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Do you fear happiness ?

Do you fear happiness ?

  • Total voters
    17
No, but I understand what you're asking.



There was a time, in the past, when happiness made me nervous... I wondered if really deserved it, and feared it would be taken from me suddenly.


Since then ... well I've learned some things. I take each day as it comes and if there is any happiness to be found in it, big or small, I wallow in it and enjoy it to the uttermost, and am thankful for it.
 
Goshin said:
No, but I understand what you're asking.



There was a time, in the past, when happiness made me nervous... I wondered if really deserved it, and feared it would be taken from me suddenly.


Since then ... well I've learned some things. I take each day as it comes and if there is any happiness to be found in it, big or small, I wallow in it and enjoy it to the uttermost, and am thankful for it.
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Yep and the quest begins with understanding what happiness is. In the beginning it isn't so obvious. From a supersized McDonald's meal to Ford trucks to diamond rings we are bombarded with crap that is purposely equated with happiness. But if those things make us truly happy the happiness is fleeting.

My kids always used to beg me to play the lotto. I told them to find one TV commercial that said winning the lotto will make you happy and I'd buy 10 tickets. Of course they couldn't find a TV commercial that said that. I told them that the commercials said the lotto can make your rich, but the commercials never said the lotto would make you happy.

True and lasting happiness comes from within and as you said, Goshen, happiness often comes in small things. When we have the right attitude we are more likely to notice.

"Fenced yards ain't hole cards and like as not they never will be." ~ Jerry Jeff Walker
 
Risky Thicket said:
Yep and the quest begins with understanding what happiness is. In the beginning it isn't so obvious. From a supersized McDonald's meal to Ford trucks to diamond rings we are bombarded with crap that is purposely equated with happiness. But if those things make us truly happy the happiness is fleeting.

My kids always used to beg me to play the lotto. I told them to find one TV commercial that said winning the lotto will make you happy and I'd buy 10 tickets. Of course they couldn't find a TV commercial that said that. I told them that the commercials said the lotto can make your rich, but the commercials never said the lotto would make you happy.

True and lasting happiness comes from within and as you said, Goshen, happiness often comes in small things. When we have the right attitude we are more likely to notice.

"Fenced yards ain't hole cards and like as not they never will be." ~ Jerry Jeff Walker
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however, if I'm going to be UNhappy, I'd rather be rich and unhappy than poor and unhappy

just saying...:cool:
 
Why on earth would I fear being happy?
 
I'm terrified of happiness. I'm always happy when I'm miserable.
 
Sometimes I think people fear being content more than happiness. Happiness is a transient state. It is very difficult to nearly impossible to be truly happy all the time. Why is it wrong to settle for content, and treasure those times when you are happy? Seems that you might have more happy times if you are okay with just being content.
 
roguenuke said:
Sometimes I think people fear being content more than happiness. Happiness is a transient state. It is very difficult to nearly impossible to be truly happy all the time. Why is it wrong to settle for content, and treasure those times when you are happy? Seems that you might have more happy times if you are okay with just being content.
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You sound like one of those people over in Carrboro. ;)
 
roguenuke said:
Sometimes I think people fear being content more than happiness. Happiness is a transient state. It is very difficult to nearly impossible to be truly happy all the time. Why is it wrong to settle for content, and treasure those times when you are happy? Seems that you might have more happy times if you are okay with just being content.
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You sound like one of those people over in Carrboro. ;)
 
Yes, of certain varieties. Not much I can do about it short-term. I've taken quite a few shots to the head during all of the most important years of my life thus far, and it'll just have to be something I sort out over time.

Do I let that stop me? Nope. I'm good at barrelling ahead even in the middle of a panic.

It's annoying, as it means I am sometimes distracted from enjoying my happiness as much as I could. But it gets better all the time, and the more times I just ignore it.
 
SmokeAndMirrors said:
Yes, of certain varieties. Not much I can do about it short-term. I've taken quite a few shots to the head during all of the most important years of my life thus far, and it'll just have to be something I sort out over time.

Do I let that stop me? Nope. I'm good at barrelling ahead even in the middle of a panic.

It's annoying, as it means I am sometimes distracted from enjoying my happiness as much as I could. But it gets better all the time, and the more times I just ignore it.
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Tell it, Smoke. It begins with attitude. Our attitude attracts what we see. It isn't always easy and some days we keep looking in the mirror to see if we have a "Kick me" sign on our backs. On those days it is particularly hard to get your mind right. But I have found that if I tweak my attitude just a little bit some little thing will sneak in and bring me a tiny bit of happiness. From there it gradually gets better.

Attitudes can't be taught, they have to be caught.
 
Risky Thicket said:
Tell it, Smoke. It begins with attitude. Our attitude attracts what we see. It isn't always easy and some days we keep looking in the mirror to see if we have a "Kick me" sign on our backs. On those days it is particularly hard to get your mind right. But I have found that if I tweak my attitude just a little bit some little thing will sneak in and bring me a tiny bit of happiness. From there it gradually gets better.

Attitudes can't be taught, they have to be caught.
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Yeah. It's work. I'm fortunate that my attitude seems to always be pretty much the same, and my attitude is a stubborn one that's always reaching for things. Small favors...

Of more variability for me is how I'm seeing myself. That tends to be the deal-maker in what I attract. I've gotten pretty good at keeping that in check as well though.

It's just a matter of de-progamming that lizard brain response that tells me when something seems good, trouble lurks below. That's a long, slow process of observing reality proving me wrong over and over and over again. But in order to work, you have to give reality the chance.

My intuition is good. Near-perfect, in fact. It's a challenge sometimes to listen to it, when the lizard brain says trouble is waiting. But when I do, reality proves me wrong. And I do pretty consistently these days.
 
Medusa said:
maybe they think it will be taken from them
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I think that's a reasonable observation of a form of thinking engaged in by a lot of folk.

And...

It may be more akin to not being able to trust a particular state of being (like happiness) to last or fear it'll cease to be - for whatever the reason. So one form of irrational thinking (a defense mechanism) would be to avoid or sabotage THINGS or PERSONS (relationships) that produce "feelings" like happiness, or a sense of well being, or love... :shrug:
 
SmokeAndMirrors said:
Yeah. It's work. I'm fortunate that my attitude seems to always be pretty much the same, and my attitude is a stubborn one that's always reaching for things. Small favors...

Of more variability for me is how I'm seeing myself. That tends to be the deal-maker in what I attract. I've gotten pretty good at keeping that in check as well though.

It's just a matter of de-progamming that lizard brain response that tells me when something seems good, trouble lurks below. That's a long, slow process of observing reality proving me wrong over and over and over again. But in order to work, you have to give reality the chance.

My intuition is good. Near-perfect, in fact. It's a challenge sometimes to listen to it, when the lizard brain says trouble is waiting. But when I do, reality proves me wrong. And I do pretty consistently these days.
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When I can't think my way into acting right...sometimes I have to act my way into thinking right.
 
Removable Mind said:
I think that's a reasonable observation of a form of thinking engaged in by a lot of folk.

And...

It may be more akin to not being able to trust a particular state of being (like happiness) to last or fear it'll cease to be - for whatever the reason. So one form of irrational thinking (a defense mechanism) would be to avoid or sabotage THINGS or PERSONS (relationships) that produce "feelings" like happiness, or a sense of well being, or love... :shrug:
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Good point. Later today, after posting here, I thought about this thread and how many times I kinda fear not being happy again. Content is fine, better than the alternative, but there is that lingering thought (fear?).
 
Alyssa T. said:
Good point. Later today, after posting here, I thought about this thread and how many times I kinda fear not being happy again. Content is fine, better than the alternative, but there is that lingering thought (fear?).
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F=Future

E=Events

A=Appearing

R=Real

Think about it. Fear is usually in future tense. It's about "potential loss" of something or someone. In the dead face of fear, we are in total clutches accessing a potential loss. The reaction can vary.
 
Silly OP. I fear comfort, love, excellent health and financial security and that evil monkey under my bed.
 
rhinefire said:
Silly OP. I fear comfort, love, excellent health and financial security and that evil monkey under my bed.
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who doesnt like these ? lets be polite and logical
 
I fear the consequences of happiness.

because for some people, they like to be happy by stomping down other people.

And there are always unforseen other consequences.
 
Removable Mind said:
F=Future

E=Events

A=Appearing

R=Real

Think about it. Fear is usually in future tense. It's about "potential loss" of something or someone. In the dead face of fear, we are in total clutches accessing a potential loss. The reaction can vary.
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A lot of fear is also based on past bitter experience. Such as people who have experienced racism, intolerance, and bigotry.
 
Ancient Herald said:
A lot of fear is also based on past bitter experience. Such as people who have experienced racism, intolerance, and bigotry.
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Certainly previous experiences can be a stimulus for setting up a sense of fear, which is the belief one will sustain a future loss of some kind. The human mind is a fast processor of information. The future might be be 5 seconds away.
 
Removable Mind said:
Certainly previous experiences can be a stimulus for setting up a sense of fear, which is the belief one will sustain a future loss of some kind. The human mind is a fast processor of information. The future might be be 5 seconds away.
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....4....3....2....1....0 :mrgreen:
 
Removable Mind said:
Certainly previous experiences can be a stimulus for setting up a sense of fear, which is the belief one will sustain a future loss of some kind. The human mind is a fast processor of information. The future might be be 5 seconds away.
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Yeah but tomorrow will never arrive because it's always a day away.

:mrgreen:
 
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