School outed teen to parents, said it was ‘legally obligated’: lawsuit

[Cold Highway]

Two softball coaches at a Texas high school are being sued after allegedly confining a teenaged girl in a locked room, forcing her to confirm her sexual orientation, then outing her to her parents before ejecting her from the softball team.

The lawsuit states that the school district defended the actions by saying the teachers were "legally obligated" to inform the parents of the child's sexuality.

Where the **** do they get the idea that the school has to inform the parents if she is a lesbian or not? I hope these dirt bags get royally ****ed over.

School outed teen to parents, said it was ‘legally obligated’: lawsuit | Raw Story

 

[roughdraft274]

Where the **** do they get the idea that the school has to inform the parents if she is a lesbian or not? I hope these dirt bags get royally ****ed over.

School outed teen to parents, said it was ‘legally obligated’: lawsuit | Raw Story

I really hope they get fired over this.

 

[liblady]

Where the **** do they get the idea that the school has to inform the parents if she is a lesbian or not? I hope these dirt bags get royally ****ed over.

School outed teen to parents, said it was ‘legally obligated’: lawsuit | Raw Story

wow....incredible.

 

[Whovian]

"Fletcher asked SW if she was gay, and accused her of having a sexual relationship with another girl. She also claimed that SW was spreading gossip about this other girl being 'Coach Newell’s girlfriend," the lawsuit states

When SW denied these accusations, Fletcher and Newell reacted angrily. Fletcher stepped in close to SW and began yelling at her, threatening to sue her for slander and demanding that she “stop lying.” Newell also made menacing gestures. SW was very afraid, and feared they might strike her. This behavior went on for a few minutes.

I think this indicates the probable reasons for the coaches actions. It would seem to me that they were not acting out of some sense of obligation to uphold some policy or law, but because they were pissed at accusations being spread about one of the coaches. In other words... they were being bitchy.

 

[Aunt Spiker]

Ok - I see two different things going on here.

1) How they confronted her - this is wrong and they should be fired for it - a charge of assault and false imprisonment - very harsh charges. She, also, shouldn't have been kicked off the team - everything that they did was wrong.

2) Informing the parents of her orientation - though they acted like some douches - I feel that this subject is a necessity the same as informing your parents of anything else that happens to you while you're at school and away from your parents.

On this issue of informing - it should be in the form of a discussion and out of concern for the student - not out of "let's get them in trouble" as if they've done something wrong.
I have 4 children - and if the school knew something about them that I didn't know - I'd be hurt, at the least, if I eventually found out something. Especially in this day and age where bullying of lesbian and gay students is becoming more common and more detrimental. When some students have committed suicide over these issues it's in large part because their parents weren't involved, didn't care - or didn't even know - and gave no support or help at all.

So - why shouldn't the parents know?
As we all are becoming aware - often time sexual orientation issues can lead to serious social, emotional and other personal problems and it's up to the school to bring these concerns up to the parents or at least see if the parents are supportive and seeking help.

The school IS suppose to be concerned for the students wellbeing - they provide counseling and they intervene often with other issues. If you care for a child for 8-10 hours of the day you are a caregiver and it's your responsibility to keep the parents informed and involved WITH the ongoings of said child while the parents and children are separated.

So this part doesn't bother me - it's HOW they treated this girl that DOES bother me and IS a major problem. But the fact that they told the parents - though they should have done things completely different - is not an issue.

Why does this upset everyone else - as if a parent no longer has the right to know what's going on with their kids?
Is everyone assuming the parents won't be caring, loving and supporting?

I know I would - and I'd much rather be able to talk to my kids about ANYTHING that they're dealing with as opposed to everyone else railroading them mentally while they're suppose to be in math class.

 

[Whovian]

AS... my concern in regards to the informing is... does the school actually have the legal right to do so? What law were they following? Is 'inform child's parents if child is thought to be gay' actually in the law?

I don't think the school actually has a legal obligation, or right, to interfere in something so personal. It's between the children and the parents... no one else.

 

[Aunt Spiker]

AS... my concern in regards to the informing is... does the school actually have the legal right to do so? What law were they following? Is 'inform child's parents if child is thought to be gay' actually in the law?

I don't think the school actually has a legal obligation, or right, to interfere in something so personal. It's between the children and the parents... no one else.

I'm not saying they are legally required.
But they have a moral obligation out of the concern of the student to discuss anything that might be of the parent's concern.

Schools are legally required to support suspected child abuse, sickness, and troublesome behavior - but you don't expect them to discuss other areas of concern at all?

That makes no sense to me - I should hear the good AND the bad about my kids while they're students - as long as I am overall responsible for their health and well being they are completely my business and nothing should be a secret.

But in a reasonable and concerned way - not in some stupid phone call after such a ridiculous and humiliating chain of events which likely caused her more embarrassment than anything else might have.

 

[MaggieD]

Where the **** do they get the idea that the school has to inform the parents if she is a lesbian or not? I hope these dirt bags get royally ****ed over.

School outed teen to parents, said it was ‘legally obligated’: lawsuit | Raw Story

While I think the coaches' actions were outrageous, I don't think it rises to the level of a winnable civil lawsuit. Criminal? Maybe so. It sounds as if the girl was unlawfully detained. The truth is a complete and total defense for slander. If the girl admitted she was gay, there is no harm nor foul to the coaches revealing this information to the girl's mother. There is no presumption of confidentiality in the law between coaches and students. Lawsuit outa' gas.

If the DA sees fit to charge the two coaches with unlawfully detaining her and they're found guilty, then I could see a winnable suit on that basis. But for revealing she's gay?? In what country??

 

[Whovian]

I'm not saying they are legally required.
But they have a moral obligation out of the concern of the student to discuss anything that might be of the parent's concern.

Schools are legally required to support suspected child abuse, sickness, and troublesome behavior - but you don't expect them to discuss other areas of concern at all?

That makes no sense to me - I should hear the good AND the bad about my kids while they're students - as long as I am overall responsible for their health and well being they are completely my business and nothing should be a secret.

But in a reasonable and concerned way - not in some stupid phone call after such a ridiculous and humiliating chain of events which likely caused her more embarrassment than anything else might have.

I'm not sure I'd place 'suspected homosexuality' on the same level as suspected child abuse, sickness, and troublesome behavior.

 

[CaptainCourtesy]

Legally, the school has no reason to report this. The child is not in danger or harming themselves. Beyond the legalities, there is also no reason to inform the parents. If a child wants a parent to know about their sexuality, it is their place to say, not the school's. There is nothing dangerous happening, so, though I don't think there is anything litigious, what those teachers did was unnecessary.

As a therapist, if a teenage client tells me that they are gay, no way will I inform the parent. I may tell the teen that it would be a good idea to inform them and help them to do so, but there may be very good reasons why the teen would not want their parents to know. This would be the same if the teen told me they were sexually active.

The teachers were absolutely wrong in this case.

 

[Partisanhack]

Ok - I see two different things going on here.

1) How they confronted her - this is wrong and they should be fired for it - a charge of assault and false imprisonment - very harsh charges. She, also, shouldn't have been kicked off the team - everything that they did was wrong.

2) Informing the parents of her orientation - though they acted like some douches - I feel that this subject is a necessity the same as informing your parents of anything else that happens to you while you're at school and away from your parents.

On this issue of informing - it should be in the form of a discussion and out of concern for the student - not out of "let's get them in trouble" as if they've done something wrong.
I have 4 children - and if the school knew something about them that I didn't know - I'd be hurt, at the least, if I eventually found out something. Especially in this day and age where bullying of lesbian and gay students is becoming more common and more detrimental. When some students have committed suicide over these issues it's in large part because their parents weren't involved, didn't care - or didn't even know - and gave no support or help at all.

So - why shouldn't the parents know?
As we all are becoming aware - often time sexual orientation issues can lead to serious social, emotional and other personal problems and it's up to the school to bring these concerns up to the parents or at least see if the parents are supportive and seeking help.

The school IS suppose to be concerned for the students wellbeing - they provide counseling and they intervene often with other issues. If you care for a child for 8-10 hours of the day you are a caregiver and it's your responsibility to keep the parents informed and involved WITH the ongoings of said child while the parents and children are separated.

So this part doesn't bother me - it's HOW they treated this girl that DOES bother me and IS a major problem. But the fact that they told the parents - though they should have done things completely different - is not an issue.

Why does this upset everyone else - as if a parent no longer has the right to know what's going on with their kids?
Is everyone assuming the parents won't be caring, loving and supporting?
I know I would - and I'd much rather be able to talk to my kids about ANYTHING that they're dealing with as opposed to everyone else railroading them mentally while they're suppose to be in math class.

That's exactly what I'm assuming.

 

[Aunt Spiker]

I'm not sure I'd place 'suspected homosexuality' on the same level as suspected child abuse, sickness, and troublesome behavior.

I'm not saying they're all the same thing - they are, however, ALL parental concerns which is my point.
If anything - no matter what it might be - happens with someone's child the parents have a right to know about it - don't they?

Are parents only suppose to be talked to if their kids have done something wrong these days?

Why is being a parent such a bad thing these days?

That's exactly what I'm assuming.

Well please don't.
If my kids were homosexual I'd want to be the involved middle-man to protect them from others who might pick on them, bully them and hold them out of things.

If the girl in the OP were my child I'd go to great lengths to see the perpetrators paid for their crime and that my daughter received whatever support, care and love she needed after such an aweful situation.

 

[Partisanhack]

I'm not saying they're all the same thing - they are, however, ALL parental concerns which is my point.
If anything - no matter what it might be - happens with someone's child the parents have a right to know about it - don't they?

Are parents only suppose to be talked to if their kids have done something wrong these days?

Why is being a parent such a bad thing these days?



Well please don't.
If my kids were homosexual I'd want to be the involved middle-man to protect them from others who might pick on them, bully them and hold them out of things.

If the girl in the OP were my child I'd go to great lengths to see the perpetrators paid for their crime and that my daughter received whatever support, care and love she needed after such an aweful situation.

I applaud you, but let's be honest: this is Texas. If I were a gay teenager in the Bible belt, being outed to my parents is not something I would roll the dice on. Telling her parents is not something anyone should do for any reason unless they're really damn sure that the parents would have a positive attitude.

 

[roguenuke]

This is BS and they all know it. Those coaches need to be fired and anyone who defended their actions, including the disclosure, should be at the very least disciplined if not fired as well.

There is not one rule (that I can find) in any of their policies that says that they are required to reveal a student's sexuality to the student's parent(s). In fact, there are several that mention a student's privacy should be maintained to the greatest extent and one that specifies that an employee should not be using threats of calling a student's parent to coerce them during an "interrogation".

http://www.tasb.org/policy/pol/private/092902/pol.cfm

 

[Whovian]

I'm not saying they're all the same thing - they are, however, ALL parental concerns which is my point.
If anything - no matter what it might be - happens with someone's child the parents have a right to know about it - don't they?

Are parents only suppose to be talked to if their kids have done something wrong these days?

Why is being a parent such a bad thing these days?

Certainly a parental concern. But they did not tell her mother out of 'concern'. It looks more like they did it to get back at her. Is THAT a lesson you want to teach a child? That it's OK to do that out of anger?

Actually, no. Parents do not NEED or have a right to know every single thing about their children. Would you read your daughters diary if she happened to leave it unlocked on time? There are some things that it is acceptable to keep private, until the child decides it's time to tell the parent. That's how I raised my children, and all 3 are turning out to be happy, healthy and well adjusted members of society.

Being a parent is a great thing, in these or any other day. I think the fundamental difference here is that you seem to feel the need/right to know everything about your child, and that they deserve no privacy. I say that based on your comments in this thread only.

Just as an aside, I have a serious moral problem with homosexuality. I feel it is morally wrong. However, I do not press that opinion onto anyone else, as I do not feel it is my place to judge them as people. That's between them and whatever deity the believe in.

 

[Aunt Spiker]

I applaud you, but let's be honest: this is Texas. If I were a gay teenager in the Bible belt, being outed to my parents is not something I would roll the dice on. Telling her parents is not something anyone should do for any reason unless they're really damn sure that the parents would have a positive attitude.

So you're actually saying that, because of where they live, they should assume her parents will be against her?
Geesh man - what ARE parents these days - meaningless, worthless, the worst things to happen to kids in this day and age or something?

It's a shame to realize that most people assume parents knowing things would be a bad thing - I guess your parents didn't care too much.

Mine certain didn't - I ended up in some very dangerous and difficult situations in life because they minded my privacy and individuality TOO MUCH. Parents shouldn't be so removed that their own kids refuse to come to them for anything. Parents should be strong, supportive and ALWAYS there no matter what.

If most parents aren't like this then perhaps they need to check theirselves.

 

[roguenuke]

So you're actually saying that, because of where they live, they should assume her parents will be against her?
Geesh man - what ARE parents these days - meaningless, worthless, the worst things to happen to kids in this day and age or something?

It's a shame to realize that most people assume parents knowing things would be a bad thing - I guess your parents didn't care too much.

Mine certain didn't - I ended up in some very dangerous and difficult situations in life because they minded my privacy and individuality TOO MUCH. Parents shouldn't be so removed that their own kids refuse to come to them for anything. Parents should be strong, supportive and ALWAYS there no matter what.

If most parents aren't like this then perhaps they need to check theirselves.

For something like this, I believe that it is something that children should be allowed to tell parents in their own time. Not all parents are supportive of this and even if they are, they certainly will feel hurt to have to hear about it from someone else besides their child. It is not fair to either the parent or the child to reveal such a thing, especially out of vindictiveness.

 

[CaptainCourtesy]

For something like this, I believe that it is something that children should be allowed to tell parents in their own time. Not all parents are supportive of this and even if they are, they certainly will feel hurt to have to hear about it from someone else besides their child. It is not fair to either the parent or the child to reveal such a thing, especially out of vindictiveness.

Yup. This is on target.

 

[digsbe]

I find the treatment of this student was abusive. The school had no right to disclose the students sexual orientation to their parents. A student's sexuality is none of their business or responsibility. Coming out of the closet is a serious decision for homosexuals. It's not right to violate this students privacy and force them to disclose their sexual orientation when they are not ready. If the parents were to be told at all, it should have been done by the student in accordance with the student's will. These teachers had no right to lock this girl in a room and force her to disclose of her sexuality. This is abusive, a breach of privacy, none of their business, and potentially psychologically and emotionally damaging to the girl.

 

[Catz Part Deux]

So you're actually saying that, because of where they live, they should assume her parents will be against her?

I think that when it comes to matters of personal sexuality, young people should be allowed to discuss these issues with their parents on their own terms, and school officials shouldn't be in the middle of what is essentially a private matter.

I have a 17-year-old. If I'm doing my job as a parent, she's going to tell me what's going on with her. If I'm not, it's not the schools job to remedy this. If my child is breaking the rules of the school, or is committing what would be a criminal act, or is causing disruption, or is being victimized in some way, the school needs to tell me.

But teenagers have a right to decide how they are going to handle private discussions like this one. The school had ZERO role in this situation. And, providing information to the parents that the school shouldn't have been in possession of? Totally over the line.

 

[Aunt Spiker]

I think that when it comes to matters of personal sexuality, young people should be allowed to discuss these issues with their parents on their own terms, and school officials shouldn't be in the middle of what is essentially a private matter.

You put it that way and it seems sensible.

 

[liblady]

I think that when it comes to matters of personal sexuality, young people should be allowed to discuss these issues with their parents on their own terms, and school officials shouldn't be in the middle of what is essentially a private matter.

I have a 17-year-old. If I'm doing my job as a parent, she's going to tell me what's going on with her. If I'm not, it's not the schools job to remedy this. If my child is breaking the rules of the school, or is committing what would be a criminal act, or is causing disruption, or is being victimized in some way, the school needs to tell me.

But teenagers have a right to decide how they are going to handle private discussions like this one. The school had ZERO role in this situation. And, providing information to the parents that the school shouldn't have been in possession of? Totally over the line.

there was one reason these "teachers" did what they did..........and it wasn't for the good of the student. they should be fired, and publicly outed for who THEY are.

 

[Catz Part Deux]

You put it that way and it seems sensible.

That's because we're both moderates.

 

[Real Korimyr #9]

there was one reason these "teachers" did what they did..........and it wasn't for the good of the student. they should be fired, and publicly outed for who THEY are.

Fired? They should be charged with false imprisonment and assault and sentenced to prison. It's the principal and superintendent that should only get off as lightly as being fired and humiliated, after the school district is forced to pay a substantial settlement.