CATCH-22 UCMJ Article 134."Ever" is a long time.
But you may have missed this in my previous post: " On the other hand they may organize a BBQ at an individual home - which may be on base or off.
The issue isn't about whether the club "ever" holds an event at a volunteers home, the issue is about commands providing official recognition and command sponsorship to a Spouse Club which excludes spouses.
The "club" does not mandate that Family "A" or "B" MUST hold an even in a home. Nope not done. Someone, in such a situation, may volunteer to hold such an even. If another person doesn't want a homosexual to attend and event in their home, or a black, or a Jew - they just don't volunteer their home. If they don't want to participate in command spoored events at on-base location or at other homes - no one makes them attend, they are free no to show up.
There is no "association in question", if you don't want to associate - don't go. Attendance is not mandatory, it's voluntary. If you don't want to join the club don't, people are free to start their own private clubs and invite whomever they wish, they just can't be command sponsored.
I spent 20-years, 66 days, and about 16 hours on active duty before transferring to the Fleet Reserve, as someone that did join the military - You are not in a status where "you have no rights anymore".
Your rights may be curtailed, for example, free speech that is prejudicial to good order and discipline may be restricted. You are free to go to a Klan rally if you want in civilian clothes, you can attend political fund raisers and events for candidates in civilian clothes. You can even speak at such events. You may not though wear your uniform at such events or project yourself as a member of the military or to be acting under military authority. Evey base I was ever stationed at, I could own firearms. When I lived in base housing I had to register them with security, when I lived in the barracks they were stored in the armory. If I had been arrested for a crime (which of course I wasn't) I still had a right to counsel, the right of non-incrimination, the right to a speedy trial, the right to a day in court, the right to question my accuser, and the right to challenge a conviction on appeal. Military courts are different then civilian courts, that does not mean that rights do not exist.
Curtailed or function differently does not mean that you have no rights.