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New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room[W:829]

Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

what is her side of the story? she was having sex with another man in their house while their children were there for months. she ****ing admitted it.

He may not have kept the toilet seat up.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Well there must be a reason why HE didn't get custody. If the court denied him custody, it was for a reason.

We've told you the reason.

You can stick your fingers in your ears all you want and block out truth, but the ONLY way a man gets physical custody of kids is if he can show the mother to be absolutely incompetent to a negligent or criminal level. Period.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

No, he is father, but thanks for missing the point. When you use terms meant to demean men do you really think they won't just say "**** you" and ignore you? What makes you think it is actually helpful to your cause?

It's not to demean men. It's to demean sperm donors.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

We've told you the reason.

You can stick your fingers in your ears all you want and block out truth, but the ONLY way a man gets physical custody of kids is if he can show the mother to be absolutely incompetent to a negligent or criminal level. Period.

It's bull. If the mother admits to negligent behavior, and the father is a good dad, they are not going to award custody to the negligent parent.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

It's bull. If the mother admits to negligent behavior, and the father is a good dad, they are not going to award custody to the negligent parent.

Re-read my post, please. Thank you.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Well there must be a reason why HE didn't get custody. If the court denied him custody, it was for a reason.

I'm not buying it. If she was having sex with strange men in the home for months while her children were under her care, then she is neglectful, and if she admitted to it, then she admitted to neglecting those kids.

the reason HE didn't get custody? SHE was related to the judge and HE didn't have the money to keep fighting it for years and years in court.

this was rural alabama where the "good old boy" system and nepotism is still in full effect.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

No it's not unreasonable. If she doesn't want him there, she should be able to demonstrate why his presence would be disruptive. I've been around pregnant women. Even when they are not pregnant hormones can make women respond in funny ways.

A woman in labor should get the benefit of the doubt. Their attention should be focused elsewhere
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

It's not to demean men. It's to demean sperm donors.

They are fathers. I'm not really interested in going over this term again, but yes, the term is meant to demean. Maybe people can try respect, and who knows, they might get better results. Just a thought.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

http://www.irp.wisc.edu/publications/focus/pdfs/foc142c.pdf

Myth #2: There are not many custodial fathers
Many people think that the number of custodial fathers is so
small that it is insignificant. In fact, some researchers use
the terms "single-parent families" and "female-headed
families" interchangeably, as if only women head one-
parent fa mi lie^.^ At one time, female-headed families made
up such a large percentage of one-parent families that re-
searchers could safely assume that they were representative
of all single-parent families. Today, however, this may no
longer be the case. According to data from the CPS, in
1989, there were 1.4 million father-only families, com-
pared with 7.4 million mother-only families and 25.5 mil-
lion two-parent fa mi lie^.^ And although father-only fami-
lies do constitute the smallest number of families with
children in the United States, they have been growing at a
faster rate than mother-only families and two-parent fami-
lies. As indicated in Figure 1, between 1959 and 1989, the
number of father-only families increased by almost 300
percent, with most of this increase occurring after 1973.
The number of mother-only families increased by almost
200 percent during this same period, while the number of
two-parent families remained the same
.6

As you can see, more and more fathers are getting custody of their children because the dynamics of the "traditional" family have been changing.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

the reason HE didn't get custody? SHE was related to the judge and HE didn't have the money to keep fighting it for years and years in court.

this was rural alabama where the "good old boy" system and nepotism is still in full effect.

The judge didn't recuse? The hell is up with that?
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

I think it's interesting that people haven't figured that government imposed child support is a disincentive and causes more men to abandon their children, not an incentive that gets more men to support their children. Think of it like a tax. Every single tax that is compulsory causes a disincentive to take part in whatever it is towards. It is not different for child support. It's one of the reasons the problem is getting worse, not better.

LOL That's like saying laws against bank robbery causes more banks to be robbed. If the fear of prosecution does not make a father do the right thing then not prosecuting deadbeat dads will make things WORSE. You have it backwards we make things illegal so their will be less of that behavior.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

They are fathers. I'm not really interested in going over this term again, but yes, the term is meant to demean.

Nope, a father is one who knows his child and cares about his child and is a father. Just like a mother who doesn't care for her children would be considered an incubator and not really a "mom." Mom and dad are the ones who care for you, nurture you and love you.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

the reason HE didn't get custody? SHE was related to the judge and HE didn't have the money to keep fighting it for years and years in court.

this was rural alabama where the "good old boy" system and nepotism is still in full effect.

This sounds HIGHLY unethical. I'm very skeptical of your friend's story. There must be more to it.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

LOL That's like saying laws against bank robbery causes more bank to be robbed. If the fear of prosecution does not make a father do the right thing then not prosecuting deadbeat dads will make things WORSE.

No, it's saying that removing peoples property by force and making them a servant of someone else against their will makes people react badly. You will never experience better results as long as the system is in place. You don't have to believe me, but in twenty years when it is EXACTLY like it is now if not worse, don't look at me like I didn't tell you so.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

No, it's saying that removing peoples property by force and making them a servant of someone else against their will makes people react badly. You will never experience better results as long as the system is in place. You don't have to believe me, but in twenty years when it is EXACTLY like it is now if not worse, don't look at me like I didn't tell you so.

:screwy
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Nope, a father is one who knows his child and cares about his child and is a father. Just like a mother who doesn't care for her children would be considered an incubator and not really a "mom." Mom and dad are the ones who care for you, nurture you and love you.

Look, I have had this talk many times with many people and what you describe is not accurate. Good day.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room


Believe what you will, but what I said is basically supported by any basic understanding of human nature and reflected very easily in economic matters. The system of child support will never turn out better results. Period.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

It's bull. If the mother admits to negligent behavior, and the father is a good dad, they are not going to award custody to the negligent parent.

And more mothers than ever in the past are losing custody, particularly full custody and even having to pay child support. Some women are even being made to pay alimony. Pretty sure that shows at least a change in the right direction here when it comes to child custody and the sex/gender of parents. However, unfortunately, this issue has a lot of components and its not easy to get a proper decision that is going to be fair for everyone.

Ken Altshuler: This Mother's Day, More Moms Paying Child Support

10 Things You Should Know About Child Support - Wellness & Empowerment - EBONY
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Look, I have had this talk many times with many people and what you describe is not accurate. Good day.

:2wave:
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Believe what you will, but what I said is basically supported by any basic understanding of human nature and reflected very easily in economic matters. The system of child support will never turn out better results. Period.

Umm, no.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room


Sorry, but yes, what I said is exactly right. This is even understood when they tax things on the market.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

I think it's interesting that people haven't figured that government imposed child support is a disincentive and causes more men to abandon their children, not an incentive that gets more men to support their children. Think of it like a tax. Every single tax that is compulsory causes a disincentive to take part in whatever it is towards. It is not different for child support. It's one of the reasons the problem is getting worse, not better.

So what is your solution?
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

So what is your solution?

He thinks it should be a "choice" for men as to whether they support their children or not.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Sorry, but yes, what I said is exactly right. This is even understood when they tax things on the market.

No, we do the things we do regarding child support because we have to. If there was no need, we wouldn't do this. They go after these guys because the women collect social services to support themselves and their children. A lot of times in the past, they would NOT give the father's information. Now, if a woman (or a man) is collecting social services for a child, the agency will actively go after the absentee parent for money, as it should be. If it was the way you wanted it to be, ALL of us would be paying for these children.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

And more mothers than ever in the past are losing custody, particularly full custody and even having to pay child support. Some women are even being made to pay alimony. Pretty sure that shows at least a change in the right direction here when it comes to child custody and the sex/gender of parents. However, unfortunately, this issue has a lot of components and its not easy to get a proper decision that is going to be fair for everyone.

Ken Altshuler: This Mother's Day, More Moms Paying Child Support

10 Things You Should Know About Child Support - Wellness & Empowerment - EBONY

The fact that instances like these are stories are testaments to their rarity. In these situations, it's easy to tell who's the man, who's the dog, and who's being bitten.
 
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