No, I'd end it
Yes, I'd stay. Period.
I'd stay conditionally
Don't know/not sure/not in a relationship/HOT POCKETS!
I don't really know how I would react if my husband cheated, but I lean toward staying and trying to work it out. The staying would depend on his willingness to actually want to work it out and what his extra-marital relationship brought into ours, i.e. emotional issues, diseases, psycho woman, etc.
My dad had most likely cheated on my mom at least once during their 20 years of marriage, but there really wasn't proof of it. I saw him kiss another woman when I was young, but did not want to hurt my mom by telling her. But my mom had her suspicions. My dad ended up leaving my mom with 4 children still at home, being picked up at the bus station by another woman that he brought over to my grandmother's house while my brother was there, blamed my mother, and her family, for everything, and got married to a different woman 4 days after their divorce was final. It hurt my mom and my father greatly regrets it now, 10 years later. I know that he would leave his wife in a heartbeat if my mother ever agreed to take him back, but she won't. The reason she won't is because of the blame he placed on her and her family, not the cheating or the leaving though.
I couldn't handle emotionally if my husband was using me to raise our kids and sleeping around. Nor could I stay if he picked up any STDs from his affairs.
I would not cheat on my husband because I saw how much my mom was hurt when my dad left. I don't want to hurt my husband in any way if I can avoid it and I don't want to be like my dad.
"A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt
Keep your religion out of other people's marriages.
I wasnt blaming the victim in any way shape or form. The fact that someone cheated is THEIRS to deal with, its their fault, its theirs to own, its theirs to fix, its theirs to not fix. Im sorry if i didnt express myself well enough.
Looking at ones relationship honestly and openly takes two parties working together. If one party doesnt want to admit that they ****ed up by stickin their parts where it didnt belong, or to blame that on the other person, they ARENT WORKING openly and honestly to fix their marriage, thus the marriage probably wont survive. People **** up in all sorts of ways... if we cant talk about that with each other and admit our failings.....BOTH parties, but especially the cheater because he or she is the one that threw marital issues aside and went elsewhere.
Last edited by BamaBrat; 06-24-11 at 12:00 PM.
Even if we didn't have children, adultery is a symptom, not the problem itself. Sure there would have been trust issues, and a long healing process to follow, but I wanted to address those problems instead of simply jumping ship.
The deal breaker for me was when she started hiding the children from me; a behavior she continues today, and is why there can be no reconciliation even if either of us were seeking it.
Now that the marriage is over, various friends and family feel the need to tell me about how my X would occasionally brag about how she always had boyfriends on the side, and how she would mock me for being 'innocent', trying to be the good husband and keep the faith.
Funny how people like to wait to tell you those things.....
Last edited by Jerry; 06-24-11 at 12:07 PM.
I always broke up with girlfriends who were unfaithful, but I could see a relationship surviving it. It would be a rare scenario, but not an impossible one.
Liberté. Égalité. Fraternité.