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Thread: Nine Charged in Bullying of Massachusetts Teen Who Killed Herself

  1. #191
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    Re: Nine Charged in Bullying of Massachusetts Teen Who Killed Herself

    Quote Originally Posted by ADK Forever
    These kids didn't "threaten" violence. They committed violence!
    What violence? Throwing an empty Red Bull can at her?

    And just how is a teenage girl, maybe 90 pounds, supposed to "deal" with those "mean kids" when boys much bigger and stronger than her are beating on her, throwing soda cans at her head, raping her?
    This is why calling it "statutory rape" is stupid. Also, where is this "beating on her"? And what is abnormal about throwing stuff? Kids did that all the time when I was in school.
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    Re: Nine Charged in Bullying of Massachusetts Teen Who Killed Herself

    Quote Originally Posted by ADK_Forever View Post
    These kids didn't "threaten" violence. They committed violence!
    IF they did, then the should certainly be charged with the physical assaults.

    It is according to the LAW. What is your problem with women being raped? Do you seriously believe that all statutory rape is consensual? Seriously
    That's pretty much the definition of it. If it wasn't consensual, it would just be rape.

    And just how is a teenage girl, maybe 90 pounds, supposed to "deal" with those "mean kids" when boys much bigger and stronger than her are beating on her, throwing soda cans at her head, raping her? How should she deal with many other girsl beating on her? Huh
    As I said, IF they did physically assault her, then the cops should have stepped in right then.

    Sounds like you have no clue what this story is about or what actually is going on in our kids' schools. I suggest you educate yourself on this. I'd bet the farm that if your son or daughter came to you complaining of being bullied or raped that you would have a serious change of attitude.
    Bullied? No, I wouldn't have a change of attitude. Raped? Sure I would, but then the cops would have been involved and the person who raped her would have been charged right then and there.

    However, what's being alleged is STATUTORY rape. Whole different ballgame.


    It seems you aren't very familiar with a parents' responsibility. Is this the advice you would give to this dead teenager's parents? That they shouldn't have "coddled" her so much?
    I would give no advice to the dead teen's parents. At this point, there's no advice to give. What they "should have done" is not useful to them at this point.

  3. #193
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    Re: Nine Charged in Bullying of Massachusetts Teen Who Killed Herself

    Quote Originally Posted by Khayembii Communique View Post
    Ignore it until she graduates.



    If that happened then they could be charged with the crime.



    Because it is beyond her control.



    Because it is legal, and if it is not then she can press charges, but that would probably only make the matters worse.



    It has nothing to do with the "degree of bullying". That's a silly argument.
    Make her endure this for 4 years? I don't think so.

    There is also a charge to cover this type of bullying. It is called criminal harassment. A charge in place to try to prevent cases like this from getting to actual physical harm.

    So from adults, its beyond her control so she shouldn't have to ignore it, but from 9 or more teenagers, some older than her by a few years, it isn't beyond her control, and she should have to ignore it? That doesn't make any sense. How is their bullying in any way within her control? And what they were doing is not legal, it was criminal harassment. And it would have been a very good thing if she would have pressed charges before or instead of committing suicide.

    And the degree of bullying has everything to do with it. If it were just name calling at school, that, I can agree, can be ignored, but that is not what this was, in any way. These teenagers were verging on, if not already over, the realm of obsessive behavior, from the information we were given.
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  4. #194
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    Re: Nine Charged in Bullying of Massachusetts Teen Who Killed Herself

    Make her endure this for 4 years? I don't think so.

    There is also a charge to cover this type of bullying. It is called criminal harassment. A charge in place to try to prevent cases like this from getting to actual physical harm.
    There is no "making her". It just is.

    As for the criminal charge, like I said earlier, doing something like that tends to aggravate the situation, not alleviate it, but it was definitely an option for her to follow.

    So from adults, its beyond her control so she shouldn't have to ignore it, but from 9 or more teenagers, some older than her by a few years, it isn't beyond her control, and she should have to ignore it?
    What? The actions of others are beyond your control. The only thing you can do is to give off positive energy and hope some of it can stick (i.e. attempt to influence their actions), but if they still don't change their ways then there's nothing you can do about it.

    How is their bullying in any way within her control?
    My point was that it was not in her control, and so she should not let it affect her.

    And the degree of bullying has everything to do with it. If it were just name calling at school, that, I can agree, can be ignored, but that is not what this was, in any way. These teenagers were verging on, if not already over, the realm of obsessive behavior, from the information we were given.
    What specifically were they doing that made it "worse" than "normal bullying"?
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  5. #195
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    Re: Nine Charged in Bullying of Massachusetts Teen Who Killed Herself

    Quote Originally Posted by Khayembii Communique View Post
    There is no "making her". It just is.

    As for the criminal charge, like I said earlier, doing something like that tends to aggravate the situation, not alleviate it, but it was definitely an option for her to follow.



    What? The actions of others are beyond your control. The only thing you can do is to give off positive energy and hope some of it can stick (i.e. attempt to influence their actions), but if they still don't change their ways then there's nothing you can do about it.



    My point was that it was not in her control, and so she should not let it affect her.



    What specifically were they doing that made it "worse" than "normal bullying"?
    We will most likely not reach an agreement on this, because I fully believe that these teenagers deserve the charges they have against them. But I will respond to this post.

    If it is occurring, and no one is doing anything about it, then yes, she is being made to endure it, because she has to be at school.

    If she does not know that she can do anything about the bullying like press charges, then she can't do those things. She had just came to this country from Ireland, how is she supposed to know that she can actually get these students in trouble, especially up to pressing charges, without someone telling her that it is an option? Most students who have been here their whole lives probably don't realize this would be an option to excessive bullying.

    So how is it different if it were adults that were harassing her like the students were doing? Neither case is within her control, and neither should require that she would just have to endure the abuse and/or ignore it.

    When I was in high school, normal bullying generally took place at school, with the possible exception of teasing at bus stops or on the bus or if the others happened to run into the person alone or in a group of others who were being bullied at the mall or other local hang out. And it was generally 1 or 2 bullies. And the bullies didn't go out of their way to find you everyday, or almost every day, for 3 months straight. Nine or more students being involved is excessive. And they were stalking her at school, according to the reports. To me, it sounds like there was at least one, if not a group of them, waiting for her at most, if not all, of her classes or at her locker just to torment her.

    Hopefully, these teenagers will be found guilty for some, if not all, of their charges, and face punishments that are appropriate. If that happens, then maybe other students, parents, and school administrators will realize that bullying that goes this far should not be tolerated. And maybe we can work to get programs set up that make students see all the consequences of bullying, including the consequences to the one being bullied and what could happen to those who are doing the bullying. My hope would be that it will also help to convince other student who witness bullying to stand up for their classmates, even if the one/ones doing the bullying are their "friends".
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  6. #196
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    Re: Nine Charged in Bullying of Massachusetts Teen Who Killed Herself

    Quote Originally Posted by Khayembii Communique View Post
    Eckhart Tolle was clinically depressed, too.

    I'm a strong believer in the idea that humans have control over their "mental filter." External stimuli are filtered through a series of mental structures which we have ourselves constructed over the course of our development; these mental structures are inevitable in all of us, and by many they are constructed unconsciously. However, they can also be refined and restructured through conscious thought. This ability to structure and restructure ourselves consciously is one of the most significant things that separates us from all other beings on earth.

    External stimuli are taken in through the senses and filtered through these mental structures, and because these structures can be consciously conditioned this means that individual interpretation of this stimuli is a conscious act. This is why you see people that have a negative outlook on life continually view things in a negative manner; they set up their mental structures as to filter everything in such a way, and so they will keep on seeing the world in that way until they consciously change their structures.

    If Viktor Frankl was able to find meaning in life through his conscious restructuring of his mental structures while in a NAZI concentration camp, I am more than confident that this girl could have in a Massachusetts high school.


    Of course to everyone here that doesn't believe that humans are endowed with this incredible gift of enlightenment, this girl seems like a helpless victim. I wonder what would be the perception of her, though, if she brought a gun to school and shot up the place? Would she still be the "victim"? I highly doubt it. In that case the bullying would only be secondary, and those currently arguing against my point would paint her as a monster and condemn her. Yet the only difference between that scenario and the one that actually played out was her conscious decision.

    If she kills herself, then she is a helpless victim and the "bullies" are to blame. If she kills others, then she is a monster and she herself is the only one to blame (consequently the "bullies" would then probably become the victims in their minds). So the outlook on the bullying is entirely relative to her actions, which means that this position (and this sort of "ex post" moral judgment) is entirely baseless, as it does not look at the bullying itself outside of the consequences.
    You are confusing behavior with emotion. Folks may have control over the behaviors that could result from their emotions, but they cannot control those emotions, themselves. When you combine clinical depression, a chemical imbalance, with the impulsivity and over emotionality of adolescence you have a strong potential for behaviors like this.

    Also, different people are hard-wired differently and also have different experiences from which to assess a situation. That is why two people can have different reactions to the same scenario.

    Finally, bullying is bullying. Her response is irrelevant.
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  7. #197
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    Re: Nine Charged in Bullying of Massachusetts Teen Who Killed Herself

    Quote Originally Posted by rivrrat View Post
    Simple. Ignore them. You've said yourself that they're looking for a reaction. If you don't give them one, they get bored and move on.

    Second way, be nice to them. Smile, wave, tell them good morning, etc. Again, not the reaction they're looking for.

    I've found both of these tactics to be extremely successful in getting bullies to stop bullying.
    Just because that works for you, doesn't mean it works for others in other situations. I've seen each of these scenarios, or a combination, fail miserably. Some folks aren't looking for a reaction from the victim. Some are looking for their own self-gratification or for the admiration of others for being attacking. The latter is especially prevalent in situations like these, so your suggestions have no effect.

    Also, we are talking about teens, here. Completely different mindset.
    Last edited by CaptainCourtesy; 04-02-10 at 04:35 AM.
    "Never fear. Him is here" - Captain Chaos (Dom DeLuise), Cannonball Run

    ====||:-D

    Quote Originally Posted by Wiseone View Post
    This is what I hate about politics the most, it turns people in snobbish egotistical self righteous dicks who allow their political beliefs, partisan attitudes, and 'us vs. them' mentality, to force them to deny reality.

    Quote Originally Posted by Navy Pride View Post
    You can't paint everone with the same brush.......It does not work tht way.


    Quote Originally Posted by Wessexman View Post
    See with you around Captain we don't even have to make arguments, as you already know everything .
    Quote Originally Posted by CriticalThought View Post
    Had you been born elsewhere or at a different time you may very well have chosen a different belief system.
    Quote Originally Posted by ernst barkmann View Post
    It a person has faith they dont need to convince another of it, and when a non believer is not interested in listening to the word of the lord, " you shake the dust from your sandels and move on"

  8. #198
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    Re: Nine Charged in Bullying of Massachusetts Teen Who Killed Herself

    Quote Originally Posted by CaptainCourtesy View Post
    Just because that works for you, doesn't mean it works for others in other situations. I've seen each of these scenarios, or a combination, fail miserably. Some folks aren't looking for a reaction from the victim. Some are looking for their own self-gratification or for the admiration of others for being attacking. The latter is especially prevalent in situations like these, so your suggestions have no effect.

    Also, we are talking about teens, here. Completely different mindset.
    I was talking about teens too.

  9. #199
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    Re: Nine Charged in Bullying of Massachusetts Teen Who Killed Herself

    Quote Originally Posted by Khayembii Communique View Post
    Was the rape charge unrelated to the attack but instead to her previous personal relationship with an older classmate?

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    Re: Nine Charged in Bullying of Massachusetts Teen Who Killed Herself

    Quote Originally Posted by rivrrat View Post
    IF they did, then the should certainly be charged with the physical assaults.
    We're talking about a 9th grader who is new to the area, 3 months I believe, from a different country. You expect her to report this activity to the cops? I don't think you understand teenagers at all.
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