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Thread: Dad Accused of Using Stun Gun on Daughter's Friend Over Naked Photo

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    Re: Dad Accused of Using Stun Gun on Daughter's Friend Over Naked Photo

    Quote Originally Posted by reefedjib View Post
    In the case of teaching a teenager to be an adult, yes. There is little book knowledge that substitutes for making adult decisions.
    Not book learning, no. Mentoring however, yes.
    We became a great nation not because we are a nation of cynics. We became a great nation because we are a nation of believers - Lindsey Graham

    Quote Originally Posted by Fiddytree View Post
    Uh oh Megyn...your vagina witchcraft is about ready to be exposed.

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    Re: Dad Accused of Using Stun Gun on Daughter's Friend Over Naked Photo

    Quote Originally Posted by Redress View Post
    There has to be a line somewhere. Yes, 18 is an arbitrary spot for it to be, but so would any other age of majority.
    You are confusing issues. Laws are arbitrary; personalities are not. You do not suddenly become capable of better judgement on your 18th birthday; it's a slower process, and different for everyone. Ignoring legality, we can't just assume that someone is too immature to make sexual decisions knowing only that they are 17.

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    Re: Dad Accused of Using Stun Gun on Daughter's Friend Over Naked Photo

    Quote Originally Posted by Kandahar View Post
    You're right, it's considerably less dangerous than either of those things. Sending someone pictures of your junk isn't endangering anyone's life, unlike those.
    That's what's so funny about this... when kids get drunk or high or do something dangerous, well, kids will be kids. When they show each other their body parts, it's an outrage that must be stopped.

    Just another faux moral panic created by old people who can't stand these crazy kids and their darned cell phones and technology. If they did it as a kid it's ok, otherwise its a danger to society. It happens all the time, always has and probably always will.

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    Re: Dad Accused of Using Stun Gun on Daughter's Friend Over Naked Photo

    Quote Originally Posted by Kandahar View Post
    So let me get this straight: If she had been 18, it would have been perfectly fine, because she'd suddenly "have the experience and maturity to make good decisions" that everyone acquires on their 18th birthday. But since she was 17, she's a child who is incapable of thinking about the consequences...and therefore electroshock to the guy's testicles is the best solution?

    (And let's not even go into the fact that the picture was of the 23-year-old guy, not the innocent "child.")
    I think the people of California set the age of consent so high because they realize how unprepared their children are until the older ages. I would've expected to see an age of consent of 18 exist in ultra conservative states as that's the stereotype, but then it follows that a conservative family would raise more responsible children, better able to handle the world earlier on. Children from Liberal homes tend to seek sex about 2 years earlier than children from Conservative homes. Here in SD the age of consent for sex is 14, and marriage with parental consent at 16. Our children have a longer leash because they're more responsible. CA knows that their failed public education system and Progressive policies retard their children development, so let them decide what their age of consent is for themselves. If you don't like it, don't live there.
    Last edited by Jerry; 06-07-10 at 10:50 AM.

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    Re: Dad Accused of Using Stun Gun on Daughter's Friend Over Naked Photo

    Quote Originally Posted by Redress View Post
    There has to be a line somewhere. Yes, 18 is an arbitrary spot for it to be, but so would any other age of majority.
    I completely agree. Any age of consent is 100% arbitrary whether we're talking about sex, marriage, drinking or voting. There's nothing magical that happens on one's 18th birthday which automatically grants them an informed world view to then shape opinion of policy off of.

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    Re: Dad Accused of Using Stun Gun on Daughter's Friend Over Naked Photo

    Quote Originally Posted by CaptainCourtesy View Post
    I actually agree with you to a point. Sexting has become a way to harass others. Because teens have far less impulse control... a condition because of their brain development... when someone sends naked pictures, it is quite possible that those pictures can be used as a harassment tool. I've seen this lots of times. Someone will "sext" a picture to someone, who will then spread it to others to embarass that person. Is there a way to stop this? Probably not, similar to trying to stop teens from having sex. Best course of action is early education on this sort of thing, both on internet and cell phone usage, and on interpersonal relationships. The better and more open relationship one has with their child, the more likely they will be able to help them and possibly prevent things like this.
    But the failure is in seeing it as something that is never acceptable. If they send it to someone they hardly know, or they don't realize the potential consequences, then sure. If it's a mature 16 or 17 year old sending to someone they really know well and trust, there's really nothing I see wrong. Like teen sex, it's not inherently bad, but can be depending on the situation.

    And frankly, even where it is a bad thing, I'd rather my child sext than drink or drive without a license or do drugs or actually have sex or any number of things that it's often considered normal young adult behavior.

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    Re: Dad Accused of Using Stun Gun on Daughter's Friend Over Naked Photo

    Quote Originally Posted by CaptainCourtesy View Post
    I actually agree with you to a point. Sexting has become a way to harass others. Because teens have far less impulse control... a condition because of their brain development... when someone sends naked pictures, it is quite possible that those pictures can be used as a harassment tool. I've seen this lots of times. Someone will "sext" a picture to someone, who will then spread it to others to embarass that person. Is there a way to stop this? Probably not, similar to trying to stop teens from having sex. Best course of action is early education on this sort of thing, both on internet and cell phone usage, and on interpersonal relationships. The better and more open relationship one has with their child, the more likely they will be able to help them and possibly prevent things like this.
    I'd like to see the schools step up to the plate with a wide range of tech etiquette instruction. Computers, cellphones, texting. What is the proper media for what type of communication? When is it rude to be texting? When is a phone call or face to face interaction called for?

    I have a rental and have had a fairly good relationship with the couple who are moving out on July 1st. We communicated very well, mainly by texting. We had a misunderstanding recently and I told her that we could not work this out by text, and I insisted the wife call me, and we were able to have a conversation and work out our issue.

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    Re: Dad Accused of Using Stun Gun on Daughter's Friend Over Naked Photo

    My take...

    The 23 year old was wrong with regards to the law. I have little moral qualms with a 23 year old with a 17 year old. I think that's pushing the age thing quite a bit, but without any other factors its hard to make a judge. For example I might think differently about:

    a 17 year old girl that managed to go to a local college party and meathead frat guy acted the Big Awesome College guy and essentially pressured her into the notion and they've flirted since as she feels its a status thing and he's just happy to have a young floozy

    than I would about:

    a 17 year old that was a year ahead of most of those her age and a 23 year old who had been held back one year in elementary school, and thus had met as a freshmen / senior in High School and reconnected a few years later on facebook and something sparked.

    And it goes on.

    I knew a number of 17 year olds, boys and girls, that were freshmen with me in college because they had either been skipped ahead or had a birthday in such a way that they were generally a year younger than everyone in their class based on its date in conjunction with how the school happens. Maybe that's why in general I view 17 a bit different than 16 and below in regards to "case by case basis" type situation.

    So while I don't know if I'd say wha the guy did was morally wrong, it was definitely legally wrong. Like it or not, the law is the law, and you gotta respect that OR if you don't you gotta own up to the punishment. The dad should've called the cops and go from there.

    Now, similarly, what the dad did was wrong with regards to the law. You can't essentially kidnap or incarcerate someone (which forcing him to get tied up is just that) and then assult them. Its just not legal. Again, in regards to the morality of it, I'm kind of iffy as I understand the notion of wanting to defend ones daughters or seek revenge for it, but at the same time I buy the "innocence manipulated" type of notion when its a 17 year old instead of a 13 year old. If it was the latter you'd have no question in my mind whether I had an issue morally with what the dad did or not. However, he broke the law, and the law is the law, and he's going to have to own up for it as well.

    If I was a jury, if these were the facts and the only facts presented, I'd convict without hestitation. If the girl was 14 or less then you'd probably have a great deal more hesitation in me then I would for this. If she was 11 or under i'd dare say I'm unsure which way I'd go at all.

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    Re: Dad Accused of Using Stun Gun on Daughter's Friend Over Naked Photo

    Quote Originally Posted by Redress View Post
    Not book learning, no. Mentoring however, yes.
    Mentoring yes, but by age 17 the mentoring should be minimal unless there is a demonstrated problem. I don't see going out with a 23 y/o as a demonstrated problem, unless he's a douche.

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    Re: Dad Accused of Using Stun Gun on Daughter's Friend Over Naked Photo

    Quote Originally Posted by Dav View Post
    You are confusing issues. Laws are arbitrary; personalities are not. You do not suddenly become capable of better judgement on your 18th birthday; it's a slower process, and different for everyone. Ignoring legality, we can't just assume that someone is too immature to make sexual decisions knowing only that they are 17.
    Actually, you are kinda confused here. The law makes it's arbitrary line due to best guesses about personal ability. We designate 18 as being an adult, since at that point, generally, more often than not, hopefully, people will be able to act as adults. Individual's are different, but you cannot craft a law that takes this into account.
    We became a great nation not because we are a nation of cynics. We became a great nation because we are a nation of believers - Lindsey Graham

    Quote Originally Posted by Fiddytree View Post
    Uh oh Megyn...your vagina witchcraft is about ready to be exposed.

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