it off is either because she has not come to terms with it, or is lying and knew full well that she was having sex with him and was afraid you would break-up with her for the indiscretion.

Why should it be? Maybe she was hot into him and would have said yes and had a damned good time if only she didn't have one too many? Maybe her only regret was that she wasn't lucid to enjoy it?

Don't put thoughts and feelings into the mouth and mind of a female whose been in such a situation. . . either way you're going with that - don't speak for someone else regardless of the situation.
 
It's not rape?

Fine. Let's get her drunk and have sex with her.

Yeah, it's totally not rape.

This issue angers me.
 
Question 2: You've been seeing this girl (not exclusively) for about a month. She nonchalantly tells you about it but doesn't think it's a big deal and likens it to drunk sex. What do you do?
RUN!! RUN AWAY NOW!!
I suspect that you won't, but you'll look back and remember that I told you so.
 
RUN!! RUN AWAY NOW!!
I suspect that you won't, but you'll look back and remember that I told you so.

I'm planning on breaking it off tonight, but offering her support in the case that she does need help either psychologically or in pursuing charges. I'm going to recommend her a therapist as well.

I wasn't able to sleep at all tonight and I've been feeling like throwing up all day. This is the worst thing that has ever happened to anyone I know and she doesn't even really seem to care. It's messed up.
 
Why should it be? Maybe she was hot into him and would have said yes and had a damned good time if only she didn't have one too many? Maybe her only regret was that she wasn't lucid to enjoy it?

Don't put thoughts and feelings into the mouth and mind of a female whose been in such a situation. . . either way you're going with that - don't speak for someone else regardless of the situation.

I was not aware that I was speaking for anyone other than my own assessment from the facts given. If she was not awake and never said that she wanted sex then she was raped. If she is not upset about it then she either did indeed want to have sex with the person in question or did so and lied about being passed-out, or she was indeed raped. There are no other possible options. Either way, if I were the OP I would be weary of maintaining a romantic relationship with her.
 
Why should it be? Maybe she was hot into him and would have said yes and had a damned good time if only she didn't have one too many? Maybe her only regret was that she wasn't lucid to enjoy it?

Don't put thoughts and feelings into the mouth and mind of a female whose been in such a situation. . . either way you're going with that - don't speak for someone else regardless of the situation.

Whoa! The act is rape. She was unconscious and unable to give consent. How she feels about it after the fact is a different matter.
 
Yes. She did not give permission. And for one who the hell would do this?
"Girl is asleep lets have sex with her"?
Yea that is rape.
 
My first instinct is to say this is rape, but there seem to be women who actually experienced such a situation and bizarrely do not have an issue with it. I don't see why I should prejudge a woman's consent or lack of consent based on what I think about it. However, I do think the man in question has all the personality traits of a rapist if he acted without prior consent, even if the alleged victim did not consider it rape herself.
 
I was not aware that I was speaking for anyone other than my own assessment from the facts given. If she was not awake and never said that she wanted sex then she was raped. If she is not upset about it then she either did indeed want to have sex with the person in question or did so and lied about being passed-out, or she was indeed raped. There are no other possible options. Either way, if I were the OP I would be weary of maintaining a romantic relationship with her.

Just cautioning - maybe she wasn't angry and not upset because *it wasn't upsetting* and *she wasn't emotionally tormented over it.* Some people just aren't negatively effected so much by things in life - rape, murder - what have you. . . where as some people are EXTREMELY upset over things and some are in the middle.

Doesn't mean they're trying to bull****, lie, or deny things - if you're not emotionally stirred then you're just not emotionally stirred.

Maybe she HAD isssues with it and dealt with that in her own way - people can move on.

But we're all interjecting, here.

OP - maybe you should be caring and concerning rather than judgmental and critical? Maybe she was a different person back then and has changed somehow and able to deal with issues better? One aspect of one evening doesn't sum up one individual nor should be a deal breaker for a possible future relationship.

If someone faces rape - regardless of how they felt about it or dealt with it - and that acts as a future problem in a relationshp down the road becaues of what *someone else* did to them - then isn't that punishing the victim for something that isn't their fault?

This is the reason why countless women don't report rapes - they're afraid of how others will treat them, they're afraid of being blamed or scrutinized.

Society says "yes, report!" but certain members of society make the victim feel like crap sometimes because of what happened to them. . . don't be one of those 'certain members'
 
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Just because there are women who think being black-out ****ed is no big deal, does not mean they are sane, or that you should try your luck.
 
Just because there are women who think being black-out ****ed is no big deal, does not mean they are sane, or that you should try your luck.

Oh sure - because that's an intricate part of being diagnosed as clinically insane.
And what is it when people judge one individual based on the actions of others around them?

I've had some pretty ****ed up situations go on with me involved - or just on the outside - and I don't care at all because *I've moved on* - physically, mentally, emotionally. I was a different person back then. . . apparently some people would rather me and others like me suffer endlessly and torment ourselves nightly instead. . . geesh! Why *can't* people move on and forget?

*edit: you know what - now that I'm thinking about it - maybe this girl needs to haul ass away from you, Khayembii Communique, because you're the one coming onto a forum, spreading her personal life, and debating how you should approach your relationship with her because of something someone else did to her in her past . . . perhaps that makes you untrustworthy and vile? Obviously you can't keep secrets.*
 
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