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Thread: Toddler dies in hot car as mom teaches inside school

  1. #191
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    Re: Toddler dies in hot car as mom teaches inside school

    Quote Originally Posted by Kreton View Post
    My kids are with grandma and my child is dying in the backseat of my car because X are not the same thing. Regardless of what you believe as to if it is possible for a parent to forget their children, even if she did happen to forget that she was killing this kid, in the end her actions, her negligence caused the death of this child. Feeling bad isn't a punishment. If your negligence causes death, it is a crime and I hope this woman rots in prison for a very long time for this.
    You said that people don't ever not know where their children are. Even told someone to ask any parent. I am a parent and I know how my brain works to at least some degree. I know what I've told people and, although I've never personally forgotten my children somewhere dangerous, I have forgot who they were with when asked or where exactly they were (hell I "lost" my son while breastfeeding him one time, kept asking my family where my son was and they kept pointing out the older one, because no one thought I could be talking about the youngest, who was attached to my breast at that moment, our brains don't always give us the right clues or connect them the right way). Even good parents forget where their children are sometimes or don't think about their children for long portions of time if they believe that their children are where they are supposed to be, somewhere safe.
    "A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

    Keep your religion out of other people's marriages.

  2. #192
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    Re: Toddler dies in hot car as mom teaches inside school

    This story sums it up so well.

    I Accidentally Left My Child In The Car

    It isn't bad parents that forget their children in the car, but simply parents, humans. Parents are humans too. They can make major mistakes.

    As for the years thing, prior to the 1990s, where did children normally sit when they were with someone in a car? In the front. We used to fight over who got to sit up front. Hell, I remember being about 4 years old, and sitting in the front seat with my great aunt at a light, playing with the lock on the door, no seatbelt, let alone a booster/car seat (which most states now mandate booster seats until 6 and/or 60 lbs or 8 and/or 80 lbs, and they must be in the back seat til they are 10/12, depending on state). The door popped open on me, and I fell out. Sure, I'd not likely have been left in the car by mistake (although I might have been left inside on purpose while my caregiver went to do something), but I also could have been killed by a car if that light hadn't have stayed red long enough to get me back in the car.
    "A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

    Keep your religion out of other people's marriages.

  3. #193
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    Re: Toddler dies in hot car as mom teaches inside school

    Quote Originally Posted by tres borrachos View Post
    Until the last 10-20 years or so, I never remember hearing of a parent forgetting a child. I never knew anyone who was accidentally left somewhere (with the exception of the movie Home Alone, which was supposed to be a farce). I never knew of anyone getting left on vacation, in the mall, in the hairdresser....nothing. If this phenomena is physical, I'd like to know how often this happened in history? Can anyone name a single instance of a famous story of some infant being simply left somewhere because the parents "forgot" about him/her?
    How about forgetting your child on the roof of your car?

    snopes.com: Baby Left on Car Roof

    In July 1980, six-week-old Brian Kornbach was left in his infant seat on top of the family car while the adults switched places in the front seat. The child was found by a roadside in Queens by a passerby who took the injured infant to the hospital. His parents did not notice they'd failed to bring their son in off the roof until they were somewhere in the Bronx.
    Read more at snopes.com: Baby Left on Car Roof
    And according to snopes, that is just a one of about 14 incidents like it that happened prior to 1993.
    "A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

    Keep your religion out of other people's marriages.

  4. #194
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    Re: Toddler dies in hot car as mom teaches inside school

    Quote Originally Posted by Kreton View Post
    My kids are with grandma and my child is dying in the backseat of my car because X are not the same thing. Regardless of what you believe as to if it is possible for a parent to forget their children, even if she did happen to forget that she was killing this kid, in the end her actions, her negligence caused the death of this child. Feeling bad isn't a punishment. If your negligence causes death, it is a crime and I hope this woman rots in prison for a very long time for this.
    Forgetting is not negligence. It isn't as simple as "that is negligence and that is a crime". Our laws do not work that way.
    "A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

    Keep your religion out of other people's marriages.

  5. #195
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    Re: Toddler dies in hot car as mom teaches inside school

    Quote Originally Posted by roguenuke View Post
    Forgetting is not negligence. It isn't as simple as "that is negligence and that is a crime". Our laws do not work that way.
    You're saying that leaving a child in a vehicle to die should not, in itself, be a crime? In other words, the result itself is not enough to warrant criminal prosecution?

  6. #196
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    Re: Toddler dies in hot car as mom teaches inside school

    Quote Originally Posted by roguenuke View Post
    This story sums it up so well.

    I Accidentally Left My Child In The Car

    It isn't bad parents that forget their children in the car, but simply parents, humans. Parents are humans too. They can make major mistakes.

    As for the years thing, prior to the 1990s, where did children normally sit when they were with someone in a car? In the front. We used to fight over who got to sit up front. Hell, I remember being about 4 years old, and sitting in the front seat with my great aunt at a light, playing with the lock on the door, no seatbelt, let alone a booster/car seat (which most states now mandate booster seats until 6 and/or 60 lbs or 8 and/or 80 lbs, and they must be in the back seat til they are 10/12, depending on state). The door popped open on me, and I fell out. Sure, I'd not likely have been left in the car by mistake (although I might have been left inside on purpose while my caregiver went to do something), but I also could have been killed by a car if that light hadn't have stayed red long enough to get me back in the car.
    Yes, being human means to err. There's an old saying "To err is human-to blame it on someone (something else) is even more human."

    Some in this thread have tried to make the case about how sometimes the brain can misfire giving excuses for the mother who forgot about her child in the car. Others have been less than compassionate and see the mother as a murderer of her child.

    Bottom line....to err is human but at the end of the day, we alone bear the consequences for our actions, our errs. Sadly, because of this mother's absentmindedness her child baked to its death in the backseat of a vehicle while mommy went and tended to a classroom of other children.

    Moms wear many hats. They are first aid medics, cooks, bottle washers, housekeepers, wives, taxi drivers, errand gals, nurturers, cheerleaders, etc. and often balancing a career through it all. But......the child that they have been given should always take top priority. If they are so pre-occupied with everything else over their child, then they are doing it wrong. And no, there wasn't a day I worked while I was away from my children that I did not think of them. Which blows my mind to think this woman, did not have any recall in 9 hours that she had forgot to drop her child off at day care. That is someone with their head up their ass.

    To err is human, blame it on someone or something else is even more human. Sorry, there are consequences for our actions. And my hope is through this tragedy and those like them that parents will come to the realization the need to keep their priorities straight.

  7. #197
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    Re: Toddler dies in hot car as mom teaches inside school

    Quote Originally Posted by X Factor View Post
    You're saying that leaving a child in a vehicle to die should not, in itself, be a crime? In other words, the result itself is not enough to warrant criminal prosecution?
    Intentionally leaving or accidentally forgetting? It shouldn't be and isn't always a crime (many who have forgotten their child in the car are not charged, others have had charges dismissed or been acquitted). I am a firm believer in intentions and actions being very important to whether something should be a crime or not, and especially in determining punishment.
    "A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

    Keep your religion out of other people's marriages.

  8. #198
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    Re: Toddler dies in hot car as mom teaches inside school

    Quote Originally Posted by vesper View Post
    Yes, being human means to err. There's an old saying "To err is human-to blame it on someone (something else) is even more human."

    Some in this thread have tried to make the case about how sometimes the brain can misfire giving excuses for the mother who forgot about her child in the car. Others have been less than compassionate and see the mother as a murderer of her child.

    Bottom line....to err is human but at the end of the day, we alone bear the consequences for our actions, our errs. Sadly, because of this mother's absentmindedness her child baked to its death in the backseat of a vehicle while mommy went and tended to a classroom of other children.

    Moms wear many hats. They are first aid medics, cooks, bottle washers, housekeepers, wives, taxi drivers, errand gals, nurturers, cheerleaders, etc. and often balancing a career through it all. But......the child that they have been given should always take top priority. If they are so pre-occupied with everything else over their child, then they are doing it wrong. And no, there wasn't a day I worked while I was away from my children that I did not think of them. Which blows my mind to think this woman, did not have any recall in 9 hours that she had forgot to drop her child off at day care. That is someone with their head up their ass.

    To err is human, blame it on someone or something else is even more human. Sorry, there are consequences for our actions. And my hope is through this tragedy and those like them that parents will come to the realization the need to keep their priorities straight.
    This is simply not how reality, even psychology works. We want to not only place blame, but insist on explicit punishment for far more than necessary circumstances. Almost anytime someone dies. It is one thing if there is intent to do harm or true gross negligence (drinking and driving), but another if it is a mistake that anyone can make, even if the result is absolutely tragic.
    "A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

    Keep your religion out of other people's marriages.

  9. #199
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    Re: Toddler dies in hot car as mom teaches inside school

    Quote Originally Posted by roguenuke View Post
    This is simply not how reality, even psychology works. We want to not only place blame, but insist on explicit punishment for far more than necessary circumstances. Almost anytime someone dies. It is one thing if there is intent to do harm or true gross negligence (drinking and driving), but another if it is a mistake that anyone can make, even if the result is absolutely tragic.
    No Roguenuke, not everyone makes such a tragic mistake. Very few do. And those few who do face consequences for their negligence. Period.

  10. #200
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    Re: Toddler dies in hot car as mom teaches inside school

    Quote Originally Posted by vesper View Post
    No Roguenuke, not everyone makes such a tragic mistake. Very few do. And those few who do face consequences for their negligence. Period.
    Everyone doesn't make that mistake, but almost anyone can. And without knowing yourself very well, you can't know for sure if you are going to be the one to make that mistake. Many more forget their child than end up facing the consequence of having their child die on them. But, in general, those children who are remembered before tragedy strikes are lucky that something provided that clue to someone that they needed to remember or simply help the child.

    And yes they all face some consequence for their forgetfulness.
    "A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

    Keep your religion out of other people's marriages.

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