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Thread: Dad must pay child support for 3 kids that aren't his: Court rules

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    Re: Dad must pay child support for 3 kids that aren't his: Court rules

    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Guerrilla View Post
    I disagree to a point.
    There are clearly ways of making it better, it's just that there is a lot of resistance to such changes.
    One change that should be made is making infidelity a serious matter in a divorce, with some kind of consequence.

    As it is now, you can screw an entire orchestra, while married and not much will come of it.
    Err, in some states at least.
    That tide is slowly changing...More and more fathers are winning custody in court...The important thing in a divorce, as with much in life, is that when evaluating, and approaching a contentious fight, best to take the emotion out of it.
    Americans are so enamored of equality that they would rather be equal in slavery than unequal in freedom.

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    Re: Dad must pay child support for 3 kids that aren't his: Court rules

    Quote Originally Posted by Samhain View Post
    Pick your poison. Is the person who provided the sperm the father, as in Kansas: Kansas hits up sperm donor for child support - CNN.com , or is it who raised them?

    What happens if the biological father wants parental rights? Are you going to support kicking the raising father out of the picture in favor of the biological father, or would tell the biological father to take a hike since he didn't raise them?
    Easy choice.

    Biological father gets priority.

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    Re: Dad must pay child support for 3 kids that aren't his: Court rules

    Quote Originally Posted by j-mac View Post
    That tide is slowly changing...More and more fathers are winning custody in court...The important thing in a divorce, as with much in life, is that when evaluating, and approaching a contentious fight, best to take the emotion out of it.
    Regardless of the tide or who is usually winning it's still best not to get married to begin with.

  4. #234
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    Re: Dad must pay child support for 3 kids that aren't his: Court rules

    Quote Originally Posted by j-mac View Post
    That tide is slowly changing...More and more fathers are winning custody in court...The important thing in a divorce, as with much in life, is that when evaluating, and approaching a contentious fight, best to take the emotion out of it.
    The problem I have, at least in this situation, is that while I agree with Kori, the disputing father is the father, both legally and morally.
    I can't help but get past the problem that these children were falsely presented to him, as his.

    It's disgusting and just as immoral as the legal father trying to back out.
    I was discovering that life just simply isn't fair and bask in the unsung glory of knowing that each obstacle overcome along the way only adds to the satisfaction in the end. Nothing great, after all, was ever accomplished by anyone sulking in his or her misery.
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    Re: Dad must pay child support for 3 kids that aren't his: Court rules

    Quote Originally Posted by Henrin View Post
    Easy choice.

    Biological father gets priority.
    Therefore, the person who gets parental rights priority gets the responsibilities that come with that designation: parental support.

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    Re: Dad must pay child support for 3 kids that aren't his: Court rules

    Quote Originally Posted by j-mac View Post
    Well, it's a small point, but I think he may have meant court ordered. But, I do know this, for example child support in say Michigan is paid to a organization called "Friend of the court". They report to the court system, and are directed to collected court ordered support, and distribute it. If you don't pay, you won't find yourself in front of a bureaucrat, rather in front of a Judge.

    So, I guess if you want to split hairs, then you're correct, support is not paid directly to the courts, but they are paid to the state. A minor distinction.
    Then the state gives it to the custodial parent who can do whatever the hell they want to with it. They can buy the kids new shoes or they can blow it all at the casino or whatever.

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    Re: Dad must pay child support for 3 kids that aren't his: Court rules

    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Guerrilla View Post
    The problem I have, at least in this situation, is that while I agree with Kori, the disputing father is the father, both legally and morally.
    I can't help but get past the problem that these children were falsely presented to him, as his.

    It's disgusting and just as immoral as the legal father trying to back out.

    Well, that can be a mess, but regardless of the way in which they were presented to him, or if he up until the divorce thought they were his, the fact remains that to that point they were cared for, and treated by him to be his children. If he felt that way before the divorce, then he should, (only my opinion here) man up, and continue to feel that way after....It's not the kids fault that their parents made the mistakes they did.
    Americans are so enamored of equality that they would rather be equal in slavery than unequal in freedom.

    Alexis de Tocqueville

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    Re: Dad must pay child support for 3 kids that aren't his: Court rules

    Quote Originally Posted by Muhammed View Post
    Then the state gives it to the custodial parent who can do whatever the hell they want to with it. They can buy the kids new shoes or they can blow it all at the casino or whatever.
    NO! Child support, although very liberal in terms of what it is spent on, ie: housing, utilities, clothing, food, etc. If you can prove that your estranged spouse is taking the support money, and gambling it away for example, then you go back into court, and she could very easily lose those children.

    The receiving spouse must still put the money toward things that benefit the child.
    Americans are so enamored of equality that they would rather be equal in slavery than unequal in freedom.

    Alexis de Tocqueville

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    Re: Dad must pay child support for 3 kids that aren't his: Court rules

    Quote Originally Posted by j-mac View Post
    Well, that can be a mess, but regardless of the way in which they were presented to him, or if he up until the divorce thought they were his, the fact remains that to that point they were cared for, and treated by him to be his children. If he felt that way before the divorce, then he should, (only my opinion here) man up, and continue to feel that way after....It's not the kids fault that their parents made the mistakes they did.
    I agree, if nothing else, at least until they're grown.
    I was discovering that life just simply isn't fair and bask in the unsung glory of knowing that each obstacle overcome along the way only adds to the satisfaction in the end. Nothing great, after all, was ever accomplished by anyone sulking in his or her misery.
    —Adam Shepard

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    Re: Dad must pay child support for 3 kids that aren't his: Court rules

    Quote Originally Posted by Henrin View Post
    Easy choice.

    Biological father gets priority.
    I still don't get this.

    IF the children were young - maybe . . . but 12, 14 and 16 years of being with this man - That much time passes and no. It just doesn't flow that way.

    What - what if they were 30 and one died and then everyone finds out the truth from Mom - would their biological father be looked up and called in as next of kin? Or to make the arrangements? No

    What if one was 22 and went to jail - call bio dad up?

    No - biological only means something when that individual is in their life . . . and after all that much time (which is longer than my marriage) - the past is THE PAST and nothing to be conjured up *just* because a couple divorced.

    That's just a copout and it's bull****.

    It's up to the kids as they get older when and how they might want a relationship with their bio parent that's not in the picture - up to them and no one else to stir that pot. What if they don't?

    If they were 2 it might be a different story - but they're not. They're almost adults. In just 2 years the oldest will be 18. Right now she's a sophomore in high school It's only in their best interest if they WANT it for theirselves. It's bad enough Mom and Dad divorced - and bad enough they've learned all this about their selves. . . sounds like things are ****ty enough - and some want to have strange men they never know and might not want to know SUPPORT them now?

    Why - so the father they DO know can skip town and spite his children that he's raised just out of anger towards their mother?

    Wow - definitely NOT good for the girls - is it? No - it's not. At some point the PARENTS aren't factored in much at all and we're long past that time, here.
    A screaming comes across the sky.
    It has happened before, but there is nothing to compare it to now.
    Pynchon - Gravity's Rainbow

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