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Thread: Obama on Moms Who Stay Home to Raise Kids: 'That's Not a Choice We Want Americans to

  1. #121
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    Re: Obama doesn't want Moms staying home to raise their kids. Wants the state to do i

    For those of you extolling having a parent stay at home with the children - assuming they are a good parent, that is great for the kids. That is not an option for single parents. Nor is it an option for people not making enough income with one parent. I also think it's not the wisest thing to do - what happens if the wage earner dies, or becomes disabled? and it also puts a lot of pressure on the wage earner. It's not easy to be the sole support of one's family. I'm glad Vesper was able to resume her/his career, but most stay at home moms/dads aren't able to resume their careers anywhere near where they left off after going back to the workplace.

    As Aunt Spiker, mentioned above that govt. sets minimum wage, but can't force businesses to pay above that. I recommend research into income inequality; productivity has gone up since the 70s, but incomes have stagnated or gone down (part of this is do to the attacks on unions). Families have to have two incomes to have a chance of staying above water. The recent recession was in a large part due to families using money they pulled from their houses in order to make up for the income stagnation; when values crashed, they had nowhere to turn.

    I happen to make a decent income; but I've had one raise since 2009, and it was pretty small. (And yes, I'm rated highly on my annual review and my company swears they value me.) Since 2009, medical costs, gas costs, and all other costs have gone up. My husband is on disability; so his income is fixed. I'm lucky I have a decent income. Others aren't so lucky and have similarly seen their costs go up while their incomes stagnate.

    In this day and age, having good, affordable preschools so parents can work is important. I'm not saying every parent has to choose that option; but that's an option they should have. And that's what that part of Pres Obama's speech was saying.

  2. #122
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    Re: Obama doesn't want Moms staying home to raise their kids. Wants the state to do i

    Quote Originally Posted by Aunt Spiker View Post
    No - let's not skew things, here.

    For the lifestyle and amenities people feel they need and / or want - the average family has to rely on dual incomes or a gracious single income. So let's not pretend like personal choices and lifestyle don't play into how much it costs to actually live VS live comfortably these days.

    Let's also not forget that government does not control the cost of living or income.

    Perhaps pointing all fingers to the government and not enough fingers to the individuals that make up the US is part of the actual problem, eh?

    Government sets a minimum wage but there's not a single law or rule that REQUIRES businesses to pay that little. Taxes and a few other expenses are all that the Federal government can affect or dictate. Everything else is corporate, individual and state government concerns.
    and very few places other than food service actually pay minimum wage...at least if you work there for a little while.

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  3. #123
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    Re: Obama doesn't want Moms staying home to raise their kids. Wants the state to do i

    As for the OP, personally I think there are plenty of other things that could be done as well to allow women who choose to go back to work to do so while still ensuring their children are taken care of. Protecting families from having to pay extra rent to have a live-in nanny live with them while they are living in apartments would be a start. Stop punishing people or allowing others to punish people for having larger, extended families. I understand having legitimate limits on the number of people per bedroom/space within an apartment or house being rented, but not in allowing them to charge extra for adults that are normally living there to help the family make more money. Offer training for being a nanny for young women and men, work on making background checks easier in order to allow for parents to arrange for affordable care for their children when they do want to go back to work.

    Now, I don't think that Obama was saying that all women who had children need to go back to work and leave their children in the hands of strangers. He was saying that if a woman wants to go back to work after having a child, that choice needs to be affordable and worth it for parents to make. When many jobs out there don't even pay enough to pay for childcare these days or just barely pay for it, it makes going to work pretty pointless. If I had to pay for childcare for me to go to work now, I would be paying more for that childcare than I would make from working parttime at my job (which I was doing til about last week), even with my children in school now. And forget it with the reserve duty. My entire reserve pay would go to pay for childcare if I didn't have someone else available on the weekends.

    Not all parents are lucky enough to have the support that I have from my family though, and for them, it should be affordable to get childcare for their children, and stay at home parents should get some consideration for that experience where appropriate (although this one really wouldn't be practical to legislate).
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  4. #124
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    Re: Obama doesn't want Moms staying home to raise their kids. Wants the state to do i

    Quote Originally Posted by vesper View Post
    Is it me or did this speech come across like if you are a woman with children it's like some albatross that keeps her from ever achieving a goal of a good paying job if she stays home with her children? So we need to collectively provide pre-kindergarten schools in our public school systems so that she will have the opportunity to fulfill her potential in the workforce? Am I understanding this correctly? As long as mom took the personal responsibility to complete here education before deciding to have children along with a supporting male, how is taking a few years off keeping her down and hindering her from future good wages? Look, I made the personal choice to quit my job and be a stay at home mom until my children were in school. I didn't want to send them to a germ infested daycare, I wanted to be there when they took their first steps, or pee in the potty for the first time. I was the one that wanted to make sure in those first years it was me instilling the values I wanted them to possess, not some stranger. For a period of 8 years to compensate the loss of income, I opened a cake decorating business out of my home. Was it something I ever dreamed I would do? No. But who would have thought a $25 Wilton cake decorating class at the community center could turn into such a lucrative business. After the kids were in school, I picked up my career where I left off. Through the years I changed course but no matter what I chose to do I excelled. That isn't something government can make happen for a woman, that comes from the individual with the fire in their belly to succeed.
    Good for you. You were able to get around the lack of good jobs by starting your own business.

    But, for those moms who are trying to get back into the workforce, it's a hard road. When there are multiple applications for every job, it's easy to simply discard the resumes of people who have a gap in employment. It is necessary to winnow down the applicants, after all, and that's one easy way to do it.

    And, not everyone who is raising kids alone chose to be a single parent. Sometimes, the choice of mate turned out to be a bad one. Sometimes, people die young and leave little kids for someone else to raise.

    And having a good education isn't enough for the job seeker any more. You have to have an education in some field that is in demand. If the job seeker has a nursing certificate, then a job is likely to be available. A masters degree in psychology isn't likely to be of as much help.

    The choice of day care/stay at home mom (or dad, why not?) should lie with the individual. Sometimes, the choice is made for them by necessity.

    And the idea that the government is somehow involved in a plot to make sure all kids are in state run daycares based on one sentence spoken by the POTUS is about as absurd of a conspiracy theory as I've heard, and there have been some pretty absurd ones promoted on this forum.
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    Re: Obama doesn't want Moms staying home to raise their kids. Wants the state to do i

    Obama has already muttered the nonsensical and already debunked figures of wage inequality. He is obviously a feminist thinking person. Feminism is in bed with socialism and marxism which is all about the state raising the kids. Is it really surprising that he would support such propaganda based on the roots he came from and the people he surrounded himself with before he was president. He may have tempered his marxist and socialist tendencies in order got elected, but they are still there and they have effected policy.
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    Re: Obama doesn't want Moms staying home to raise their kids. Wants the state to do i

    Quote Originally Posted by dittohead not! View Post
    and the idea that the government is somehow involved in a plot to make sure all kids are in state run daycares based on one sentence spoken by the potus is about as absurd of a conspiracy theory as i've heard, and there have been some pretty absurd ones promoted on this forum.
    exactly!

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    Re: Obama doesn't want Moms staying home to raise their kids. Wants the state to do i

    Quote Originally Posted by Capster78 View Post
    Obama has already muttered the nonsensical and already debunked figures of wage inequality. He is obviously a feminist thinking person. Feminism is in bed with socialism and marxism which is all about the state raising the kids. Is it really surprising that he would support such propaganda based on the roots he came from and the people he surrounded himself with before he was president. He may have tempered his marxist and socialist tendencies in order got elected, but they are still there and they have effected policy.
    I nominate that post for the "barefoot and pregnant" award.
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    Re: Obama doesn't want Moms staying home to raise their kids. Wants the state to do i

    Quote Originally Posted by mac View Post
    and very few places other than food service actually pay minimum wage...at least if you work there for a little while.

    Table B-3. Average hourly and weekly earnings of all employees on private nonfarm payrolls by industry sector, seasonally adjusted
    Exactly.
    Even around here - where our state min wage is lower than the fed government (the only state in which this is the case) it's common to find jobs that pay $8.00 - $10.00 / hr.
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    Re: Obama doesn't want Moms staying home to raise their kids. Wants the state to do i

    Quote Originally Posted by Dittohead not! View Post
    I nominate that post for the "barefoot and pregnant" award.
    The only difference between this line of thinking and misogyny is the option a woman has to be a real woman is different. Feminists and Misogynists are strange bedfellows in that they both want to control women's lives.
    - There was never a good war, or a bad peace.
    - Idealistically, everything should work as you planed it to. Realistically, it depends on how idealistic you are as to the measure of success.
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    Re: Obama doesn't want Moms staying home to raise their kids. Wants the state to do i

    Typical short sighted opinion.

    It's more important to FAR too many Americans to throw their children in daycare to be raised by strangers which allows (usually) Mom to make enough money to buy that swimming pool then it is for a parent (usually Mom) to stay at home and raise their child in a place that offers unconditional love.

    Anyone that can afford to raise their child but instead throws them in daycare because they want a career is a failure as a parent in my opinion.
    And if anyone is offended by that statement...GOOD.

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