I go home from work and what happens? Ignorant statements abound. Let me address a few things. Firstly, Chris brings up the point that it is "selfish" for someone with children to present that they are transgendered and begin HRT and SRS. This is a very simplistic view of a complex issue... something that runs rampant in this thread, especially from those who demonstrate their ignorance on this topic (some of whom I have already called out on this), but also from some people who should know better. How would someone presenting that they are transgendered and beginning HRT and/or SRS affect one's family and children? It would affect them, and it is silly to think that it wouldn't. It is a major alteration in the family structure and in parts of the person's identity and behaviors. Would it be devastating and destructive? Not necessarily. Most of you have no idea what happens with someone who is transgendered. Seems to me that a few of you believe that one day, a person wakes up and says "I'm not a man, I'm a woman", tells everyone, and then, the next day goes in for surgery. That is ridiculous. Let me explain how it happens.
Full disclosure. For those of you who don't know, I am a psychotherapist and have been for 20+ years. I have a private practice and specialize on adolescent issues. I am one of the few therapists in my area who treats folks with transgenderism. What happens when someone walks into my office and says "I'm transgendered"? Do I immediately say, "Yes, you are". No, not at all. That is against the standards of practice. The first thing I must do is determine if someone is transgendered or if they have some other psychosexual/psychological disorder. ESPECIALLY with adolescents (which is the time of someone's life where this issue often becomes evident), it is important to explore what process is happening, considering that sexuality during this time period can be both fluid and confusing. In my experience, the evaluation/determination phase takes about 3-6 months, though it can be variable. In my practice, 50% of the clients I have worked with who stated that they were transgendered, actually were. Now, does this mean the other 50% were lying? No. it meant that other things were going on that presented themselves with this thought-process/behavior, and once these things were uncovered, the individual no longer believed that they were the "wrong gender". In the other 50% of the cases, the evaluation determined that they were transgendered.
An important note is that Gender Identity Disorder, the APA's analogy for transgenderism has been declassified as a disorder in the DSM-V, just released last month. The new diagnosis would be Gender Dysphoric Disorder, a much more accurate term, indicating that someone is dysphoric about the conflict between their anatomical gender and their "brain" gender, NOT that this conflict itself is a disorder. After the evaluation phase, this diagnosis would either remain (if transgenderism is the conclusion) or would become a secondary diagnosis to whatever was uncovered if transgenderism was NOT the conclusion reached.
After transgenderism has been determined, continued counseling is key, first to assist the individual with any secondary psychological disorders. As should be apparent, anxiety disorders are very common, with concerns around telling others, their reactions, and future prospects in many areas. Exploration of a support system (key for success) is discussed and determined as is the individual's goals. Not all transgenders choose HRT or SRS. At this point, family members and/or other important people would be included (if appropriate) in the individual's issue. Now, notice... if you look at what I've written, quite some time occurs between revelation and presentation. NEXT, processing with the individual and their family/friends occurs (if appropriate). I am in this particular stage with one of my clients... and have been for over 18 months. No changes have occurred during this processing as it would be inappropriate. Notice again... none of this is immediate and none of it is done without the inclusion of people important to the transgendered individual's life.
An important footnote to this. >95% of all transgendered individuals who want SRS and go through SRS are psychologically symptom free after the surgery. It is truly a "cure" if one could use that word in this set if circumstances. This highlights the opposing consideration. An individual with GDD who is transsexual and DOESN'T get HRT, SRS or both will suffer from psychological issues that could both be debilitating and/or damaging, things that could affect their family either indirectly or directly. In these cases, it might be FAR more beneficial to the family structure in the long term for the individual to get SRS and more damaging to the family if they don't. Cuts both ways.
So, to answer Chris's question, yes, it will have an impact, but NO it will not be destructive since it is not immediate and if it is handled appropriately. The damage could be from how it's handled, of course, but it could also be from it NOT being dealt with at all.
As I have said repeatedly, this is NOT a simple issue that a quick one-liner will resolve. It's quite complex.