View Poll Results: If your partner cheats, will you stay?

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  • No, I'd end it

    23 39.66%
  • Yes, I'd stay. Period.

    3 5.17%
  • I'd stay conditionally

    15 25.86%
  • Don't know/not sure/not in a relationship/HOT POCKETS!

    17 29.31%
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Thread: Is an affair a dealbreaker

  1. #1
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    Is an affair a dealbreaker

    If a partner cheats, should the relationship/marriage end (in your estimation.)

  2. #2
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    Re: Is an affair a dealbreaker

    Coincidentally, my 16th wedding anniversary (and 3rd non) ended about seven minutes ago. For the first time since 2008, I didn't sob my way through it. Go, ME!

  3. #3
    Dungeon Master
    Veni, vidi, dormivi!

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    Re: Is an affair a dealbreaker

    Yes, it's a betrayal of trust.
    So follow me into the desert
    As desperate as you are
    Where the moon is glued to a picture of heaven
    And all the little pigs have God

  4. #4
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    Re: Is an affair a dealbreaker

    I should ask for more information. For instance, as a newlywed I would answer the same as you. When I wasn't married, I would say the same. Ten years in, and my tune started changing. Then there was equity, and we'd built something worth fighting for. Unfortunately, he didn't see it the same way. C'est la vie.

  5. #5
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    Re: Is an affair a dealbreaker

    I don't care if my partner is with someone else, as long as they tell me about it. We practice loving with detachment - that's our agreement. So for me, "cheating" would be my partner sleeping with someone and keeping it a secret. In that scenario, it would be the secrecy that destroys our relationship, not the act of being with someone else.

  6. #6
    Androgyne
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    Re: Is an affair a dealbreaker

    I would have voted yes, but I really like hot pockets. In essence, I've just cheated on my own moral code for cheap frozen pastries.

  7. #7
    Sage
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    Re: Is an affair a dealbreaker

    Quote Originally Posted by BDBoop View Post
    Coincidentally, my 16th wedding anniversary (and 3rd non) ended about seven minutes ago. For the first time since 2008, I didn't sob my way through it. Go, ME!
    I say go YOU as well. My best wishes from this day forward.

    In 39 years of marriage, I have never had the problem, so honestly I could not say what I would do. It seems to me however, that a person should try not to do anything brash and make the situation worse. I am sure there have been plenty of marriages and relationships that have survived an affair.

  8. #8
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    Re: Is an affair a dealbreaker

    Quote Originally Posted by Temporal View Post
    I don't care if my partner is with someone else, as long as they tell me about it. We practice loving with detachment - that's our agreement. So for me, "cheating" would be my partner sleeping with someone and keeping it a secret. In that scenario, it would be the secrecy that destroys our relationship, not the act of being with someone else.
    Same. I don't demand exclusivity, merely honesty (and I'm a real dick about that). My relationships generally end up monogamous, with occasional friends of hers visiting (I don't chase women). Wiping out the whole jealousy thing really makes life easier.

  9. #9
    Liberal Fascist For Life!


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    Re: Is an affair a dealbreaker

    For me, yes. For others, it's up to them. There is no concrete answer to this, and no "one size fits all" answer.
    We became a great nation not because we are a nation of cynics. We became a great nation because we are a nation of believers - Lindsey Graham

    Quote Originally Posted by Fiddytree View Post
    Uh oh Megyn...your vagina witchcraft is about ready to be exposed.

  10. #10
    global liberation

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    Re: Is an affair a dealbreaker

    Quote Originally Posted by pbrauer View Post
    I say go YOU as well. My best wishes from this day forward.

    In 39 years of marriage, I have never had the problem, so honestly I could not say what I would do. It seems to me however, that a person should try not to do anything brash and make the situation worse. I am sure there have been plenty of marriages and relationships that have survived an affair.
    I think most long-term marriages have survived infidelity. Truth is, all strong marriages are built with plenty of salt.

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