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Thread: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room[W:829]

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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by roguenuke View Post
    If we got pregnant right before a split up and it went bad, yes. I've already said that if he was stressful to me during the other births and we were still on good terms otherwise, I would not allow him in. His feelings being hurt take low priority to the baby's and my own health. And any father/husband/SO who doesn't understand that is selfish.

    (Now, I've already discussed this with my husband and he actually agrees with me. He really doesn't want to be in the delivery room anyways. He had no interest in watching our children just be born and he was just there to provide me with comfort and support. If he isn't providing me that, he understands that he should just wait outside.)
    You have mentioned that he was not present for your second delivery.

    Out of curiosity, was that by your request, a voluntary decision on his part, or simply due to him having military obligations elsewhere?

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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by Gathomas88 View Post
    You have mentioned that he was not present for your second delivery.

    Out of curiosity, was that by your request, a voluntary decision on his part, or simply due to him having military obligations elsewhere?
    He was there up til he got called into work and we simply could not afford at that time for him to miss work. I agreed that it was okay for him to go since I had support there and he returned as soon as he got off work.
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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by roguenuke View Post
    If we got pregnant right before a split up and it went bad, yes. I've already said that if he was stressful to me during the other births and we were still on good terms otherwise, I would not allow him in. His feelings being hurt take low priority to the baby's and my own health. And any father/husband/SO who doesn't understand that is selfish.

    (Now, I've already discussed this with my husband and he actually agrees with me. He really doesn't want to be in the delivery room anyways. He had no interest in watching our children just be born and he was just there to provide me with comfort and support. If he isn't providing me that, he understands that he should just wait outside.)
    I wouldn't want to be in there either. However, I'm not arguing for me. I railed about Pigouvian taxes on smoking before and I've never had a cigarette in my life.

    It's about principle.

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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by TheGirlNextDoor View Post
    I still disagree. While the baby is growing and developing inside the mothers body, she did not conceive the baby by herself.

    It takes two to tango. That baby is equal parts of both people.

    Sorry....but if she dislikes the father that much to deny him the right to witness the birth....perhaps she shouldn't have bedded down with him in the first place.

    I don't care how much animosity there is between two adults..they have children together, they both better pull their heads from their asses and put those differences aside and figure out how to be parents. Separate yet together if it comes to that.
    The baby is most certainly not an equal part him and her, until it is no longer inside her. Simple physiology makes this indisputable in reality.

    If by chance he had beaten her and abused her, would you still feel she has no right to be free of him during the birth?

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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by roguenuke View Post
    He was there up til he got called into work and we simply could not afford at that time for him to miss work. I agreed that it was okay for him to go since I had support there and he returned as soon as he got off work.
    Gotcha. You had mentioned that your initial delivery did not go exactly as planned, and you had briefly touched upon the subject of "daddy PTSD" following hard deliveries earlier. As such, I was simply wondering whether that might've played a role in him or you not wanting him to be there for the second birth (especially considering the fact that, as you stated, he's not all that keen on watching the delivery process anyway).

    Thank you for answering my question.

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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by Gipper View Post
    I wouldn't want to be in there either. However, I'm not arguing for me. I railed about Pigouvian taxes on smoking before and I've never had a cigarette in my life.

    It's about principle.
    And the most important "principle" here is the health and wellbeing of the mother and the baby taking precedence over any father (or anyone not needed to actually help with the birth) being in the delivery room if for any reason his presence causes extra stress because it is the mother going through the birth, not the father.

    Parents have to think of what is best for their child, not for themselves. My husband smokes but not around my children nor me when I was pregnant. He puts aside his personal wants for what is best for the children, even when it causes him to miss out on things or to be inconvenienced. And being in the delivery room for the birth of your child is a personal want, not a need. No father needs to be there for the birth of their child.
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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Question for those who think the father should be able to over-ride the mother's wishes and force his way into the delivery room - do you think the mother should be able to force him to be in the room if he doesn't want to be and she wants him there?

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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by Scrabaholic View Post
    Question for those who think the father should be able to over-ride the mother's wishes and force his way into the delivery room - do you think the mother should be able to force him to be in the room if he doesn't want to be and she wants him there?
    yup.....
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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by Scrabaholic View Post
    Question for those who think the father should be able to over-ride the mother's wishes and force his way into the delivery room - do you think the mother should be able to force him to be in the room if he doesn't want to be and she wants him there?
    nobody educated, honest who cares about freedom and rights would say yes to that because that would also violate rights rights just like the man forcing his way in
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    Re: New Jersey Judge Blocks Dad From Delivery Room

    Quote Originally Posted by OscarB63 View Post
    yup.....
    Why?

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