Thread: Battered Mother Accused in Child's Death

Originally Posted by samsmart

Except this woman is 21 years old. Which means she likely doesn't even realize that this is an option to her. And she likely doesn't have a whole lot of life skills either.

A lot of battered women are also forced into being dependent on their abuser. And it's not just physical abuse either - they get hit with emotional and mental abuse too.

This woman doesn't need to be imprisoned. Rather, she needs counseling and a social worker to help her be independent.

That's not legitimate excuse. Ignorance of the law doesn't mean that the government cannot try you for a crime anyway. They certainly can. Depending on how long this was going on (meaning that there were beatings before the one which claimed the child's life), than through her own inaction she endangered that child and ultimately kept him in an environment that caused his death.

Originally Posted by samsmart

Except this woman is 21 years old. Which means she likely doesn't even realize that this is an option to her. And she likely doesn't have a whole lot of life skills either.

A lot of battered women are also forced into being dependent on their abuser. And it's not just physical abuse either - they get hit with emotional and mental abuse too.

This woman doesn't need to be imprisoned. Rather, she needs counseling and a social worker to help her be independent.

Hogwash. I was 17 the first time. Second time I was 20. It isn't rocket science that if the guy that supposedly says he loves you AND his son, then begins to hit them, it isn't love and to get the hell out of there.
There is no excuse for any woman, or mother, to rely on anyone except HERSELF. I refuse to colorcoat it or cry on her stupidity.

Originally Posted by Enola

She didn't get up off her butt and haul that kid out of there. Makes her an accessory in my opinion. First time a guy raised his hand to me, he wound up eating it and I was out of there. Second one that tried it and I had our son by then...he wound up nursing a sore skull from my fist pounding him while he was shaving.

Don't hit a woman or a child and then turn your back. Or go to sleep. Bad idea.

She should have left. No place to go? Then walk. And keep walking until you find a safe place. NEVER stay where your child is being beaten.

I don't know about this particular situation, because, as usual, we really don't have enough information. But battered woman syndrome is very real. Look it up. You are quite obviously not the type of person who would tolerate such a thing...you have a healthy psyche...women who stay with abusers are damaged. Doesn't make it right. Doesn't mean a mom is any less accountable and responsible to her child. Just means that there is a very real thought process that causes it. Those like you (and me) whose motto is "Hey, he's gotta' sleep some time," aren't the targets of these guys. It's a really sick relationship they have. I think it may sort of be akin to the Stockholm Syndrome.

Battered women often have choices, especially in today's world where there are often shelters available and family courts which will easily award Orders of Protection. That's not to say that what happens to them is ok, but whatever psychological issue causes them to continue going back to their abuser is no excuse for jeopardizing the lives of children, IMO.

Originally Posted by ksu_aviator

That's complete and utter horse ****.



It is wrong to punish the mother for her boyfriend's actions, but this b.s. line that the government is also to blame is just stupid.

He wasn't blaming the death of the child on the government..

Originally Posted by samsmart

Except this woman is 21 years old. Which means she likely doesn't even realize that this is an option to her. And she likely doesn't have a whole lot of life skills either.

A lot of battered women are also forced into being dependent on their abuser. And it's not just physical abuse either - they get hit with emotional and mental abuse too.

This woman doesn't need to be imprisoned. Rather, she needs counseling and a social worker to help her be independent.

I think you have some good points. This situation is very tragic, and I'd prefer to see the young woman empowered and given a real chance at life as opposed to being tossed in prison and ****ed up even more. Most importantly, she deserves a fair trial. I am not sure how much her guilt is in the crime itself, but I'd say her knowledge or lack thereof should be considered by the jury.

Originally Posted by samsmart

Except this woman is 21 years old. Which means she likely doesn't even realize that this is an option to her. And she likely doesn't have a whole lot of life skills either.

A lot of battered women are also forced into being dependent on their abuser. And it's not just physical abuse either - they get hit with emotional and mental abuse too.

This woman doesn't need to be imprisoned. Rather, she needs counseling and a social worker to help her be independent.

It isn't the state's responsibility to teach this woman anything. There are countless woman's shelters in DFW that will allow you to stay for free, so long as you contribute to the shelter in some way (i.e. chores). This woman had options, but instead stayed and allowed her boyfriend to kill her child. At the least, she is guilty of neglect.

Originally Posted by HonestJoe

There seems to be a whole load of people here leaping to all sorts of extreme conclusions on the basis of ridiculously minimal information (you can barely justify calling that news).

The assumptions that the woman was too ignorant or naive to get out of a violent situation or that the government failed to provide the necessary support are no more justified that the assumption she bares some of the responsibility for the death of the child.

I personally give the police the benefit of the doubt unless evidence if provided otherwise - I don't see them arresting here is there wasn't something to the suggestion that she failed to do something that could have prevented the killing. Thankfully, the courts will decide on the basis of a full review of all the relevant evidence rather than random denizens of the internet on a knee-jerk reaction to a three paragraph report.

Because the police are not capable of knee jerk reactions themselves, right? If we just entrusted everything to the police and government, there wouldn't be anything called a jury in our legal system. The knee jerk reactions should be sorted out and put aside at the trial and this woman will be ultimately judged by a jury of her peers and not the police.

Originally Posted by Krhazy

Battered women often have choices, especially in today's world where there are often shelters available and family courts which will easily award Orders of Protection. That's not to say that what happens to them is ok, but whatever psychological issue causes them to continue going back to their abuser is no excuse for jeopardizing the lives of children, IMO.

It could be dependence on their abuser, his control and possessiveness over their lives, and/or they falsely believe that they have control over how violent he gets... if they do this and that, he won't hit or abuse them... if they keep him happy enough, everything will be fine.

Originally Posted by Krhazy

Battered women often have choices, especially in today's world where there are often shelters available and family courts which will easily award Orders of Protection. That's not to say that what happens to them is ok, but whatever psychological issue causes them to continue going back to their abuser is no excuse for jeopardizing the lives of children, IMO.

Battered women often has choices, yes. But they may not be aware of their choices.

I mean our school system doesn't really do a good job of educating people on all the social services available to them, or where to go to find out. So while there may be services, they could be unknown to a lot of people.

That's something I would actually like done - make education and information regarding social services easier for people to learn about and use.