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Thread: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room[W:829]

  1. #301
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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by Gathomas88 View Post
    I kind of "shock therapied" myself with it a while back. For the most part it was alright, but there are a few things which I really wish I hadn't watched.

    It is honestly kind of amazing how much difference the environment can seem to make though.

    As I said before, a lot of hospital deliveries look absolutely awful.

    i.e.

    Woman: "AAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHHHH!!!"

    Doctor: "You have to push!"

    Woman: "AAAAHHHAHAHHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHH!!!"

    And that just carries on until the baby comes out.

    The alternative stuff is more relaxed a lot of the time.

    I've honestly seen a couple of water births where the woman barely even grunts before the baby slides out.
    Some women are also built better for birthing. I happen to be very small boned and very slim. I had front labor and back labor at the same time. I can take a huge amount of pain based on other injuries and ailments, but I couldn't take back labor and front labor at the same time. I had to finally allow for an epidural after 20 hours on my first. ...when I was in labor with my second, same thing except I opted for the epidural within about 4 hours.
    My point is that it isn't just the place where birthing, there are many different factors to the level of pain, not the least of which is the size of the woman and the size of the baby.
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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    In many parts of the world the dad is not allowed in by default.

    I don't think it's unreasonable to give women in labor this kind of control. It's their body and their vag being stared at by whoever's in there. It's kind of a touchy subject.

    They should have control over who gets to see that. Some dads show up with video cameras and everything. I wouldn't want that **** near me.

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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Does he have to pay child support?
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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by year2late View Post
    Why is there need to go further? The mother of their unborn child says his presence would be too stressful. I haven't read so much about this, but was the doctor ever asked? Because medically, forcing people who are already in great pain and stress to be further compromised I with added stress is usually not acceptable and can be downright dangerous.
    The reason is that the law gives the mother the right to extract financial support from the father. That's why. If the law said that the mother is solely responsible, then I would agree, there would be no reason to go further. But since we don't do that, then the father has some right to be there. If the mother has a problem with that, she should be able to demonstrate that to an objective, reasonable 3rd party.

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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by Summerwind View Post
    Some women are also built better for birthing. I happen to be very small boned and very slim. I had front labor and back labor at the same time. I can take a huge amount of pain based on other injuries and ailments, but I couldn't take back labor and front labor at the same time. I had to finally allow for an epidural after 20 hours on my first. ...when I was in labor with my second, same thing except I opted for the epidural within about 4 hours.
    My point is that it isn't just the place where birthing, there are many different factors to the level of pain, not the least of which is the size of the woman and the size of the baby.
    Of course. Some women face complicating factors during pregnancy and delivery which make the drugs and surgical procedures hospitals are capable of providing a necessity. I never meant to imply otherwise.

    I was simply saying that there does appear to be a certain amount of truth to the claim that less stressful birthing environments can make for easier deliveries where women without such complications are concerned. Unfortunately, a lot of hospitals aren't really geared to provide that.

    However, as other posters have already mentioned with the growing trend towards specialized "birthing rooms" and other amenities of the like, this does appear to be gradually changing over time.

    It also does lend credence to the idea that having persons present for the delivery that the mother does not want could potentially cause unnecessary problems.
    Last edited by Gathomas88; 03-14-14 at 09:33 AM.

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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    I guess if she wants to go through that **** alone, it's her problem. I watched all my kids' births.
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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by Gathomas88 View Post
    I kind of "shock therapied" myself with it a while back. For the most part it was alright, but there are a few things which I really wish I hadn't watched.

    It is honestly kind of amazing how much difference the environment can seem to make though.

    As I said before, a lot of hospital deliveries look absolutely awful.

    i.e.

    Woman: "AAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHHHH!!!"

    Doctor: "You have to push!"

    Woman: "AAAAHHHAHAHHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHH!!!"

    And that just carries on until the baby comes out.

    The alternative stuff is more relaxed a lot of the time.

    I've honestly seen a couple of water births where the woman barely even grunts before the baby slides out.
    Why?

    I've never seen a water birth, but I've heard good things, such as it's much less traumatic for baby too.

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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by American View Post
    I guess if she wants to go through that **** alone, it's her problem. I watched all my kids' births.
    Well, I'm thinking they aren't on very good terms at the moment, and she doesn't want him around her when she is going to be in such a vulnerable situation. Do you blame her? Would you want someone you didn't like in there with you, if you were the woman?

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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by MildSteel View Post
    The reason is that the law gives the mother the right to extract financial support from the father. That's why. If the law said that the mother is solely responsible, then I would agree, there would be no reason to go further. But since we don't do that, then the father has some right to be there. If the mother has a problem with that, she should be able to demonstrate that to an objective, reasonable 3rd party.
    Sorry, but this is completely irrelevant as to whether or not the father should be present during the birth. He is paying child support for creating a child.

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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by ChrisL View Post
    Well, I'm thinking they aren't on very good terms at the moment, and she doesn't want him around her when she is going to be in such a vulnerable situation. Do you blame her? Would you want someone you didn't like in there with you, if you were the woman?
    Don't attack me, I don't care.
    "He who does not think himself worth saving from poverty and ignorance by his own efforts, will hardly be thought worth the efforts of anybody else." -- Frederick Douglass, Self-Made Men (1872)
    "Fly-over" country voted, and The Donald is now POTUS.

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