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Bondage

the makeout hobo

the makeout hobo

Rockin' In The Free World
DP Veteran
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Sacramento, CA
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Political Leaning
Slightly Liberal
So my (completely wonderful) girlfriend and I are getting into bondage. We've talked a lot about it, and our relationship, and trust, and all that fun stuff. We've experimented with arm restraints, and a Dom/sub dynamic manifested very quickly in our relationship. This is the first time either one of us has really explored these things, and we've been talking about things like collars and other bdsm gear. Any advice to a couple getting into bdsm, from the dirty perverts we have on this forum?;)
 
Safe word. First priority. Pick one now, something easy. Something you would never say normally during the act. Like "Red" (stop signs, stop lights).
 
rivrrat said:
Safe word. First priority. Pick one now, something easy. Something you would never say normally during the act. Like "Red" (stop signs, stop lights).
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We set one of those up a few days ago. "Vindaloo", since it'll never come up. We had a bit of an issue where I was teasing, and didn't realize she wanted me to stop, so we set one up. Any other advice?
 
the makeout hobo said:
Any advice to a couple getting into bdsm, from the dirty perverts we have on this forum?;)
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Try a book. Forum advice will be brief, typically lack illustrations, and have a lot of bias.
An example:
[ame=http://www.amazon.com/101-Realistic-Introduction-Jay-Wiseman/dp/0963976389]Amazon.com: SM 101: A Realistic Introduction (9780963976383): Jay Wiseman: Books[/ame]

I'd read up first. Then get the basics. Maybe a crop, some rope lengths (hardware store), some velcro cuffs, a hood, a blindfold, an assortment of dildos and egg vibrators, nipple clips, maybe a gag and dog collar, a jug of alcohol for cleanup. More exotic stuff just costs more time, money, and could probably be improvised for nearly the same effect (or better) anyway. Plan plenty of time and be safe.
 
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Ok, whoever picked rivrrat in the "who would be the first response in this thread" DP pool message me for your spoils.

And don't complain about the payout. You knew the odds going into it.
 
Do not lose the handcuff keys.

Seriously.
 
Goshin said:
Do not lose the handcuff keys.

Seriously.
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Also, don't buy cheap handcuffs from the sex toy store. I had a pair get stuck on my wife's wrist, even WITH having the key. It took 30 minutes and a hacksaw to get it off. She was NOT a happy camper.
 
the makeout hobo said:
So my (completely wonderful) girlfriend and I are getting into bondage. We've talked a lot about it, and our relationship, and trust, and all that fun stuff. We've experimented with arm restraints, and a Dom/sub dynamic manifested very quickly in our relationship. This is the first time either one of us has really explored these things, and we've been talking about things like collars and other bdsm gear. Any advice to a couple getting into bdsm, from the dirty perverts we have on this forum?;)
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So who is this woman? I remember your asking advice about sleeping/dating several women at the same time. Are you and bondage woman (;)) exclusive now? :)
 
aps said:
So who is this woman? I remember your asking advice about sleeping/dating several women at the same time. Are you and bondage woman (;)) exclusive now? :)
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Well in theory it's an open relationship, but I agreed to wait a while before taking advantage of that, to make sure she's comfortable in the relationship first. This one's new, we met online when I posted an ad for an evil henchwoman.
 
Gipper said:
Ok, whoever picked rivrrat in the "who would be the first response in this thread" DP pool message me for your spoils.

And don't complain about the payout. You knew the odds going into it.
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I win. :mrgreen:
 
I had a Chick into all that stuff. I can't be bothered. To much trouble just to get off. forget about it. It don't feel that good.
 
And, just because every bondage household ought to have a copy on their coffee table:

[ame="http://www.amazon.com/Seductive-Art-Japanese-Bondage/dp/1890159387"]The Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage - By Midori[/ame]

This is a serious book, and beautiful too. It has a bibliography for more book suggestions. My copy is autographed :)
 
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rivrrat said:
Cat-o-nine tails. Get one.

Over the door restraints = awesomeness

Under the mattress restraints = awesomness





Okay, I was bound up like that for a photo shoot, and it's NOT seductive.
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LOL. It may not be your thing, or it may be because you were doing a photo shoot (or both). Some people like odd things, or exotic, or new, as I'm sure you know.

She was a speaker and gave lessons at an all weekend, very public, event that some people and I organized. We also had an awesome fetish fashion show where she did a really cool bondage thing in like 10 seconds or something. It's been many years ago, now, but I remember having alot of respect for her knowledge, artistry and sense of fun.

The event was great, we had classes, art exhibitions, vendor booths, etc, but we kept it from being a freak show. We brought people together from all the different 'alternative lifestyles' for a weekend of public exposure. The thinking was that there are alot of people out there that are shameful of their eccentricities, and they shouldn't be. We were right in our thinking that lots of people wanted to know more, and just didn't know where to get started.

Photo shoot? Now you've done it. People are going to demand pictures.
 
rivrrat said:
Cat-o-nine tails. Get one.

Over the door restraints = awesomeness

Under the mattress restraints = awesomness





Okay, I was bound up like that for a photo shoot, and it's NOT seductive.
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She has a loft bed- the bed is actually above her closet, you need a ladder to get up to it. We're planning on putting some eye ring hooks on the frame;)

She also got bored and made a flail out of rope, so we'll see how that works.
 
Dezaad said:
LOL. It may not be your thing, or it may be because you were doing a photo shoot (or both). Some people like odd things, or exotic, or new, as I'm sure you know.

She was a speaker and gave lessons at an all weekend, very public, event that some people and I organized. We also had an awesome fetish fashion show where she did a really cool bondage thing in like 10 seconds or something. It's been many years ago, now, but I remember having alot of respect for her knowledge, artistry and sense of fun.

The event was great, we had classes, art exhibitions, vendor booths, etc, but we kept it from being a freak show. We brought people together from all the different 'alternative lifestyles' for a weekend of public exposure. The thinking was that there are alot of people out there that are shameful of their eccentricities, and they shouldn't be. We were right in our thinking that lots of people wanted to know more, and just didn't know where to get started.
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To each their own, for sure. I've just watched it being performed in a group setting at a regional burn and didn't find it appealing myself. And, then allowed someone to do it me for a fetish photo shoot, and again... not so much fun. LOL

I realize some folks get a kick out it, though.

Photo shoot? Now you've done it. People are going to demand pictures.
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Rightwing86 said:
pics or it didn't happen! :) I had too!
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You can see my boobies so I'd probably get banned if I posted a link to them.
 
Skateguy said:
I had a Chick into all that stuff. I can't be bothered. To much trouble just to get off. forget about it. It don't feel that good.
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You sure sound like a very artful and skilled lover:roll:
 
the makeout hobo said:
We set one of those up a few days ago. "Vindaloo", since it'll never come up. We had a bit of an issue where I was teasing, and didn't realize she wanted me to stop, so we set one up. Any other advice?
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Yeah, don't get Indian food on the same night.
 
Kali said:
You sure sound like a very artful and skilled lover:roll:
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It is not my job to try to make other people happy. Any more than it is their job to make me happy---unless I pay them. Which works out just fine for me.
 
Skateguy said:
It is not my job to try to make other people happy. Any more than it is their job to make me happy---unless I pay them. Which works out just fine for me.
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Sex and love should be feedback loops, I really don't think you get it.
 
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