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Both sexes have the same restrictions. Both sexes have the same allowances. Equality between the sexes already exists.
The truth is SSM isn't about the sexes, it's about sexual orientation, and there is not equality between the sexual orientations. Heteros can marry whom they are naturally attracted too but gays cannot. That's inequality, that's where the 14th Amendment comes in. Why can't pro-SSM just be honest about that for a change?
Because that is only part of it. Anyone can legally marry someone they are not attracted to for various reasons, so long as they are of the opposite sex. Attraction is not a requirement of marriage. It is just as valid to show that the bans discriminate based on sex as it is to say they discriminate against mainly those who are not heterosexual.