This is why people should not post from ignorance.
1) A law is not a military regulation. A military regulation is not a law. They are not the same thing.
2) DADT is kinda like fitness standards. If your body fat exceeds a certain amount, and you do not get it down, you are in violation of the standard and be discharged.
3) This part is slightly complicated(well, not to most people) so pay attention and do try and follow along. Under DADT if a command discovers a person is gay, a process starts. That process has to find 1 of 3 indicators to discharge a person. Those indicators are statements(saying "I am gay" to some one in the command...see note below on this), actions(getting caught having sex with some one of the same sex, all the way down to being seen holding hands with some one of the same sex...see note 2 below), and being married. If one of those indicators is found, then a discharge is indicated. No one is charged with anything, there is no NJP(Non Judicial Punishment), and usually the person is discharged honorably.
Now, it should be clear to you that in fact, she committed no crime. Are you going to continue this insanely foolish argument?
Note 1: Part of why DADT is such a bad policy is that it gives those looking to get out an easy way to do so. Back when I served, those who just wanted to get out would go UA(Unauthorized Absence) or do drugs till they got caught. The downside is this process was kinda slow, and during the process, life was not pleasant, being on restriction, extra duty, and so on. Now, if some one decides they don't want to be in the military, they just tell some one in their command "I am gay", and get a quick and easy out. This is, for a number of reasons, bad.
Note 2: Oddly, going to a gay bar is considered one of the low risk activities for gays in the military. It's not against the rules, being there is not an indicator, and odds are no one else from the command will be there, except possibly other gays in the command. Going to a gay bar is less risky than going to the mall with your significant other for gays in the military.