View Poll Results: Is cyber sex/sexting cheating

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  • Yes

    47 63.51%
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    8 10.81%
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    3 4.05%
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Thread: Is cyber sex/sexting "cheating"

  1. #31
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    Re: Is cyber sex/sexting "cheating"

    Quote Originally Posted by Redress View Post
    Let me tell you a story. This is all 100 % true. When I played Everquest, I was in a guild with a married couple. Awesome people, think the world of them. The wife of the bunch(played an incredible bard), had been in auto accident which left her in a wheelchair, not fully paralyzed, but unable to use her legs well enough to ever walk again. Her husband, who was also awesome, never wavered in his support of her.

    Life in a wheelchair caused her to quickly gain some weight, and she felt like much less than a whole woman. About all she could do during sex any more was lay there, her muscles would not coordinate enough that if she tried to move and respond, she would thrash about and make things worse. She started doing cybersex with a couple of the guys ingame, because it made her feel attractive and almost whole again. Her husband knew about it(they have computers in the same room), and not just accepted but encouraged her because it clearly made her happier. He told her as long as it just online, he didn't care, but no other guy was gunna touch her in real life.

    So you tell me, cheating or not? Right or wrong?

    By the way, as a side note: she has discovered computer generated art, and does artwork now based on fractals. Very successful, has done showings in multiple cities and sells a surprising amount of her art. They have two kids(boys) who also play games online and are just excellent, polite kids who often come across more mature than many of the adult gamers. Some of the most decent people I know, and it is a privilege to call them friends.
    Did the guys know her situation? Just curious.

  2. #32
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    Re: Is cyber sex/sexting "cheating"

    I don't think we here can determine if cybersex or sexting is cheating.. Alot depends on the relationship.. That being said.. All we can really say is would it be wrong for our relationships.. We don't know what kind of relationship Weiner has with his wife.. That is between him and his wife..

    Red: The couple you know sounds a lot like a couple I know.. But they play WOW.. I guess they could play both.. Still weird.. It would be freaky if it turned out to be the same couple..

  3. #33
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    Re: Is cyber sex/sexting "cheating"

    Quote Originally Posted by LuckyDan View Post
    Did the guys know her situation? Just curious.
    You know, I dunno. Probably not. I did not for the longest time. Then one night we had a multi hour talk and she just vented and explained and stuff.
    We became a great nation not because we are a nation of cynics. We became a great nation because we are a nation of believers - Lindsey Graham

    Quote Originally Posted by Fiddytree View Post
    Uh oh Megyn...your vagina witchcraft is about ready to be exposed.

  4. #34
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    Re: Is cyber sex/sexting "cheating"

    Quote Originally Posted by celticwar17 View Post
    borderline swingers
    Borderline swingers and people who don't take their vows seriously are good answers, but this is becoming a very common thing, and my guess is there is rarely permission sought beforehand. In those cases, it is certainly a form of cheating.
    Last edited by LuckyDan; 06-07-11 at 12:58 AM.

  5. #35
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    Re: Is cyber sex/sexting "cheating"

    The comment about vows: different people have different expectations about what their "vows" mean. A couple who have the understanding that affairs are ok, but be discrete and don't catch anything, are they not taking their vows serious if that is their mutual agreement? I am very old fashioned about marriage. However, I don't expect others to hold the same ideals of marriage as I do.
    We became a great nation not because we are a nation of cynics. We became a great nation because we are a nation of believers - Lindsey Graham

    Quote Originally Posted by Fiddytree View Post
    Uh oh Megyn...your vagina witchcraft is about ready to be exposed.

  6. #36
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    Re: Is cyber sex/sexting "cheating"

    Quote Originally Posted by Redress View Post
    You know, I dunno. Probably not. I did not for the longest time. Then one night we had a multi hour talk and she just vented and explained and stuff.
    Got it. I ask because it occurs to me that, if an emotional bond was formed, or felt on the part of one of the guys, then there may have been some deception on her part - not of her husband, but of the other guy.

    Look I'm no saint, I'm just saying, this stuff is like playing with fire. People get hurt, and not just the ones in the marriage.

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    Re: Is cyber sex/sexting "cheating"

    Quote Originally Posted by LuckyDan View Post
    Got it. I ask because it occurs to me that, if an emotional bond was formed, or felt on the part of one of the guys, then there may have been some deception on her part - not of her husband, but of the other guy.

    Look I'm no saint, I'm just saying, this stuff is like playing with fire. People get hurt, and not just the ones in the marriage.
    People get hurt when they have unrealistic expectations. Every one also knew that her and her husband where sitting within a few feet of each other at the time, and every one knew she was devoted to her husband and vice versa.
    We became a great nation not because we are a nation of cynics. We became a great nation because we are a nation of believers - Lindsey Graham

    Quote Originally Posted by Fiddytree View Post
    Uh oh Megyn...your vagina witchcraft is about ready to be exposed.

  8. #38
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    Re: Is cyber sex/sexting "cheating"

    Quote Originally Posted by Redress View Post
    People get hurt when they have unrealistic expectations. Every one also knew that her and her husband where sitting within a few feet of each other at the time, and every one knew she was devoted to her husband and vice versa.
    All well and good, then. I can't argue against individual anecdotes. On any topic.

  9. #39
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    Re: Is cyber sex/sexting "cheating"

    It bothers me that the woman felt she needed other men besides her husband to make her feel "whole" again. I tend to think she only felt that way because the men didn't know she couldn't walk so it was a fantasy for her.

    Doesn't matter to me, though. If I had an emotional or physical bond with another man whether it be online or off, I would be cheating on my husband.

    Just curious....did the husband do the same as his wife?


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    Re: Is cyber sex/sexting "cheating"

    If someone goes to a strip club once for a bachelor party or some type of guys night out... and gets a really hot lap dance, then goes home and makes passionate love to his wife... That's not cheating.

    But if someone goes to a strip club weekly, spending the grocery money... I'd say there's a problem.

    Wiener had 6 of these online flings? Was it taking away from time at work? Was it taking away from time at home? Was he looking to take if farther?

    He didn't break the law, but it's hard to say if he broke is vows.

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