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New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room[W:829]

Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Ok, then show me how I'm wrong. I will even admit I'm wrong and back down, but I'm not doing anything like that just yet.

you dont have to ADMIT you are wrong and i have no interest in you admitting it, it doesnt change the fact that you are lol it is also meaningless if you "back down" or not. THat wont change the fact that your statments were either.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Ok, then show me how I'm wrong. I will even admit I'm wrong and back down, but I'm not doing anything like that just yet.

From recent personal (at least I know the parents very well in the case) experience, judges do not always rule for the mothers, even when there are some extenuating circumstances in a pretty conservative state. I know of a mother who was told specifically that she could not deny access to the father of the child without a court ruling and if she continued to do so, she would lose custody. While women are favored within the law when it comes to children by many judges and in many cases, it is not always.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

I would agree that it's a privilege and up to the mother. I think that delivering a child is a very personal moment for a woman and that it should be up to her discretion who is allowed to be there with her. Child birth is painful and uncomfortable enough, and she shouldn't be forced to feel even more uncomfortable.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

I think the point of her giving birth is a gigantic red herring in the first place, and it's really only a news story because several hot button issues surrounds the story -- it incites people's emotions. A medical procedure is private, period. If the newspaper could have found a way to cram abortion or gun rights into the story they'd have done so in a New York minute.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

The interesting thing is that many women don't actually get to ever see their children born. Yes, we experience it, but not really see it (not head and body out of the vagina anyway). I have two sons and I did not see my own hoohah while having them at all (not that I see this as a big problem). My husband was there for the first, and my sister saw both. He saw more than I did (the first glimpse I had of my firstborn was when the doctors and nurses (there were about 7-8 total in the room by the time he came out) were wrapping him in blankets as they moved him over to clean him up and do the apgar tests on him, I remember thinking I delivered a xenomorph from Aliens from that brief glimpse I had of him while they stitched me up). Pretty sure women don't even have this claimed right to see their child born considering doctors can put a woman under for a C-section if need be.

There is no right to see your child being born. There is right to access to the child, but even that is limited, especially if the couple having the child is not married to each other and/or separated. And considering that many hospitals are putting the babies in with the mother from birth to discharge now, the mother would even likely have a right to deny access to her room, limiting access to the child even more. This decision will always come down to the mother's right to decide who she wants in the delivery room (after the hospital clears that people can be there), no matter where she delivers that child (with the only exception being if she delivers in some unexpected place accidentally) because her privacy, comfort and stress level while delivering the child is always going to outweigh any access rights to the child the father of the child might want to claim. This is her medical procedure. The baby isn't included until the baby is born.

Honestly, would it even really be a good idea for them to see it? From the medical training I've had with the Army, we're generally instructed not to allow persons who are in medical distress to look at parts of their bodies which might appear to be gruesome.

They say that it can contribute to sending them into shock.
 
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Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

I have a question. IF the claim is that fathers have a right to be in the delivery room, then would that mean that all potential fathers would have that right? Could a very promiscuous woman with several potentials for the father of her child be forced to have all those men in the delivery room? DNA tests take a lot of time to come back. Are they going to order an amnio just to determine who has the real right to access the room? What about adopting parents who are chosen before the birth? Do they have a right to be in the delivery room with any delivering mother? What if the mother is underage? Or rapists? What about sperm donors?
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

I have a question. IF the claim is that fathers have a right to be in the delivery room, then would that mean that all potential fathers would have that right? Could a very promiscuous woman with several potentials for the father of her child be forced to have all those men in the delivery room? DNA tests take a lot of time to come back. Are they going to order an amnio just to determine who has the real right to access the room? What about adopting parents who are chosen before the birth? Do they have a right to be in the delivery room with any delivering mother? What if the mother is underage? Or rapists? What about sperm donors?

That was the slippery slope the judge referred to, had he ruled in favor of the father.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Honestly, would it even really be a good idea for them to see it? From the medical training I've had with the Army, we're generally instructed not to allow persons who are in medical distress to look at parts of their bodies which might appear gruesome.

It can contribute to sending them into shock.

I'm just pointing out the irony of the claim that fathers have some right to view the birth when it might not even be a good idea for the mothers to see it.

(Although, it really hasn't been much of an issue. Some women do get to see it, especially when alternative birthing methods are used. And some hospitals (I know Tripler in Hawaii) have some sort of mirror setup that they can bring out that allows a woman to see the actual birth if she wants.)
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

The interesting thing is that many women don't actually get to ever see their children born. Yes, we experience it, but not really see it (not head and body out of the vagina anyway). I have two sons and I did not see my own hoohah while having them at all (not that I see this as a big problem). My husband was there for the first, and my sister saw both. He saw more than I did (the first glimpse I had of my firstborn was when the doctors and nurses (there were about 7-8 total in the room by the time he came out) were wrapping him in blankets as they moved him over to clean him up and do the apgar tests on him, I remember thinking I delivered a xenomorph from Aliens from that brief glimpse I had of him while they stitched me up). Pretty sure women don't even have this claimed right to see their child born considering doctors can put a woman under for a C-section if need be.

There is no right to see your child being born. There is right to access to the child, but even that is limited, especially if the couple having the child is not married to each other and/or separated. And considering that many hospitals are putting the babies in with the mother from birth to discharge now, the mother would even likely have a right to deny access to her room, limiting access to the child even more. This decision will always come down to the mother's right to decide who she wants in the delivery room (after the hospital clears that people can be there), no matter where she delivers that child (with the only exception being if she delivers in some unexpected place accidentally) because her privacy, comfort and stress level while delivering the child is always going to outweigh any access rights to the child the father of the child might want to claim. This is her medical procedure. The baby isn't included until the baby is born.

They have special rooms in some hospitals called birthing rooms now, which are more comfortable than your typical hospital room for delivering your baby. I think you have to reserve them in advance though, but they have a mirror on the wall so that if you sit up, you could watch the baby be born. :) Kind of a cool option to have.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

They have special rooms in some hospitals called birthing rooms now, which are more comfortable than your typical hospital room for delivering your baby. I think you have to reserve them in advance though, but they have a mirror on the wall so that if you sit up, you could watch the baby be born. :) Kind of a cool option to have.

Oh, I couldn't really sit up much when I was delivering my first child. I was pushing for over 2 hours with no progress and they finally brought in other options to aid the birth. There might have been a mirror there, but there would have been little way for me to see anything with a doctor in the direct line. (They had some sort of mirror contraption they could put up, but I doubt that would have worked very well given my state at the time.) I did have a birthing room too. Pretty much all the maternity rooms in Tripler were birthing rooms.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Proposed by whom and where, but more importantly how is it relevant?

Proposed by the person I quoted, at the location navigated to by clicking on the blue arrow therein. It's relevant because the person chose to consider the ruling at hand in a wider context. Do you object to considering wider context regarding the ruling herein? If so, by what neglect of intellectual considerations do you arrive at this narrow-minded objection.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

I don't need a medical reason to be there and how in the hell am I acting towards her body by being in the room? Get real. Her right to her body doesn't extend towards the entirety of the room. She doesn't own the damn room. I can be where I damn well please, and I have a right to the child, just as she does. I have a right see my child being born, period.

No, you don't. Period.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

I don't need a medical reason to be there and how in the hell am I acting towards her body by being in the room? Get real. Her right to her body doesn't extend towards the entirety of the room. She doesn't own the damn room. I can be where I damn well please, and I have a right to the child, just as she does. I have a right see my child being born, period.

If you aren't married really you have no right to her info. Even when you are there are still privacy laws in place. Technically it is not even legal to disclose medical info to a spouse unless they designate so.

According to the law, you don't have a right to peep in on her medical procedures if she doesn't want and neither does she have the right to do so to you. The gray area would come in with this still being the father's child and possibly a custody/parental right thing, but medically there is nothing that gives you any right to witness the birth of your child if the mother wishes for you not to be there.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

No, you don't. Period.

Unless you're the woman the state doesn't consider you having much rights at all. For that reason I don't care what they think.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Are you n the medical field?

If a mother is in immense pain, it will physiologically have a negative effect on the mother and possibly baby.

A mother stroking out from a hypertensive crisis due to excruciating pain is just FITH!

I do not think many of you appreciate the risks of childbirth and labor and delivery.

But on the pain control note, many women try for a natural childbirth. They may even go through classes to manage the pain and facilitate child birth. Of utmost importance is relaxation. Having an unwelcome observer seems like it is the polar opposite of attempting to maintain relaxation.

Seriously guys. Give it up. You want control and you cannot have it.

In the case of the man taking the pregnant woman to court....does anybody here think this was emotionally or physiologically a good thing for the mom (and baby that shares her life)

Excellent post. The bolded part is exactly what I've been thinking with all the posts of men who demand the right to force themselves into what will possibly be the most physically and emotionally traumatic event in a woman's life... because if they can force themselves into the birthing process, they feel as if they are personally in control of it.

P.S. They aren't. :lol:
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Unless you're the woman the state doesn't consider you having much rights at all. For that reason I don't care what they think.

Sounds like a temper tantrum.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

If you aren't married really you have no right to her info. Even when you are there are still privacy laws in place. Technically it is not even legal to disclose medical info to a spouse unless they designate so.

Unless the medical procedure is a vasectomy and then many, though not all, physicians will try to skirt around the law by refusing to perform the procedure unless your wife consents, which is not mandated by law. I suppose they're not too happy about being sued by wives who've wasted years in a marriage unable to conceive and somehow finding out about the vasectomy.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Sounds like a temper tantrum.

A temper tantrum over a couple he doesn't even know, no less.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Sounds more like I'm pissed off at the system.

A system that promotes privacy and allows a woman at her most vulnerable to not to become more stressed out - which may cause rise in heart rate and blood pressure and possible stroke.


Yup, that would piss anyone off!:roll:
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

A system that promotes privacy and allows a woman at her most vulnerable to not to become more stressed out - which may cause rise in heart rate and blood pressure and possible stroke.


Yup, that would piss anyone off!:roll:

What are the chances of that? Is there like a huge number of women dieing because the father was in the room that I'm unaware of?

Gosh, how do they even deal with the stress of the doctor being in the room? Jesus, those women be dieing with all that stress. Oh right, that doesn't happen.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

Unless you're the woman the state doesn't consider you having much rights at all. For that reason I don't care what they think.

That is such a crock. You do know that there are some MEN who have custody of their children? I used to baby sit for a guy who had custody of all 3 of his children. Just because the mother may not wish for you to be in the room with her during the delivery does not mean you don't have any "rights." That is not a right anyway. It's like having someone in the room with you when having surgery. It would be YOUR decision.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

That is such a crock. You do know that there are some MEN who have custody of their children? I used to baby sit for a guy who had custody of all 3 of his children. Just because the mother may not wish for you to be in the room with her during the delivery does not mean you don't have any "rights." That is not a right anyway. It's like having someone in the room with you when having surgery. It would be YOUR decision.

There is no surgery taking place. It's called giving birth, which is a natural process of the womans body.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

What are the chances of that? Is there like a huge number of women dieing because the father was in the room that I'm unaware of?

Gosh, how do they even deal with the stress of the doctor being in the room? Jesus, those women be dieing with all that stress. Oh right, that doesn't happen.

Obviously if the woman is uncomfortable with the father or anyone else being in the room with her, it is going to make her upset while she is already going through so much pain and discomfort. It's not good for her health or the baby's health.
 
Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

There is no surgery taking place. It's called giving birth, which is a natural process of the womans body.

Births turn into surgeries all the time. Cesarean sections are surgeries. There can be all kinds of complications.
 
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