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Thread: California Supreme Court Upholds Proposition 8

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    Re: California Supreme Court Upholds Proposition 8

    Quote Originally Posted by Jerry View Post
    Would it be fair to say that women typically get married to young or before they have the chance to grow up a little, and thus make big decisions before they've developed proper judgment to know what they want out of life, out of a man?.
    Yes. I think that's entirely fair. I also think that women are raised with outdated and inaccurate perceptions of married life. We tend to overly romanticize what it will be like, particularly when we're young. Further, men and women are socialized with very different skills in conflict resolution, etc., leading to problems in handling conflict during the marriage.

    I think men AND women get married too young in the U.S., to be frank.

    And, if women initiate the majority of the divorces, it may be in response to male actions, such as infidelity.

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    Re: California Supreme Court Upholds Proposition 8

    Quote Originally Posted by Jerry View Post
    Wait...what? Transferable? I was married in CA 9 years ago and I've never had to "transfer" my marriage.

    Other states are required under federal law to recognize Domestic Partnership, but in no way does that mean anything is ever "transferred"....I don't even know what you mean by that. As a 7-year resident of SD, my marriage license is under the authority of Alameda County, CA.



    Gays can get a Domestic Partnership license, go down to the church and have a ceremony and call it "marriage". They can even call each other 'husband' or 'wife'.

    There's nothing left to fight for in the courts.
    I should have written "acknowledged" or "recognized" instead of transferred.
    What federal law states a state must recognize DPs? I've never heard that.
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    Re: California Supreme Court Upholds Proposition 8

    Quote Originally Posted by Jerry View Post

    I know how that is, just be sure you don't spend more on the lawyer than you'll get out of the child support increase
    The divorce itself cost 10 of thousands of dollars.

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    Re: California Supreme Court Upholds Proposition 8

    Quote Originally Posted by Jerry View Post
    Would it be fair to say that women typically get married to young or before they have the chance to grow up a little, and thus make big decisions before they've developed proper judgment to know what they want out of life, out of a man?

    I use women here because again, women initiate the vast majority of divorces. I'm not trying to be misogynistic, I'm trying to address the typical example per-se.
    Uh, is this song about you or Catz?

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    Re: California Supreme Court Upholds Proposition 8

    Quote Originally Posted by winston53660 View Post
    If the guy would pitch in I would not be bitching. If he would not steal packages off our front door I would not be bitching.
    From the perspective of someone who has definitely dealt with the anger thing: You need to alter your expectations, for your own mental health.

    Once you realize that he is who and what he is, and you can't change that, you will be freed to stop trying to control his behavior. You probably had little success controlling his behavior when you were married, and you will have zero success controlling it now.

    Just a free mental health tip from someone who's been there.
    Last edited by Catz Part Deux; 05-29-09 at 01:12 PM.

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    Re: California Supreme Court Upholds Proposition 8

    Quote Originally Posted by Cardinal View Post
    Uh, is this song about you or Catz?
    It's really okay. It's clear from Jerry's posts that he's working out his own issues, but I'm okay with handling criticism on this one. Certainly, divorce was not an easy decision for me, and it should not be as easy to do as it is.

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    Re: California Supreme Court Upholds Proposition 8

    Quote Originally Posted by Catz Part Deux View Post
    From the perspective of someone who has definitely dealt with the anger thing: You need to alter your expectations, for your own mental health.

    Once you realize that he's a **** and will always be a ****, you will be freed to stop trying to control his behavior.

    Just btdt.
    You are right. I'm just mad today at his smugness thinking he is father of the year when he doesn't do diddly squat. I'll drop it now and thanxs for letting me vent.

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    Re: California Supreme Court Upholds Proposition 8

    Quote Originally Posted by winston53660 View Post
    You are right. I'm just mad today at his smugness thinking he is father of the year when he doesn't do diddly squat. I'll drop it now and thanxs for letting me vent.
    I totally understand. We can rant elsewhere, if you'd like, rather than disrupting this thread.

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    Re: California Supreme Court Upholds Proposition 8

    Quote Originally Posted by Catz Part Deux View Post
    Yes. I think that's entirely fair. I also think that women are raised with outdated and inaccurate perceptions of married life. We tend to overly romanticize what it will be like, particularly when we're young. Further, men and women are socialized with very different skills in conflict resolution, etc., leading to problems in handling conflict during the marriage.

    I think men AND women get married too young in the U.S., to be frank.

    And, if women initiate the majority of the divorces, it may be in response to male actions, such as infidelity.
    In my case, she wanted out so that she could "establish me", whatever that's supposed to mean.

    So I'm left standing there with my 2 boys who need an intact home thinking "wtf, you were supposed to have don that already".

    I agree, men and women both get married to young. One difference I think is worth pointing out is that when a man gets married to young, he is far more likely to acclimate to the marriage ad become comfortable with it, while the woman is far more likely to become ever more frustrated.

    Maybe this is one reason men are more attracted to slightly older women?

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    Re: California Supreme Court Upholds Proposition 8

    Quote Originally Posted by Inferno View Post
    Who ever said that the public should vote on laws anyway?
    In California, the Constitution says so.

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