Thread: for those active or former active military

Originally Posted by cpwill

...well.... probably alot of what we would have called pranks really were just abuse....

but also alot of little things. You'd be amazed how many people will go for impressive lengths of time without noticing that their rank is upside down.

Even better, when you put SgtMaj rank insignia on the back of some LCpls collar.

had a Gunny who desperately wanted MSgt. had no idea how all those damn diamonds kept showing up on his collar, day after day after day....

Originally Posted by cpwill

...well.... probably alot of what we would have called pranks really were just abuse....

but also alot of little things. You'd be amazed how many people will go for impressive lengths of time without noticing that their rank is upside down.

I had mine removed from my class A jacket. Funny. I did not realize it until much later. I still have a picture of me, an Army Captain with my railroad tracks missing.

My final prank in the Army was double-parking in the Post CSM and Post Commanders spot at HQ. Some piece of **** 2003 Cavalier I got for 500 bucks and used for driving around post. Wish I could have been there to see their faces... or not.

I was just remembering one that CP might recognize.

When I was a young grunt, one of the traditions was to make sure that all the Marines were "E-tool qualified". During their first field exercise, we would take them towards the end and ask them if they had been E-tool qualified yet (the E-tool is the folding shovel we all use). We explain to them that in close quarters combat, the E-tool can make a deadly weapon (true), and they should be familiar with how to use it.

We generally have them hit a log with it a few times, urging them to hit it harder and harder. Normally their cap would fall off, so we would tell them to just take it off and do it again. After they get soem good hits, we tell them they need to be able to hit a quarter 3 times. Afte they do that, it is the time for the final test. We tell them they have to do it at night, so blindfold them. And with much encouragement, they will start hacking away at that log while blindfolded.

On which we had just placed their field cap.

At the end of their first field exercise, most first timers come back with a cap that looks like it was run over with a lawnmower. But nobody would say anything about it, since it was considered a "rite of passage". They tried it on me, but I was already a Corporal. When the Lance blindfolded me, I turned the E-tool around, hitting it with the back of the tool. Reset, do it again, I again flipped it. I then said "I may be a boot to this unit, but I am not a total boot."

I asked my Army unit if they did any such thing, and they had never heard of it. I proposed doing it, but my Platoon Leader and Platoon Sergeant said "No way". They were afraid of getting "blown up" if higher-ups saw their Soldiers wearing mangled covers.

Originally Posted by Oozlefinch

I asked my Army unit if they did any such thing, and they had never heard of it. I proposed doing it, but my Platoon Leader and Platoon Sergeant said "No way". They were afraid of getting "blown up" if higher-ups saw their Soldiers wearing mangled covers.

Hell no, you know us Army guys have to look pretty at all times. A spec of dirt on your boots, and it's WWIII. Us mechanics could never catch a break.

LOL - now this one I can tell: My husband pood in a water fountain once (eons ago) - it sat there for 2 days while he razzed everyone over who pood in the fountain and deprived everyone of priviliges until the owner of the poo came forward and admitted it - eventually, with no perpetrator stepping forward, he just fished it out of the fountain on his own much to the gross amazement of the guys.

Mean I tell you!

I was a drill instructor on Parris Island. Makes for some great stories:
-We used to take the Chocolate sports bar from the MRE's (looks like a terd) and put it in the toilet. Then, while the platoon was making a head call (going to the latrine for you hooah's), one of us would go fish it out of the toilet with our bare hands in front of all of them. We would hold it up in front of the platoon and scream "Who's is this?! Who didn't flush?!". Of course no one would fess up. Then, with them still looking, one of us would take a bite of it, scream some random recruits name out, and say "Smith, I knew this was yours! Get on the quarterdeck!"
-After taps everynight, I would have the first recruit on watch lock me in my wall locker while I was fully dressed. I would have Dress Charlies on (short sleeve khaki shirt) standing straight up in the locker, and he would lock the combo lock on the outside of the door. There's no way out of the wall locker from the inside. Then, I would have a hat (that's what we call each other) from another platoon come down and unlock it to get me out. I would sleep in the bed that night. The next morning, I would get up early and have the same hat lock me back in the wall locker. The last watch would come in, unlock the door, and I'd come out screaming like I never went to sleep.
-We sleep with the lights on in the "duty hut". I would stand a martial arts dummy up in front of the window in the duty hut, put my campaign cover on him, and use a metal hanger to hold the blinds apart a little. That way it looked like I was up all night peeking out the blinds at the recruits while they slept.
-I would put a recruit on first watch that was built similar to me. I would put on cammies with no nametapes and unblouse my boots so I looked like a recruit. I would then yell at him to get in the duty hut. While he was in there, I would put his H-harness on and take his red flashlight (that's what our watch's wear at night). After that, I would yell "Get out!" and jump out of the door. That way it looked like it was me throwing the recruit out but in reality it was me flying out. So now, all of the recruits think I am a recruit. I would walk around the squad bay at night and go sit on other recruits beds that were talking after taps. They knew my voice so I couldn't talk loud or they'd know it was me. I would sit there and talk to them for like 10 minutes, let them say how much they hated me. One kid said he would kill me if he had the chance lol. Then, I would take the cover off, shine the red light on my face and just scream like a horror movie. I'm laughing typing this! Those kids would have a look like they just saw a ghost. They looked like the people off of "The Ring". It was hilarious.

One of are marines was bragging what about,his motorcycle. So one day we notice that,he didn't lock the steering wheel. So we moved into a connex box ( I still had my forms when I was a PMO MP) filled them out to look like his bike had been impunded. It took him three hours and a trip to the desk sergnant to figure out we did.

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prank that went wrong but it made me laugh for a long time.

In mess qrts on base one of the lads had a pet tarantula in his room, new lad moved in who hated spiders with a passion so obviously we all thought it would be funny to send him into this lads room. The lad with the spider was in on it and he let the spider out of his cage and he told the new lad to wait in his room for him and they would have a couple of pre game beers before we hit the town. So the lad goes into his room and about 10 mins later we here a scream and then he comes running out of the room very white faced. He then says " Lads you would not believe what ive just seen, a ****ing massive spider looked like a tarantula crawl from underneath your bed Rawson...dont worry though I got the bastard" at which point he shows us the bottom of his boot". At that point we all start pissing outself laughing and our boy Rawson also goes white and nearly tears up.