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Kid with My Little Pony backpack told to leave it at home

Superfly

Superfly

Salty, defiant, and completely non-compliant.
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School bans 9-year-old boy's My Little Pony backpack

This is just wrong. Instead of fixing the problem, they are blaming the victim.

"He didn't want to get out of the car because kids were being really mean," his mom, Noreen Bruce, told USA TODAY Network. She decided to get the school counselor involved, but didn't get the help she expected.
"One of her suggestions was to hide it," Noreen Bruce said. "She said that if you have something like this you're asking for trouble." Later, the principal called and told her to keep the backpack at home.
Bruce didn't agree: "I said, 'You're missing the picture here. You're telling him that it's OK for them to make fun of him."
The bullying was so bad that Grayson was afraid to go back to school. "One kid told him to go home to kill himself," she said. "Things I can't believe 9-year-olds are saying to each other."
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If anyone can think of a way to stop children being bullies, please suggest it, because that's what the school is acknowledging. Children will bully, and the kid was making a target of himself. I'm not saying it's ok, merely that it's inevitable.
 
Superfly said:
This is just wrong. Instead of fixing the problem, they are blaming the victim.
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How do you know it was instead of addressing the bullies rather than as well as. The rights and wrongs of the actual situation are one thing but leaping to such conclusions on the basis of an obviously one-sided, reactionary article is fundamentally flawed.

Remember that USA Today don't care about children being bullied, they care about their website getting hits.
 
spud_meister said:
If anyone can think of a way to stop children being bullies, please suggest it, because that's what the school is acknowledging. Children will bully, and the kid was making a target of himself. I'm not saying it's ok, merely that it's inevitable.
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How about punishing the bullies instead of the victim? If someone is bullying someone else, PUNISH THEM. Sheesh, all these damn schools are talking about "We are a BULLY FREE ZONE !!11!" and yet when someone is bullied, they sweep it under the rug. If someone is bullying, give them ISS, or take away recess, or something. They have to know that bullying is not OK.
 
HonestJoe said:
How do you know it was instead of addressing the bullies rather than as well as. The rights and wrongs of the actual situation are one thing but leaping to such conclusions on the basis of an obviously one-sided, reactionary article is fundamentally flawed.

Remember that USA Today don't care about children being bullied, they care about their website getting hits.
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I don't give a **** about USA Today or anything else, Joe. They are just the ones reporting the story. It could have come from Billy Bob's Weekly World News for all I care.

All I see is that the school is blaming the victim instead of rectifying the problem. Instead of asking the kid to leave his backpack at home, they should have brought all the kids in who are bullying him, and remedied that situation instead of this kid having to stay home and be homeschooled. Seriously? 9 year olds telling other kids to just kill themselves?
 
spud_meister said:
If anyone can think of a way to stop children being bullies, please suggest it, because that's what the school is acknowledging. Children will bully, and the kid was making a target of himself. I'm not saying it's ok, merely that it's inevitable.
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I hate to agree with this but sadly teachers and staff can only do react to this when they see it. Aside from having an adult with this kid 24/7, he will be bullied. Yes punish the bullies when you catch them, explain to all how bullying is wrong but to expect them to be able to stop it all is rather naïve. If it is just 1 kid bullying another it is much easier to deal with as you can keep the two separate or supervise them more when not. It is also easier to identify and punish. I know of several people who's kids were in this situation and the schools were able to resolve it. This article makes it apparent it is many kids doing the bullying which greatly increases the difficulty for the staff, yes they should try to stop it but often the attempts will just lead to more bullying (johny needs mrs teacher to protect him nany nany poo poo) when the adults aren't there to see it. Hope the kid overcomes this.
 
Superfly said:
I don't give a **** about USA Today or anything else, Joe.
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So you don't care whether what is being reported is actually true or complete? You're just going to fill in all the gaps from your own imagination and rant about what you want to believe happened? Well I'll leave you to it then.
 
This was a 9 year old boy, is that right? Why would he be carrying a Little Pony backpack if it wasn't for attention? This sounds like a lawsuit set-up to me. 9 year old boys pretty much run with the herd and do what the other 9 year old boys do. Other 9 year old boys don't carry little pony backpacks.

I don't think this amounts to bullying as much as just teasing a kid for doing something so unusual. Sort of like getting a bad haircut and taking a ribbing for it from your friends.

If it is true that this was the boy's idea; having mommy come to his rescue is only going to make things worse. I wonder where dad is in all of this?
 
If he's being made fun of because of his backpack and that's the only reason, doesn't not bringing the backpack make sense as a solution? If I'm aware I'm going to get **** for, say, wearing something with the Dallas Cowboys logo, then it kinda becomes my choice to take the **** if I choose to wear it, yes?
 
Those people that are complaining about the school's solution to the problem apparently have forgotten what school was like and how bullies operate. If the bullies are collectively punished, they will (more likely than not) collectively punish the boy who likes to bring girlie things to school.

Besides, this is a good example of how the new culture in America is trying to be the mother of everyone and make sure no one is offended, picked on or left out. The glaringly obvious downfall to that approach is eventually the pampered and overly-protected youths reach adulthood and leave (hopefully) the confines of their parent's house and enter the real world. Under this new approach, they will be completely unprepared for the daunting world that lies before them because they won't always have mommy and daddy there to protect them from all of the evils in the world they'll encounter on their way through life. Basically, we're allowing the creation of a generation of ******s.
 
HonestJoe said:
So you don't care whether what is being reported is actually true or complete? You're just going to fill in all the gaps from your own imagination and rant about what you want to believe happened? Well I'll leave you to it then.
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See, now that is not what I said at all. I implied that I didn't care about the source that you seemed to be so interested in. I cared about the story - not where it came from.
 
I have to say that I am more than a little shocked at the "blame the victim" mentality going on here. This child, little boy or not, 9 years old or not, has the right to carry this backpack if he wants to, without being bullied by a bunch of mouth breathers.
 
Jango said:
Those people that are complaining about the school's solution to the problem apparently have forgotten what school was like and how bullies operate. If the bullies are collectively punished, they will (more likely than not) collectively punish the boy who likes to bring girlie things to school.

Besides, this is a good example of how the new culture in America is trying to be the mother of everyone and make sure no one is offended, picked on or left out. The glaringly obvious downfall to that approach is eventually the pampered and overly-protected youths reach adulthood and leave (hopefully) the confines of their parent's house and enter the real world. Under this new approach, they will be completely unprepared for the daunting world that lies before them because they won't always have mommy and daddy there to protect them from all of the evils in the world they'll encounter on their way through life. Basically, we're allowing the creation of a generation of ******s.
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I was bullied when I was in 7th grade. It sucked but I knew it was my problem to deal with. It would have been really embarrassing to me to tell my parents or teachers what was happening. Eventually, after a few dozen fights or so, it stopped and things got a lot better and I learned I never wanted to treat someone like that.
 
Superfly said:
I have to say that I am more than a little shocked at the "blame the victim" mentality going on here. This child, little boy or not, 9 years old or not, has the right to carry this backpack if he wants to, without being bullied by a bunch of mouth breathers.
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I really wonder, with all the press now over bullying, if we're doing picked on kids any favors by constantly assuring them what delicate little victims they are.
 
Superfly said:
See, now that is not what I said at all. I implied that I didn't care about the source that you seemed to be so interested in. I cared about the story - not where it came from.
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My point is that the nature of the story - it's accuracy, honesty and spin - will be determined by the source. Differently sources telling the same story based on the same raw information can present it in an entirely different manner (and in the media, often do). If you want a full understanding of the actual situation being depicted (including understanding all the elements we simply don't and can't know), you need to consider the source as well as what they actually report.

Even the same report can lead different people to leap to different conclusions. While you've taken the line that the school failed to address the actual bullying, others in the thread have suggested that the mother engineered (or at least exaggerated) the dispute in preparation for suing the school. Both conclusions involve reading assumptions in to the situation which simply aren't supported by the raw facts presented. Either could be correct, but that would be more luck than judgement.
 
X Factor said:
I was bullied when I was in 7th grade. It sucked but I knew it was my problem to deal with. It would have been really embarrassing to me to tell my parents or teachers what was happening. Eventually, after a few dozen fights or so, it stopped and things got a lot better and I learned I never wanted to treat someone like that.
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I too was bullied, but in the 6th grade. I took care of my own problem because I hit a growth spurt over the summer.
 
Jango said:
I too was bullied, but in the 6th grade. I took care of my own problem because I hit a growth spurt over the summer.
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I think that it's a common experience and I think too many people forget what it was really like and how running to teacher doesn't usually help. The teacher cannot be everywhere at once.
 
Superfly said:
I have to say that I am more than a little shocked at the "blame the victim" mentality going on here. This child, little boy or not, 9 years old or not, has the right to carry this backpack if he wants to, without being bullied by a bunch of mouth breathers.
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He certainly does have a right to carry his backpack, but what he cannot control is how others will react to him. Now, I can understand being upset when children (or adults) are bullied for things they cannot help, like their looks or because they are poor or whatever, but this child has a choice. He can bring the backpack and put up with the treatment or leave it at home. Like others have said, you cannot expect everyone to protect you from cruelty your whole life. It's something you have to learn how to deal with. Now, if the kids are "beating him," then that's another story entirely, then those children should be punished harshly, but you cannot regulate what others think and feel about the little boy who chooses to carry a My Little Pony backpack to school. He MUST know he's going to catch hell for it.
 
ChrisL said:
He certainly does have a right to carry his backpack, but what he cannot control is how others will react to him. Now, I can understand being upset when children (or adults) are bullied for things they cannot help, like their looks or because they are poor or whatever, but this child has a choice. He can bring the backpack and put up with the treatment or leave it at home. Like others have said, you cannot expect everyone to protect you from cruelty your whole life. It's something you have to learn how to deal with. Now, if the kids are "beating him," then that's another story entirely, then those children should be punished harshly, but you cannot regulate what others think and feel about the little boy who chooses to carry a My Little Pony backpack to school. He MUST know he's going to catch hell for it.
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Exactly. I should be able to go to work today with quarters and dimes taped to my face and not be harassed for it. Would I be? Of course.
 
X Factor said:
I think that it's a common experience and I think too many people forget what it was really like and how running to teacher doesn't usually help. The teacher cannot be everywhere at once.
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Exactly. 'Snitches get stitches or wind up in ditches' IMO, if at all possible, it's best to let the kid(s) take care of themselves at school. That's how it generally worked when I was in school. But, the downfall nowadays is that instead of some fisticuffs or a clever humiliating prank the kids are shooting each other with guns they stole from their parents.
 
Wear it proud and defend yourself (ie tell the other kids to **** off because my little pony is awesome) or if you are bothered by the taunting and don't want to defend yourself, leave it at home. That's what I'd tell my kid if she was being bullied. Actually that is exactly what I tell her - if someone says something mean tell them to shut up because they are just mad they don't have it or if they hit her, hit them right back. I would not encourage her though to leave the backpack at home, rather stand up for what she likes and believes in.
 
X Factor said:
Exactly. I should be able to go to work today with quarters and dimes taped to my face and not be harassed for it. Would I be? Of course.
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LOL! Where did THAT come from? Something you've been contemplating? :lol:
 
americanwoman said:
Wear it proud and defend yourself (ie tell the other kids to **** off because my little pony is awesome) or if you are bothered by the taunting and don't want to defend yourself, leave it at home. That's what I'd tell my kid if she was being bullied. Actually that is exactly what I tell her - if someone says something mean tell them to shut up because they are just mad they don't have it or if they hit her, hit them right back. I would not encourage her though to leave the backpack at home, rather stand up for what she likes and believes in.
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And then when your kid gets his/her ass kicked? Then what? Then it's the school's fault?
 
Superfly said:
School bans 9-year-old boy's My Little Pony backpack

This is just wrong. Instead of fixing the problem, they are blaming the victim.
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#1: School should address the bullying issues (suspension, etc)
#2: If the kid isn't brave enough to handle the response that will come from stepping out and being whatever then tell the kid to leave the backpack at home.

That's what I would have done - because #1 will never nip it completely. If you go 'against the flow' and so on you must toughen up. It doesn't matter what it is. Life Lesson: Want to be a trendsetter? Get rugged.

The whole 'but can't we all get along' is great, but not realistic. If you want to be different and do things that most people will dissaprove of you need to understand that requires a hefty dose of 'I don't give a **** - I'll do it anyway.'
 
ChrisL said:
LOL! Where did THAT come from? Something you've been contemplating? :lol:
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I'm tired of not being able to find change for the vending machines. :D
 
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