Moderator's Warning: Knock it off folks. Talk about the topic, not each other. There will be no more warnings, thread bans and infractions for any more of it.
But you're right. You would know what's better than someone who's been through it.
And you think calling a victim the SAME as a perpetrator is somehow a good way to make a point.
There is ample research that the harm on victims is continued by those who surround them. When parents of victims constantly talk of shame, horror, disgust, etc., the child frequently can't differentiate that the shame, horror, and disgust is directed at the act and not them. Thus, they respond be feeling ashamed, horrified, and disgusted with themselves.
Your disgust with sexual abuse of children is justified. It should be punished heavily in a court of law and I wish to hell that there was no statute of limitations on the crime.
But your belief in how the victim to respond is actually just a continuation of emotional harm.
To be honest, this thread has raised more anger in me than I've had in years and it's because people like you - who have no idea what the suffering is actually like pretend that you know what's right for the victim and pretend that you care about the children who suffer.
You only care about your moral outrage instead of what actually helps victims heal. Violence didn't heal this guy. It made his life worse. Unless, you consider $25,000 bond and threat of jail time and court costs worth the brief bit of release he may have gained by beating up the perp.
I'm sorry, but you don't know what you're talking about here. I do. I've lived it. You haven't. It's obvious that you haven't because you'd never compare a victim to a member of NAMBLA if you had. No one who has experienced it would be so ****ing disgusting as to say something that vulgar, hateful, spiteful, and liablous.
Revenge plots and getting people back decades later make for entertaining movie plots. In real life, the justice is sadly never that poetic (thus the victim getting jailed for beating up his perp).
And look, I know now I should have said something when I was a kid. But the problem is 8 and 9-year-olds don't really have the perspective that young adults and full-grown adults do. I spent years running away from it. It took more than a decade to face up to it and then get past it and have the great life I have. There's nothing I can do about what happened almost 30 years ago, so why bother? Again, I hope to God that no other child has been harmed. Since my perp was younger, the odds of therapy working are actually stronger and as far as I know he's not been arrested for any later abuses nor has he shown up on any notification lists (believe me, I checked once when I went back to my hometown after he returned there).
So dont sit there and tell me how pathetic you are because you were abused as a child. Youre not the only person with a sad story and hiding in fear of it until this very day tells us alot about what type of man you are.