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My Plan to End Wild Fire and Drought (An End to Wild Fire and Drought!)

I once saw a bumper sticker that read:

"Due to a lack of wood and paper products, wipe your ass with a Spotted Owl."

I live my life to that every day.

We'll dress you up and make you use water.
 
Cocaine's a hell of a drug.

I hope you don't mind me bringing up this thread. I checked the weather this morning and it's raining in California! This is an example of how just talking about the process will make it rain. You can thank me later. The California Governor hasn't replied to me. Maybe I should write Governors of Texas, Nevada and Arizona next.

Tried cocaine about six or seven times. I was very careful to not get addicted. Tried peyote once, just a little piece, I could hear the coyote panting but I didn't have the space to really try it out. Done mushrooms about eight times. I was preparing my body nutritionally to do some more mushrooms but I got old, no, I just don't have my life together enough for mushrooms and there's no mushrooms on my horizons to get my life together for. I would just have to look at the same old human wretchedness that I've already been there and done that for. I took LSD eighteen times and the final time I nearly translated out of this world. I was surprised to find that I could get out so soon, only seven years after attending some nutritional seminars and embarking on my study of mystic yoga. This was Christmas eve 1992. I decided I would not do any more LSD unless I wanted to leave this world. Even now If I took two hits of LSD I could probably translate out but the stuff is so harsh. I can hardly believe I used to do this. All these substances including hemp make your behavior erratic, are hard to control as a habit and can negatively affect your work and school work affecting the amount of money you can earn. They're good for sick people and sorcerers.
 
I hope you don't mind me bringing up this thread. I checked the weather this morning and it's raining in California! This is an example of how just talking about the process will make it rain. You can thank me later. The California Governor hasn't replied to me. Maybe I should write Governors of Texas, Nevada and Arizona next.

Tried cocaine about six or seven times. I was very careful to not get addicted. Tried peyote once, just a little piece, I could hear the coyote panting but I didn't have the space to really try it out. Done mushrooms about eight times. I was preparing my body nutritionally to do some more mushrooms but I got old, no, I just don't have my life together enough for mushrooms and there's no mushrooms on my horizons to get my life together for. I would just have to look at the same old human wretchedness that I've already been there and done that for. I took LSD eighteen times and the final time I nearly translated out of this world. I was surprised to find that I could get out so soon, only seven years after attending some nutritional seminars and embarking on my study of mystic yoga. This was Christmas eve 1992. I decided I would not do any more LSD unless I wanted to leave this world. Even now If I took two hits of LSD I could probably translate out but the stuff is so harsh. I can hardly believe I used to do this. All these substances including hemp make your behavior erratic, are hard to control as a habit and can negatively affect your work and school work affecting the amount of money you can earn. They're good for sick people and sorcerers.

I am very sorry for that post.

Here, I’ll cover it up with another drought ending discourse.

How do I like to end my drought?

I just need a couple of you to follow me on this; four, one in each corner of the Rocky Mountains next spring.

In the spring when you look out and there’s not a cloud in the sky and you say this could never work you go out and spray your hose so that it rains. Then a little while later you look up in the sky and see some moisture so you go out and spray the hose some more, knowing if you didn’t those clouds would just go away and you begin to see clouds heading your way and soon you feel droplets.

It doesn’t take very long; a couple of days, weeks, hours.

Or I could just order up on you like people do to me.

I have to order rain though, and who wants that?

I want people to use my method. That would give me the most gratification.

Ok, I’ll just order it up. Rain. We want rain. All around the Rockies all crowded with clouds and raining but not too much to flood.

All the water that the wild fire fighters are spraying can just go up into the vapor bubble that brings rain.

We need more people working the method.
 
Why isn't this post in the comedy section?
 
[h=2] Megadroughts in past 2000 years worse, longer, than current droughts[/h]
[h=3]What hockeystick eh?[/h] A new atlas shows droughts of the past were worse than those today — and they cannot have been caused by man-made CO2. Despite the claims of “unprecedented” droughts, the worst droughts in Europe and the US were a thousand years ago. Cook et al 2015[SUP][1][/SUP] put together an old world drought atlas from tree rings data as a proxy for summer wetness and dryness across Europe. They compare the severity and timing of European droughts with the North American Drought Atlas (NADA) released in 2004. Yes, it’s a tree ring study with all the caveats about how trees are responding to several factors at once etc etc. But at least the modern era is measured with the same proxy as used in the old eras.
Something else is causing droughts, something modern models don’t include:
“megadroughts reconstructed over north-central Europe in the 11th and mid-15th centuries reinforce other evidence from North America and Asia that droughts were more severe, extensive, and prolonged over Northern Hemisphere land areas before the 20th century, with an inadequate understanding of their causes.”
The worst megadrought in the California and Nevada regions was from 832 to 1074 CE (golly, 242 years). The worst drought in north-central Europe was from 1437 to 1473 CE, lasting 37 years.
Climate models don’t predict any of the droughts below, and all of them occurred before 99% of our emissions were released.
Authors compare results from the new atlas and its counterparts across three time spans: the generally warm Medieval Climate Anomaly (1000-1200); the Little Ice Age (1550-1750); and the modern period (1850-2012).
The atlases together show persistently drier-than-average conditions across north-central Europe over the past 1,000 years, and a history of megadroughts in the Northern Hemisphere that lasted longer during the Medieval Climate Anomaly than they did during the 20th century. But there is little understanding as to why, the authors write. Climate models have had difficulty reproducing megadroughts of the past, indicating something may be missing in their representation of the climate system, Cook said.
Figure 3A Maps from a new 2,000-year drought atlas show rainfall conditions over the whole continent, and much of the Mediterranean. A chart for 1741 shows severe drought (brown areas) running from Ireland into central Europe and beyond. A chart for the year 1315 shows the opposite problem—too much rain (dark green areas), which made farming almost impossible. (Cook et al., Science Advances, 2015)

A large part of the Northern Hemisphere is included in the study.
Figure 4B

The worst droughts:
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